curlers

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Posts by curlers

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  30

  Disfellowshipment

  by larc in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  on the subject of disfellowshipping, there is something i don't understand.

  many here have told their stories as to what happened to them.

  i have to ask this question.

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  curlers

  Larc

  I just had to respond to your post. When you're a JW and brainwashed, you buy their reasons for disfellowshipping. When you get away from the JWs and get a brain that can think for itself, any moron could realize that disfellowshipping is the most UN-Christan action. The Bible and the scripture that JWs use to defend their position is typical JW garbage where JWs put too much emphasis on a single phrase or sentance. The Bible is meant to give meaning through a whole passage not just one line. What about the prodgical son parable? What about Jesus time on earth?

  The biggest problem with disfellowshipping is the un-natural cut of tie between families especially parents and children. An organization tells JWs that they're more important than family ties. Its all blasphemous.
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  23

  My experiences at the assmebly....

  by airwlk149 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi guys!!!!.

  as most of you all know, i was going to the district assembly in san francisco, with my parents.. well, i went, and it was interesting.... here it goes....... i left on thursday night.

  my friend pam came to pick me up.

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  curlers

  I always thought one good thing about being a raised a JW is you learn self discpline but at what cost. My parents used to tie my one brother who was a toddler at the time to the chair at KH. I can remember the hand clamped over the mouth and dragged out for a beating during meetings. You do become really good at daydream and learning how to sit quietly and occupy your mind. If you fell asleep during a convention, my mom would pinch you. I remember hang out in back at Circuit Assembly as a teenager and my dad dragging me by upper arm to my seat by my mom. I was mortified. My dad would beat us in front of the congregation. This was 20-40 years ago. I went to a KH a year ago w/my parents and my brother-in-law smacked my 18 mo old nephew for making noise during the last prayer. I wanted to kick his butt. I'm so sad to hear that JW continue there militant discpline.
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  28

  YES!!!!!! Shunning has backfired!!

  by Dawn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was df'd a number of years ago.

  my parents never shunned me - they didn't feel that df'ing broke the family ties.

  but when my brothers or uncle were in town i was "allowed" to come visit at certain times when their other jw friends would not be around.

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  curlers

  Isn't shunning the craziest thing? I was df'd 20 yrs ago. I married the first time a non-JW who was accepted by my family. Later, I had a baby as a single mom. My child was accepted by my family. I remarried and had another child and now my husband and both kids are accepted by my family. So, I ask my family, you're suppose to be J Christian Ws and Christians are suppose to be loving. Yet, you shun me and let me have it every chance you get. Don't you think that my husband, kids or any non-JW relatives we have that see this are going to say, WOW, I'd really like to be a JW. Honestly, my husband, our non-JW relatives and even my 7yo kid think you're nuts. The saying goes you catch more bees with honey than vingear. My mom gets out the Bible and shows that one scripture that proves you're suppose to shun. But I do have one brother that agrees shunning is kind of archaic torture. My 7yo will not go visit my parents. She's already shunned them. I know it hurts my mom but she has the WTS to comfort her. Its so stupid. I, too, would like to see the day that the WTS is made to reckon with all the psychological and emotional damage they're done through shunning.
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  47

  Were you ashamed of being a witness?

  by sleepy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  were you ashamed of being a witness?.

  how did you feel about identifing yourself as a jehovahs witness to others?.

  i often used to hide it because of the stigma attacthed to it.. was anyone actually proud to be one?

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  curlers

  Its got to be one of the worse ways to grow up as a child. And I never believed in the borg even though I was born into it. That made the humilation unbearable. All of the above the others have mentioned. I used to just tell people my parents were retarded. I used to get beat up on the way home from elementary school b/c kids said I was a communist since I didn't salute the flag. Its like having your childhood stolen. Plus, I'm still embarassed to admit being raised as one b/c I was df'd 20 yrs ago and then disowned by my family. That's hard to explain.

  curlers
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  6

  Concerning Violence

  by metatron in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm glad to see open frank discussion on the subject of violence within - or caused.

  is seen as a recent provocation.

  failure to appear has always been a df'ing in absentia.

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  curlers

  The most wonderful person in the world was my paternal grandmother who was a Lutheran and has been gone for too long, 16 yrs. She was at Madison Square Garden. She hated JWs. The JWs had my grandfather leave my grandmother like WWII with four kids. Because she wasn't a JW, my parents told me she'd be destroyed at Armagadden. I was 5 and thought JWs are crap if they think the most wonderful woman in the world would die. Then when she dies 16 yrs ago and I was DF'd, my parents tell me that now she could be reserected because she died before Armagadden and supposedly she was studying with the JW right before she died. BS!

  Anyway, my Grandma called being DF'd being dismember as in a serial murder that dismembers the victim's body. That's a good description.

  First its known that JW look for vulnerable people to seduce into the religion. A lot of vulnerable people sometimes have trouble with mental illness like depression, anxiety, obssessive complusive disorder, etc... Or being the victim of abuse can lead to problems with mental illness. Then the icing on the cake is to be DF'd because you're a victim of circumstances and to be shunned is fertile grounds for problems with mental illness.

  I'm surprised there hasn't been more acting out against the WTS through violence or suing through the courts. In my case, I'm not violent but I didn't pursue police or court action because I thought I was the only JW being abused by my bio-dad and who would believe me.

  Think out loud, school violence, shootings in schools, they say these are the kids that are bullied taking a stand. This has gotten out of hand. I wonder if its possible that something like this could happen to JWs and the WTS.

  The abuse perputrated by the WTS and JWs isn't limited to child abuse. There are the cliches. There are the wives that must be submissive. There are kids that are beaten to within an inch of their lives like my older brother and myself. There is verbal abuse. It goes on and on. What if like the movie "Network;" "I'm mad a hell and I'm not going to take it anymore."

