I am no longer a Jehovah's Witness. I stopped believing about a year and a half ago. I have been quietly fading into the background and I don't think I will get disfellowshipped any time soon because of various different reasons. I think, tho, that people have already been talking bad about me, but nothing official. My father is inactive, and my brother-in-law is just too lazy to go. My sister, my best friend, and my mother are fairly strong, or are fighting to become strong.
There are times when I appreciate “fading” because it allows me an avenue to rebuild my relationships which have been so fragmented while growing up. But sometimes when I keep up with current Witness events my blood boils. The Governing Body isn't just wrong, they're insidious liars; hypocritical about life and purposeful in their pain dealt to their followers; they whore out religion and God for the complete childish and selfish control and abuse of other people. These men should be punished to the fullest extent of the law.
I can feel the Armageddon noose tightening around my mom, friends, and sister. I can feel it creeping into my nephew's mind. The hype of the “End of False Religion” is a set up for another 1914 or 1975. Its the end of the world! Ahhh!
I keep silent because I don't want to irritate the already unstable relationships I am trying to mend. I keep silent. I've always kept silent. But is it worth it? Should I be speaking up and trying to save my family from their brainwashing? It would be different if Witness dogma was different. But it is dangerous! The Witness belief can kill people! They have no personality or mind of their own when it comes to the world outside. It breeds severe paranoia and hurtful, hateful things. When my mom dies, will I be able to forgive myself because I didn't at least try to get her out? When I'm old will I be able to live with knowing that I took no action and turned a blind eye to the abhorrent virus that is festering in my family's minds?
I'm so angry sometimes. I hate those people, those people like the Governing Body who abuse and control. There is no hellfire hot enough for those types. Selfishness! I hate them and their words and their stupid f#cking watchtower magazines. I hate their stupid beardless pathetic elders, I hate their rules, I hate their kingdom halls, I hate the podiums from which the dirty old pedophiles spew rancid poisonous thoughts that blaspheme and destroy. I hate their secrets, I hate their control. I hate they threaten to drive away my own family, I hate they cause friendships to be broken.
But, when it comes down to it, I can't quit second guessing myself. I think, and think, and time just passes by and the rift gets bigger and bigger. Is it better to not provoke it? Should I take the plunge and write the Disassociation letter and come out publicly? I just don't know. What should I do?
Morocco
JoinedPosts by Morocco
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4
Should I Do Something To Help My Friends And Family?
by Morocco ini am no longer a jehovah's witness.
i stopped believing about a year and a half ago.
i have been quietly fading into the background and i don't think i will get disfellowshipped any time soon because of various different reasons.
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Morocco
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1
Conversation with a friend. The true nature of Witnesses in their speech.
by Morocco inthis was a conversation between me and my x-girlfriend's sister that i dug up from the depths of my messenger program.
it happened a while ago during the big convention where they read the resolutions.
i highlighted by underlining certain words and phrases that i feel expose her true thoughts and the inherent feelings and thoughts of most witnesses.
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Morocco
This was a conversation between me and my x-girlfriend's sister that I dug up from the depths of my messenger program. It happened a while ago during the big convention where they read the “resolutions”. I highlighted by underlining certain words and phrases that I feel expose her true thoughts and the inherent feelings and thoughts of most witnesses. I also highlighted a few hard-hitting comments on my part. The conversation gets a little heated later on. I was trying to act nonchalant about the whole thing, as if I was still attending meetings and I still believed everything the Watchtower said. I was trying to act joking and not too serious – but she smelled a rat and I'm sure she gossiped about me after this was over. I just thought it would be fun to share. I'm Ryan by the way. I made a few comments in brackets at the end of some sentances, don't confuse those with part of the actual conversation! Enjoy!
[14:48] Ryan: Seventh:..We will resist with all of our strength the 'spirit of the world' that manifest itself in such things as materialism, unwholesome entertainment, overindulgence in food and alcoholic beverages, the plague of pornographic material and the curiosity or temptation that lures one into association with outsiders through internet chat-rooms
[14:48] Ryan: wasnt that part of the deliverance at hand resolution?
[14:49] Dalsey: yes, why?
[14:49] Ryan: like, are we not supposed to be talking to people online?
[14:51] Dalsey: no, I believe that is referring to the fact that there has been a big problem with witnesses associating with people outside of the truth more than neccessary, people who are not going to be spiritually upbuilding. you know?
