Posts by Quandry

14

Older people in churches versus older people at the Kingdom Hall

by TooBad TooSad in

on a recent post the poster yadayadda made a comment about the subject that really got me thinking.. i recently attended a "worldly" wedding where there were alot of older people who attend those "pagan".

churches.

it was so good to see how happy they were.

Quandry

Too Bad So Sad

I went back and read many of your posts. I enjoy your wit and take on things. Funny how we could sit and hear the same words over and over for more than thirty years and not run out screaming.

Your question to your wife about the "Special Talk" and if it's so special what does she remember from last year's talk really made me laugh.

Here is a thought from one of your posts:

These older ones did not fear death and no doubt have prepared for their golden years all throughout their life.

The Witnesses are taught and believe that they only have true happiness. They need to be around "worldly"

people, who have faith in God to see what it is really like to be happy,

I recently went to a group meeting of alot of ladies that are from different churches that get together to socialize and just talk about how God has enriched their lives, etc. and found them to be sincere, caring people. It was very emotionally disturbing to me after all those years in the Khall. They really have faith without all the droning on and on about death and destruction of everyone in the world.

Anyway, wanted you to know how much I enjoy your posts and your take on things.

25

Hello there from questioning newbie

by Uncertain in

i m glad i found this board, and i hope i'm welcome here.

i'm a study, maybe a perpetual one.

i'm through the knowledge book and into teach, i'll save my soul and spirit questions for another post.

Quandry

Welcome, uncertain

The things that originally drew me, political neutrality, no tithing lectures, racial indifference (for lack of a better term) and bible study, are still strong for me.

These are the things that originally drew me, also.

If only they hadn't thrown in a few other things.

Like whatever the Faithful and Discreet Slave says (and of course that's the Governing Body of JWs) is straight from God. Only they don't claim to be prophets. Only they are the only channel of truth. And if you don't believe every word from the publications, you will, of course, die at Armageddon. Says them.

Also, please now ask the questions about the origins of the WTS and the first President. Ask now about the WTS involvement in the United Nations-you know-the organization that they publish serves Satan and how we should have no part in it.

In other words, don't jump into the baptismal pool until you are satisfied that you know all you need to, and have all answers to your questions. And, by the way, you'll find out alot here on this forum.

32

Should I tell him how I feel or let it go?

by megsmomma in

jw
friends

brief history: my mom shuns me, my step dad is not a jw but thinks pretty much like one and called me apostate when i tried to tell him some things.

my step dad and i have never been close, he was verbally abusive to me growing up.. well, last week he and my mom fly up my ex- and his wife with my daughter (all jw's) to go boating with them and my sisters kids.

i am glad my daughter got to see her cousins....but, i am sure if they talked about me at all it was not positive talk.

Quandry

I am glad that you vented here and then cooled down and decided not to call back and rage at them.

The hardest but most effective thing to do would be to send a brief card thanking them for paying attention to your daughter, and telling them or at least your mom, how much you love her. Then let it go and say nothing more.

As a mother yourself, you know that this will send arrows straight through her heart if she still has one. Don't you imagine shunning is hard for her? Of course it is, and when you don't respond with anger but love it demonstrates what an unloving act it is, and you can hold your head up because you have not acted in kind.

Like I said, it will be hard........

Hugs to you. Sorry you had to go through this.

38

so let me get this straight

by 4digitcode in

i have been on here for only the past 3 days or so....so i don't really know how it goes.. this is an 'apostate' site right?.

so today i've learned that there is just the ol' regular apostate and an 'active' apostate.. but are there actually active witnesses on this site as well??.

because i just saw a topic about someone asking for advice on how to do a talk?.

Quandry

WELCOME TO THE FORUM.

I am still technically "in" though I do not attend anymore. I guess I am termed stumbled due to the atrociously humiliating way they treated my teen daughter when they disfellowshipped her. False accusations, etc.

I can relate to the way you felt when you first viewed this site. In my case, I put the words Jehovah's Witnesses and Abuse into the computer, and the flood gates opened. I had no idea...........

29

Help needed with 14 year old teenager who has gang (Krips) ties.....

by skeeter1 in

this is long, sorry.

my 14 year old niece came to visit us this week.

she's being raised by her grandparents (ex-jws) and birth mother (ex-jw).

Quandry

Here's a thought. Talk with mom. Don't reveal the girl's conversation with you. Just ask mom if she is aware of some of the pressures of school today that your niece may be facing. You could say she mentioned that there are gangs in the school, without mentioning more confidential info.

Yes, after school programs. Mom needs to sit with and read to the girl. Fun books. Easy books.Then read the books together. Yes, at the same time. It is called paired reading. Then the niece can read the same book back to mom.

The court shows are great that you watched. It made her see what happens in real life. This girl obviously has no role models of success to look at. There are many great magazines for young girls that highlight achievements of young people. Mom needs to visit a library and check out some things. Speaking of libraries, sometimes they have teen nights and programs.