  The WTS and those individual self-righteous JWs that get off on saying they're better got a lot of explaining to do. I can't wait till they're really accountable.

  curlers
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  14

  Thanks to all on this board!

  by writerpen in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i joined this group in february, however had been surfing the various websites that expose the witnesses' lies since being disfellowshipped last august.

  the support from those sites and this board have been invaluable.

  today, i no longer have the fear of having left the organization.

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  curlers

  Congratulations on pursuing your degrees. I was DF'd 21 years ago. I started going to college at 26. I got an Associate at 28 and Bachelor degree at 37. There is nothing like education. I'd like to continue on for my Master's. Too bad JWs don't believe in higher education.
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  8

  Can only fellow apostates understand us?

  by sleepy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  can only fellow apostates understand us?.

  as a witness i often felt that i could only really get on , on a deep level with fellow witnesses.. they shared your outlook on life , and had similiar experiences and problems.kids who grew up as witnesses had been through the same things in school as me.. so even though i could get on with other people , in a way i felt connected to other witnesses.only they could understand me.. but know i feel an instant connection with apostates.. we now share the same things.in a even deeper way than when a witness , as what we have done has effected us even more.. is it possible to connect in the same way with people who havent been through the same things as us?.

  do you feel closer to others like you , and find it easier to make friends with such people?.

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  curlers

  There are decent "worldly people" as the JWs call them who can be sympathetic to your cause. But no one will ever understand what its like to be raised as a JW as someone who's been there. And especially no one can understanding shunning except another DF JW. I've been DF's for over 20 yrs. I've moved on and can deal with it. Yet, when I tell someone about how my parents and siblings have nothing to do with me, they can't understand.

  The world has changed so much in my 40 years. When I was a child, people were more strict, went to the church of their choice weekly. But today, with so much freedom in every aspect of life, no one gets it when you tell them how JWs are. I've gotten the feeling when I've told people about my JW upbringing and shunning, that they think I'm the crazy one.
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  9

  Phobias - Agrophobia and Demophobia

  by invisible in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  any other past/post sufferers who can describe these symptoms related to within the jw upbringing and comparison to outside, any improvements or no?.

  also anyone with any strange physical manifestations of 'strange' illnesses whilst a witness?.

  plus mental states, then and now, and what do you aspire to, to enable future happiness?.

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  curlers

  What is demophobia? But I've suffer with agorphobia for 20 yrs and been disabled by it for 10 yrs. The doctor I've finally found says that it a post tramatic stress syndrome from having been raised in a cult with whacko parents who used a militant type of discpline and control plus abuse. The doctor says that young minds can't endure the stress and it actually causes a chemical imbalance.

  I've been on medication for 15 yrs. I find the brainwashing of the JWs takes years to be eradicated. I went to counseling for years. I'm finally starting to get better but it stinks that the JWs robbed so much from me.
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  30

  30+ years of Field Service Observations

  by Tulsi Das in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  some very random thoughts based on 30+ years of field service activity.

  would especially enjoy responses by jt, alanf, amazing, & others.. why they do it.

  1. guilt.

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  curlers

  I agree with the other poster. FS is a big joke and about socializing or really gossiping. There are a few who really love preaching the "truth."

  What I hated was our territory was 8 to 10 towns. Elementary school kids were half of one town. Middle school was the whole town. High school was two towns. For me, the biggest humilation was going to a fellow students house to preach. Of course, it felt like a consiparcy b/c it seemed us kids were tortured into going in territories that were our home school area. There were 6 to 8 other towns to choose from but no, we had to go in our school area.

  My father is on sadistic, mean man. When he would give a sermon on Armagaddon, he would do it gleefully, almost rubbing his hands together, laughing, he, he, he, it bliss over the desruction that was at hand. He would love to see his kids horror when he'd make us go to a school mate's house. JWs very loving bunch.

  curlers
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  20

  Are JW Kids Worse Disproportionately?

  by patio34 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  in a conversation with my son, we were going over all the young people he grew up with that were jws.

  there seemed to be an inordinate proportion of felons among them, compared to the "worldly" people in his school.

  and also compared to the people at work that i know whose kids are doing fine now.. our tentative theory is that raising kids as jws can be very damaging to many of them.

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  curlers

  I have to get my two cents in here. Abaddon is totally correct. Most JWs kids raised in it winding up living a double life. The good little JW and the normal kid away from it. Lying becomes ingrained. A necessity. I hated being a JW b/c I felt like a freak. I'm just old enough that when I went to kindergarden and I didn't salute the flag, I'd get beat up and called a communist on the way home from school. This went on till third grade. I couldn't tell my parents b/c they'd say I was being abused for being a JW and that was a good thing.

  It got freaky when I realized I would lie about innocent things b/c I was so used to lying since I wasn't allowed to do anything. Now I hate lying but being a JW is was a way of life.

  I thought that were more twisted things in the JWs than among the "world." For example, we had a JW kid having sex with both his sisters. The JW boy wanted to have sex with his sister's friend. They were maybe 12 and she was scared. The boy's sister said don't be scared. I'll do it first. So, brother and sister did. Then the friend did. He was 14. This was about 1972.

  My JW friend was 18 and having sex with a married man that worked for her father and was friends with the guy's wife. He wanted a threesome and asked me to go. Not my thing. She brought her stepsister. The guy wound up enjoying the stepsister more. The JW friend wound up pregnant. By this time I was Df'd but I took her for her abortion. She hooked up with a JW boy who she had sex with before they married. Today, he's an elder.

  Oh, the stories.

  curlers