[14:55] Dalsey: like last night there was a part on the meeting about how close to worldly people is too close. And how obviously we have to deal with them in our daily life and we should be kind and polite to them of course, but we dont want to be closely associating with them because they are not going to build us up spiritually, kind of like th whole one bad apple in with all the good ones? the good apples dont make the bad one good, it works in reverse. it was a lot about how cautious you have to be, that they dont drag you down or into something that isnt right.
[14:56] Dalsey: does that make sense?
[14:58] Ryan: yes, but i have a comment
[14:59] Ryan: i know that we have said before that the good apples dont make the bad ones good, ive actually heard those ideas before and its why we should stay away from worldly people
[14:59] Ryan: but the bible says that with every trial god will not allow you to be put in situations you can not bear
[14:59] Ryan: so... shouldn't it not matter that much? because i mean, the "spoiled" people are the ones who need the most help
[15:00] Ryan: i mean, being chummy with someone is one thing, but how can we be teaching truth to people if we are avoiding them ?
[15:04] Dalsey: yes I see your point, but at the same time, you have to be spiritually strong yourself and helping others to learn about Jehovah is what we are supposed to do you are right, but its not saying we avoid these people its saying we use caution,and we wouldnt just go and hang out with these people, because that would be in a sense seeking them out and that is something that we are told repeatedly not to do. and we are told that because it in many situations it doesnt wind up being beneficial for either party.
[15:06] Ryan: i see... so then, what does it mean "the curiosity or temptation that lures one into association"... curiosity of what exactly?
[15:10] Dalsey: the curiosity about the world and the things in the world. This is a bad thing, because it draws people away from Jehovah and out into the world.
[15:11] Ryan: thats true
[15:12] Ryan: i guess i just dont understand, because if you have faith in god nothing can break your faith
[15:12] Ryan: because god will not let you be tested beyond what you can bear
[15:12] Ryan: so dont we have an immunity with faith?
[15:12] Dalsey: thats true but Jehovah also doesnt tell you to go put yourself in a bad situation and he will protect you. (uuuhm -- sheeps among wolves?)
[15:13] Ryan: lol
[15:13] Ryan: yeah, i understand, but isnt that what going door to door is? actually going to peoples houses and making friends
[15:14] Ryan: i mean we go out for the express purpose of meeting as many people as possible
[15:14] Ryan: how different is the internet?
[15:15] Ryan: i guess what im saying is, remember when Jesus was condemned by the Pharasees because he ate with the tax collecters?
[15:15] Ryan: and the people who were viewed as really bad people?
[15:16] Ryan: jesus didnt care who he talked to on a daily basis because he had a message and whoever wanted to befriend him did so
[15:16] Ryan: if jesus did it whats the problem?
[15:20] Dalsey: because jesus was preaching to the people...not hanging out for fun
[15:20] Ryan: hm, it just didnt say that
[15:20] Ryan: i guess im confused by the vauge application
[15:20] Ryan: it just said "dont be curious of chatrooms"
[15:21] Dalsey: Jesus wasnt seeking to be their friends though, he was teaching them, he was spreading the truth about Jehovah
[15:22] Dalsey: Well, if you have questions about it, I think to have them answered in the best way possible, you should talk to an elder maybe. Because they obviously will have the correct view, and be able to explain or just talk to you about whatever.
[15:24] Ryan: yeah youre right, i was just wondering cause it sounded like it was saying "dont use the internet" maybe i just misunderstood it or maybe they didn't clarify what their point was
[15:26] Dalsey: think about this though, Bad associations spoil useful habits. the bible didnt say dont talk to people of the world because obviously we have to to some degree, but its saying associate, is referring to continual contact with people outside of the truth for recreation, and if your not discussing spiritual things with them, your just with them, outside of work or something, what else can you call it??
[15:28] Ryan: right
[15:30] Ryan: i just think its funny
[15:30] Ryan: i met krystal on the internet
[15:30] Ryan: two happy years so far!
[15:30] Ryan: lol
[15:33] Ryan: i guess a lot of people can't control themslves on the internet or something... but thats their fault
[15:33] Dalsey: that still doesnt mean its a good idea. Nikki met her husband online too, and shes been married a year and half, but she looked outside of the congregation and i know it killed me personally so think about how much more it hurt Jehovah.
[15:34] Ryan: yeah, but its not him thats stopping her from coming to the meetings
[15:34] Ryan: if he is a nice guy and treats her well, maybe she will decide to one day come back
[15:35] Dalsey: excuse me Ryan but you do not know about that situation. and even if he didnt outrightly tell her not to go, is he supporting he at all? No, he is not
[15:36] Dalsey: because he doesnt have a love for the truth, he doesnt understand the importance of it. and going to the meetings is hard enough when you have a family to support you, but when you have to go alone all the time while your spouse stays at home, its hard isnt it:?