Someone needs to take some real time and effort with this child, because so far, the gangs have stepped up to the plate instead of family.

except MySpace & talking with her friends.

Here's one thing. No MySpace time until homework is done. And a log from the teacher stating what the homework is, so there is no doubt.

I work in a school, and there is nothing more frustrating than seeing potential in a child but knowing that indulgent parents are not there to guide and yes-parent.

25

letter from my parents

by thebiggestlie in

jw
friends

nicholas,.

just want you to know how much dad and i love you.

we love you so much that we dont ever want anything bad to happen to you.

Quandry

My advice to you would be to continue to love and respect your parents. You will be 18 soon and will be able to make more desicions for yourself. Make good desicions. Don't just say: woo hoo, I'm 18, I can do whatever I wish! Get and education, pick friends that compliment your personality, be responsible, grow, learn.

Good advice. Just remember also, that you are a minor until 18 and as such your parents are responsible for you. If you cause some injury to someone, they must pay.

They sound like loving, caring parents, and whether others on this board like it or not, I will just say that unless abuse is involved, they have the right to raise you in the religion they feel is best until you are 18. Just be patient. Use your time to good effect. GET A COLLEGE EDUCATION. This way, you will be able to have a future. This may be hard if you resolutely refuse to obey mom and dad or their directives about going to the Hall. This is something you must think about.

It is hard to be patient and obedient when you are young. But as one who has lived for 55 years, I can tell you, that you only have two parents, and eventually, despite the predictions of the WTS, they will die. Don't make bad decisions now that will haunt you later.

If they invite you to tell you how you feel, then be honest. But still be willing to be obedient.

15

Conversation with a Pioneer and............

by Save My Soul in

i had a conversation with a pioneer at yosemite national park recently.

she was aware that i do not attend the meetings anymore.

in the past she did not speak to me, but now she did.

Quandry

She said I was right 20 years ago when I stopped pioneering and started a career. She mentioned how EVERYONE in the hall demeaned me because of my decision at 19, but now it appears I made the right one.

Many in the org. seem to feel hopeless that the world is still going on and the end has not come. No education, no medical, no 401k, just a green bible.

How utterly sad for this woman. She must be well along in years now and feel that she cannot go back and undo the years, and that if she left now she would have no friends, maybe no family, etc.

I wish I'd left twenty years ago, becuse at 55 it is hard to undo the years and now I have no education, no career, no money, no 401K, no retirement, and threw the green Bible out.

24

Experiences at the meetings

by slimboyfat in

jw
friends

since i still go to meetings i am going to post some thoughts about what i see and hear to refresh apostate memories of what glorious experiences you are missing out on these days.

yesterday we had the book study, the boredom of the study itself was only alleviated by two incidents, one sad and the other strange.... there is a sister who is bi-polar and comes infrequently who was there.

she was called to give an answer and started crying into the microphone.

Quandry

She gets about 4 feet from the stage when two mic boys come from nowhere to tackle her. Well amongst all the commotion my Dad jumps up and runs in on it, he was one of the more physically strong brothers in the hall. So they are dragging her out the whole time she is screaming nonsense or truth about the brother being of Satan and her doing Jehovah's will trying to destroy him.

Wow!

Now, see, if meetings were interesting like that more often, people would stay awake and attendance would be up!!!

So dad can now make dual use of the KHall-meetings and a workout!!

55

DO NOT CONTINUE SENDING EMAILS TO ME OR ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ME OR MY FAMILY.

by esw1966 in

jw
friends

isn't it 'nice' to finally get letters from home!?????.

this is the entire letter written to me by my sister:.

"do not continue sending emails to me or attempt to contact me or my family.".

Quandry

esw1966,

I'll try this again. I do agree with the posters. Let her think about the last words she ever "spoke" to you.

Well, maybe the last words. Because as I've read some of the posts from others here, it seems that when family problems such as ill health arrive, and family members need some help, guess what? Those apostate relatives just might come in handy! So, you never know what the future will hold. Just be there and at that time show the brotherly love that you've felt all along.

By the way, Frank, I must tell you that your post is terribly upsetting. Please know that I feel for you and for your mother. What she has done to herself is awful, and deep inside she cannot be a happy person. The same goes for you if your mom needs real care, they may be contacting you. After all, they will not see to her needs on a regular basis.

It seems that as time goes by, many are leaving the borg, but the ones that stay are rabid defenders willing to die for men who do not care about them in return.

22

Hello people, :)!

by Littledreamfaery in

jw
friends

ahh i suppose after posting a bit its time to say hello.

hello people, all of you :).

who am i, well i'm the middle child of my parents, who are ex jw's, so i'm not sure if that makes me one since they stopped attending jw occasions when i was 11, but having experienced being part of it, and having not enjoyed it i can say i class myself as an ex-jw.

Quandry

Welcome!! Glad to know that you are in college with what is sure to be a bright future ahead. I know that you will gain fulfillment as a contributing member to society.