Posts by Nowman

18

I think I'm screwing myself

by nonamegiven in

get your mind out of the gutter, not screwing myself that way haha.. for those that don't know, i'm df'd, trying to get reinstated so i can get family/friends back in my life than fade away faster than the only good radio station you can tune in on a long road trip.

basically, i can't keep my mouth shut.

my mom and i were talking the other day.

Nowman

nonamegiven,

It seems you have alot more to lose (friends/family wise) then I did at the time I left 14 years ago. My parents were the only ones in the org at the time, sure I had very close friendships with many people, but I also had many "worldly" people I knew too. For you, it would be very difficult, you are married, you have family in that cult. Maybe you opening up your mouth to family may not be such a good thing, but its not such a bad thing either. You are damned if you, damned if you don't. My advice would be NOT go back and then fade, it will just turn out the way it is now in my opinion. The way I see it, this is your life right now, we do not know what will happen in our future after death, so why waste so much time? Sure, its dificult, but over time, it gets much better. Also, read your post again, doesn't it seem strange, silly, that you have to go through all that so that family and friends can associate with you? Just because of this religion? This point really gets to me. I read posts of current things going on in the org these days, its so very strange and abnormal. These people are tormenting themselves, I wish they would get a life (I am speaking of those still in the org). But they do not know any better. The latter statement is how I came to forgive my parents for not seeing or speaking to me. Mom, 8 years. Dad, still have not seen him or talked with him in 14 years. Its too bad for him, but not for me. Like I said, it was very hard at first, but overtime, you go on with your life with freedom from the cult, and learn to deal.

Nikki

17

worldly friends as a young jw..

by candidlynuts in

jw
friends

i was reading this thread here http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/10/126156/1.ashx .

regarding child custody "coaching" etc..... and in it is a discussion about kids having "normal" friendships with worldly kids... many of us grew up jw and i was wondering what your personal experience was regarding having worldly friends.. .

.

Nowman

Before 1985, I was allowed to hang out with kids at school, I lived in the city of Chicago at the time. But, in 1985, we moved north to a new congregation. I started going to a new school of course and I was allowed to hang out with kids from school. But, all of a sudden, I was told that I was not allowed to hang out with them anytime out of school. I was devastated, I had close friends. One of my best friends from school actually started to study with me so that we could be together, that was the only time my parents agreed. As I got into my teen years/highschool, it got harder, I lived for going to school to have freedom away from my parents.

It was so strange looking back, I have a 7 and a 9 year old, I love the fact that they get very involved in school and hang out with their friends. Its so special for me because I did not get to do that.

Nikki

55

In Your Opinion, What's The Best Vehicle To Drive?

by minimus in

jw
friends

what is rated the best??

what do you like?

Nowman

I personally love my Nissan Pathfinder (2005), in the spring of 2007, my husband will get a Nissan Maxima (he has a Acura RSX, sporty) but we have a baby on the way in Feb, so he will need a 4-door (mind you, it was his idea to do this).

Big fan of Nissan these days!

Nikki

48

What Did YOU Do At A Typical Witness "Get-Together"?

by minimus in

jw
friends

did you sing kingdumb songs, take turns reading the bible, play bible games or did you have "fun"

Nowman

We had alot of get togethers when I was growing up, at our house alot. We had a ping pong table in our garage, (in the winter, we would heat it) we would all crowd in there. In the summer, I would have volley ball parties too. Bon fire parties, etc. Really, there was no drinking, I really enjoyed myself most of the time because there was always some boy I liked.

Later on though, my parents would not let me go to alot of things after I turned 16, then 2 years later, I left home and the org...

Nikki

15

Favorite Christmas Music

by jayhawk1 in

jw
friends

what is your favorite christmas music?

do you go for the classic stuff?

dr demento stuff perhaps?

Nowman

I love Harry Connick Jr.'s xmas music, big band style. It doesn't hurt either that he himself is pretty sexy.

Nikki

20

For those baptized as a JW/minor, how did you feel on your baptism day?

by Gopher in

jw
friends

i was petrified that day.

i felt nervous and slightly sick that morning, so i couldn't even eat breakfast.. leading up to that baptism day ( i was only 16 ), i didn't want to tell anyone about it.

maybe because i came from a cold-hearted congregation where the other kids my age didn't like me (i was too serious), i didn't want anyone else to know.. i felt relief after the dunking was finally over.