[15:37] Ryan: well, i mean i dont know anything about whats going on, and im not trying to step on toes here... but no one made her look outside the org. either... please dont take offense to that but its the truth isnt it?
[15:38] Dalsey: no you are right, and i dont mean for it to sound that way. But, why did you? (asking why i looked outside the org.)
[15:38] Ryan: who said i did?
[15:38] Dalsey: im sorry not trying to step on toes either (BACKTRACKING)
[15:38] Ryan: no its ok im not getting mad
[15:38] Ryan: i was just curious
[15:39] Ryan: its pretty hard to piss me off you should know that :P
[15:40] Dalsey: heh, well I'm not trying to say Krystal is a bad person, please dont take
it that way, she seems very nice, but is she a witness Ryan? Does she help you spiritually?
[15:40] Dalsey: Maybe its not fair of me to say anything about any of it, I guess its not my business.
[15:40] Ryan: actually she does help me spiritually... but id still like to know who said she wasnt a JW
[15:40] Ryan: no, if your my friend it IS your business
[15:41] Dalsey: no one said she wasnt. (LIAR)
[15:41] Ryan: but you made the comment like you knew
[15:42] Ryan: im not going to go around busting heads, but i just wanted to know who
said she wasnt
[15:42] Dalsey: I apologize, I assumed and that wasnt nice, and if she does help you, then that is wonderful. But I just thought she had grown up around the truth but wasnt really a witness (TRYING TO ESCAPE)
[15:42] Ryan: you dont have anything to appologize for
[15:43] Dalsey: well, no to assume something like that wasnt right of me. And I feel bad for saying something like that when its untrue. (tricky)
[15:44] Ryan: i wont accept your appology because it IS true... she isn't a JW ... but why defend the person you heard it from? I won't get mad... its not like i dont know people talk
[15:45] Dalsey: Ryan I honestly didnt hear that specifically from anyone, it was just what I gathered. I believe Tyler and Cody told me she had grown up around the truth, but the rest was just my own thoughts. (still won't fully fess up, and I'm being nice!)
[15:45] Ryan: ah
[15:46] Dalsey: hey im sorry I just realized im late, good grief. I have to go for now, ttyl (suddenly she has to go)
[15:46] Ryan: ak
[15:46] Ryan: ok
[15:46] Ryan: holler at me another time
[15:46] Dalsey: mmk
[15:46] *** "Dalsey" signed off at Fri Aug 18 15:46:34 2006.
Session Close (Dalsey): Fri Aug 18 15:54:15 2006
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Special Talk on Saturday @ 3PM?
by Morocco ini was talking to a friend and he said the co (i think) was coming down this saturday for some special talk at 3 pm.
i don't ever recall special talks on a saturday, or as late as 3 pm -- what could it be?
unless i misunderstood that it was the co, maybe it was someone else.
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Morocco
that's it sir82, it was a bethel speaker. I just don't remember a speaker from Bethel ever coming in my 18 years as a dub. Shows how much I payed attention! What is the deal, what would they be talking about? Is the Bethel speaker there to say something unusually important or is it all the regular droning on about boring stuff?
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Special Talk on Saturday @ 3PM?
by Morocco ini was talking to a friend and he said the co (i think) was coming down this saturday for some special talk at 3 pm.
i don't ever recall special talks on a saturday, or as late as 3 pm -- what could it be?
unless i misunderstood that it was the co, maybe it was someone else.
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Morocco
rofl -- outlaw
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If Jesus Was Here, What Would He Say About Jehovah's "Christian" Witnesses?
by minimus inwell?
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Morocco
he would go into super saiyan mode and swiss-cheese the whole building, then he would fly around the earth, reversing its rotation, sending us back in time so he could stop Russell from founding a religion
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Special Talk on Saturday @ 3PM?
by Morocco ini was talking to a friend and he said the co (i think) was coming down this saturday for some special talk at 3 pm.
i don't ever recall special talks on a saturday, or as late as 3 pm -- what could it be?
unless i misunderstood that it was the co, maybe it was someone else.
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Morocco
I was talking to a friend and he said the CO (i think) was coming down this saturday for some special talk at 3 PM. I don't ever recall special talks on a saturday, or as late as 3 pm -- what could it be? Unless I misunderstood that it was the CO, maybe it was someone else. But he definately said saturday at 3, and it was a special visit or special talk. He is a pioneer but not a MS... hm... whats up with that?
