Hey Auld,
They actively employ their brains toward being good drones and toward remaining drones. I did, too.
Well I disagree in the sense that you may have employed your brains, but only with thoughts that were given to by others.
Somehow you got one of yours in there somewhere that made the programmed thoughts fall apart.... abort? retry? fail?
Seems like the fat lady sang? Nah not for me. It sings for me on graduation day of my youngest. I will hold out for her since I have to protect my children anyway. If she is still a drone on that day, I will hand her papers. On that day I go back to living for me, and living my life the way I intended. Not the way I was misled into.
In a sense though I guess it has sung. Something has died for me, and that is my vision of what our marriage was or what I thought I was to her. I realize I am a paycheck, an emotional ego booster, a hard-on, a repairman, a father to both my children and children whom I did not father... but not a spiritual father.
I am not fit for that job because I think God's approval comes through faith in Christ rather than a publishing company. The elders can fill in for that while I am at work paying attention to all those irrelevant "non-spiritual things". That way she can not work and has time to pay attention to all those "spiritual things".
So as long as I fulfill those needs for her, everything is cool with her. How I feel about any of that is irrelevant unless it effects my ability to perform the above mentioned duties. Yeah the fat lady sang. I will give her the chance to start a new show, but on graduation day... lights out.
CYP