Nowman

I was 15, and I was very excited and nervous. I got baptized at Sportsman Park, in Chicago. When I climbed the steps to the swimming pool, I saw my stepfather, he was surprising me, he was going to baptize me. It actually wan an emotional moment. My parents were so proud of their only child. I have not seen him in 14 years, he is still a JW, so he disowned me. Too bad for him.

Nikki

93

Name only One - one only - the best only!!!!

by AK - Jeff in

jw
friends

your absolute favorite song of all time.

no lists.

just your absolute favorite and artist.. mine:.

Nowman

Sharin the night together by Dr. Hook, reminds of when I was a kid in the early 80s, I had it played at my wedding and I sang the whoe song to my husband on 8/23/03.

Nikki

44

Well its over....

by kerj2leev in

jw
friends

after 13years of marriage, today it finally came to an end!.

it felt very strange as i entered into the court room, my attorney on the right and hers on the left.

we were the first group of 15 or 16 case to be heard today.

Nowman

Kerj,

You will be able to move forward, I know it. Its really too bad, but there are good woman out there (I am sure you know this). You are also a great dad, you took on that responsibility and you will be rewarded.

Nikki

49

DID ANYONE ELSE GET PASSED OVER W/THE KN TRACT?

by juni in

jw
friends

i live in a small, rural town pop.

2000. my daughter and i did not get any visit or tract.. i thought this was supposed to be a final warning - a life saving work.. not complaining, but just curious if you didn't get one.. juni .

Nowman

The JWs came to my door for the 1st time, since I ve lived there for 4 years. I thought it was interesting because she did not tell me that she was a JW, just explained that they were handing out tracts for a special campaign, I said thank you and closed the door. Then I through the tract away, it gave me the willies.

Nikki

65

JW restrictions on sex, lead to over hype that made sex disappointing.

by free2beme in

jw
friends

i remember being a teenager and my hormones were on overdrive.

the young witnesses i knew, male and female, were all feeling the same thing.

we would bring up sex, in one form or another, all the time.

Nowman

I have to start out by responding to the 1st person that started this thread. I too grew up as a JW and was fascinated with sex, I was full of hormones as a teenager, and I facinated about sex all the fricken time. Yet, I never acted on it because I was too afraid. Eventually, I was taken out of public school because I was so boy crazy. My parents never taught me anything about sex, it was very hush hush. Most of my friends were getting married at 18, and how I evied them because they were going to get to have sex, how funny the mind of teenager works (especially a JW mind)!

When I left home at 18, (I was later DFd for fornication but not until 3-4 months later), I had a boyfriend. He was very patient. I felt I loved him but I was so afraid of having sex. Anyway, our 1st time was on New Years Eve. It hurt like hell! But, I knew it was going to get better and boy did it ever. He couldn't keep up with me! (Im not bragging, just seeing the memories).

Anyway, through time and experience and gaining confidence, my sex life had been great up until the point that I felt an eventual non-attraction to my 1st husband. I lost all interest in sex with him, it was terrible. We eventually divorced, we have good relationship now, but I felt it was horrible to stay with someone I was not attracted to anymore, I did not want to have sex with him. Poor guy. I later realized, I was not ready for marriage and "till death do us part", a lifelong commited relationship.

Even though I got married later than JW standards (I never married in the troof), I still was not ready. Three years ago, I married a 2nd time. We have been together for 7 years though, my biggest fear for the longest time was that I was going to get "bored" again, so far it hasn't happened. I think sex is a very important part of a relationship. With my 1st marriage, we did not have sex because I was not attracted to my husband anymore (and by the way, there was no one else). I have found this to be the case with alot of woman, their husbands complain that the wife doesn't want to have sex, and I know the real reason, the wife has lost attraction!

Maybe one of the reasons I was so wishy washy was because of my upbringing, or maybe I am genetically made up this way, who knows. All I know is that getting married later in life, getting many things out of my system, has helped me to be more experienced in bed, and has helped me have a stronger relationship that I WANT to work hard at.

I was probably all over the place, sorry***

Nikki