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60
What has happened to America? Stop Bush, Stop The Ignorance.
by Morocco ini'm pissed today and i'm about to let it out.
i hope nobody gets offended because these are only opinions.
is anyone else outraged by our president?
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Morocco
well said ithinkisee
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What has happened to America? Stop Bush, Stop The Ignorance.
by Morocco ini'm pissed today and i'm about to let it out.
i hope nobody gets offended because these are only opinions.
is anyone else outraged by our president?
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Morocco
Heh, wow, good thing I have my fire-retardant suit on because there is a lot of flaming going on in here. It is funny to think how so many people on an X-JW site are really opinionated about politics. Didn't you guys learn ANYTHING from the Watchtower magazines? :) roflz into infinity
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What has happened to America? Stop Bush, Stop The Ignorance.
by Morocco ini'm pissed today and i'm about to let it out.
i hope nobody gets offended because these are only opinions.
is anyone else outraged by our president?
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Morocco
When I say Bush lied, I'm talking more about his famous “nation building” and the like. There are several things he has contradicted himself on and has backtracked on his words once this war started. I think the intel we used was as good as it could have been – if it was wasn't corrupt from the start. I can understand your points on diplomacy, and you may be right. (As much as I don't like the idea) Ultimately though I still feel that war begets war and in the future the only permanent solution is language. I'm really enjoying everyone's comments on this one.
There is one thing I didn't get off my chest that I want to say. I think Bush rode the wake of fear into war, like any leader would have done. And I think he uses fear to try and get control of our cell phones and emails so he can catch the bad guys. But in today's world it seems that there is almost an extremist view. Almost as if America's safety depends on its total domination by the government. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. I think America is in danger, if we don't turn it around, of becoming self-righteous and unaccountable for our actions. Americans aren't God. I think, generally, that everyone is in danger of the mindset that we can fight anyone we want, anyone who we deem a “terrorist” for as long as we want because, for some reason, we have the right to. This “War on Terror” is too big, it is an excuse to invade other nations at will. If Saddam was an honest threat, that is fine that we got him, but what happens over time when people become complacent and men in power use the war on terror to justify something that isn't honest?
I refuse the idea that sympathy for Iraqi human life or questioning the morality of this war is siding with the enemy. Those are the things a dictator would say, and those are the things the presidential powers have suggested. What really irritates me is the propaganda used to influence America and this extremist mindset. What it really boils down to is ways of thinking. If the religious extremist groups of the world didn't teach what they do none of this would be happening. I think Religion shoulders a lot of the blame for uncountable murders throughout time, and it is no different in our day. Look what is happening over beliefs in the middle east . . . what happens when the American religious belief kicks in? We are getting too full of ourselves. I've talked to a lot of guys at work and through friends that honestly believe that this is God's land and we have to kill anyone who is our enemy. What a great mindset to have. When was it ever okay to kill people? We might be forced to – but that doesn't make it right, and I think there are a lot of American's who think that killing is justified somehow. That somehow it's okay because God wants us to, or that we are allowed. I can't help but think that America has a dangerous mindset that, with a little molding, is waiting to be turned into an out of control war beast. I hope that doesn't happen, I'm just trying to put my hopes in the moral fiber that I believe is inherent in most people, and that eventually everyone will agree on moderate actions and views.
I know I'm on a rant and I'm sorry but I had to let it out. Patriotism does not equal moral irresponsibility, and I'm tired of hearing that it does. URGH That's all I gotta say. Thanks for listening and thanks for posting. -
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What has happened to America? Stop Bush, Stop The Ignorance.
by Morocco ini'm pissed today and i'm about to let it out.
i hope nobody gets offended because these are only opinions.
is anyone else outraged by our president?
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Morocco
Forcher: I appreciate your post. I suppose I do agree with some of the points you make. My post here was made because I'm angry with the world situation. I suppose, too, I have a problem with such an open-ended war like the "War on Terror". This isn't good versus evil, nothing is that simple. Bush lied, plain and simple. He has, and is, abusing his power. I don't think immediately pulling out is the answer, but what we are doing right now isn't either. Bush has made some colossal mistakes and had inflamed the situation to the point of insanity. Again, my opinions, and the reason for my anger. I am, however, curious about something. You mentioned that you disagree with the idea of diplomacy. Why is that? Why do you feel that war is the solution here? I'm not trying to be rude I'm just genuinely curious.