since i know the truth about jw, and still have to go to meetings for family reasons (and because i don't want to leave my friends, either) i get so sick in my chair in the hall.
i can't pay attention, i can't sit still knowing it's all such a waste of time and a big fat lie.
i get weird symptoms like: the feeling that i'm going to almost pass out, very sweaty or very cold, and weak legs though i'm sitting down, and the urge to get up and run away.
I was having panic attacks with sobbing before every meeting. And when my mind wasn't engaged on some task, my brain felt like it was whirling, "What am I going to do? What am I going to do?"
It helped to come here and see that I wasn't alone, but I had to quit going before I (eventually) felt ok again. It took a long time. I recommend reading Steve Hassan's Combating Cult Mind Control.
after watching serenity's video i had to comment.
i kept pausing the video looking for family members or others that i might know but haven't seen in years.
hated the drive to holt, but loved the soft serve ice cream.
Welcome. My grandmother came in during the 30s. I think the depression brought a lot of people in. So I was third generation, but the madness ended with my kids who will not be part of it.
but when they end like that three times....it's strike three... or maybe it was strike #3,333,333.......but it is sad and painful for us both i know.....a person must be in a very very bad place to act like that in front a man you have loved and been intimate with for 15 years....and at that moment i am satan in front of her....a begging pleading attempting to reason satan...but still satan to her and her friends.....but this nice woman needs satan out of her life now....oompa.
i am not a bad person...i am not satan...i asked her why she thought i had tried so hard....told her that if she was in a burning building just how hard would she think i would try to get her out??
she did not like that analogy either...so i have started the painful process...the building is going to burn to the ground now....and i will never put her through that fingers in ears thing again.... and i will be fair and reasonable....and pay her the alimony and give her half....i could so be a satan to her in divorce....but i won't!...i can at least prove to them all that i am decent man...and not mentally diseased or satan.....and ahhhhh i feel good about that....plus both my boys are free now...
I am so sorry for your pain.
in case you don't see me here, i thought you should know that i am done here!
why??
because i'm going on a cruise to bermuda tomorrow for a week and i will be fondly thinking of each and every one of you while i bask on the beaches and enjoy the weather.. bye..
Have fun!
my daughter, ali, is back in the hospital.
probably something wrong with her pacemaker.
she had a cold with a bad cough last week, and a lead may have come loose.
I'm so sorry she is having to go through this, and you. Best wishes for a speedy recovery!
once people have come in, and the doorman and the mic men are in place, why are there a few other suits scattered about at the back?
i saw a guy get up, sit down, get up, sit down, get up and when i looked what he was up to he was reading the noticeboard and looking around, waiting for a bus.
i figured he wasn't doing much at that point, but anything to not stay seated.
Hilarious! No one stays in their seats less than the elders. They wander around, check the board, take a look outside, but the best part is the looks on their faces--serious men doing serious business!
my sisters' funeral service was just appalling.
an absolute disgrace.. http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/medical/216561/1/my-sister-died-this-morning-after-refusing-blood-on-four-occasions.
the funeral was held today for my sister when every opportunity was used as a sales pitch to promote their malignant message, in this case to any non jw's that may be present, just like any other pyramid scam it seems.. the person whose funeral it is just has a minor bit part to play compared to the main feature , the promotion of the all encompassing multi-talented multi-tentacled wts that you can rely on to guide misguide and pervade every nook and cranny of your life including when to die.. and why not, because as gods only prophet to all mankind, they don't just hear gods voice, they are gods voice.. ***watchtower 1957 june 15 p.370*** "it is vital that we respond to the directions of the "slave" as we would to the voice of god.
I am so sorry for your pain.
Back when witnesses used to talk to me about their real feelings, many said that they thought that funeral talks should be more about the person who died and less like a sales pitch. And many recognized that the "witness" given to "worldly" people wasn't a very good one since non-witnesses are more likely to be offended by the very little said about the person who died.
scans of "man with the secretary's inkhorn"--by request!
request from researcher: could you post some scans of wt artwork showing illustrations of the man with the secretary's inkhorn?
************************************************************************** my reply: coming right up!
Thank you.
no, not the joe walsh song.
one of our last co visits, he was railing on the apostates who can't just shut up and be quiet.
rabble rousers.
As a born in, 3rd generation witness, I, along with my husband and 2 children "walked away." We belonged to a family considered a pillar in the congregation. I pioneered right out of highschool (although I quit when it tried to kill me), my husband was an elder, the children good examples. Now, despite the fact that we haven't preached against the organization (except on this website), we are semi-shunned by all of my husband's family and all of our former friends. By semi-shunned I mean that most people will say hello to us if they run into us (although some turn tail and run and a few glare and turn away), but no one invites us anywhere or will accept an invitation from us.
We are gossipped about (one rumor we heard is that we had started out own religion). Because the organization teaches that there is no right reason to leave, anyone who does leave must be guilty of something. Therefore, when someone leaves, there is speculation. Is he secretly immoral, dishonest, apostate, deceived by Satan, too weak to live up to what he knows is the truth, or perhaps just crazy. And then they are puzzled when someone who leaves is bitter. After all, he chose his course, he knew what would happen, and if he wants his life back, he knows what he has to do.
during a quiet moment i picked the latest ypa book down from my bookshelf.
it's pretty much stayed there since my relatives came back from the latest convention.
i couldn't bring myself to see the extent to which the society is now trying to claw its way into the lives of teenagers.
And Cedars, thanks for pointing out that worksheet...I think I'll have a little fun with my kids tonight.
