Posts by dobby

4

Another baby? How do I decide...

by dobby in

i want another child, it's just that simple.

i have one and we are past the rocky early years and now i am thinking of another one.. however, my heart and my mind are in conflict.

how do you decide whether or not it's in the best interest of your family to add another member?.

dobby

I should say that I have not reached the "mid-life" point by any means.

The problem is that we had originally planned to have two children so that our children could have a brother or sister. When the orignal plan was made I thought the end of the world was coming and that my biggest concern in raising them would be their spirituality, not saving for college.

It is with a new outlook on life and firsthand experience at child raising that I am second guessing my plan. Kids are expensive, true, but they also require alot of time, energy and sacrifice on the part of the parent. The rewards of child raising, however sweet, will not fill a void in your soul - I know that.

However, any child brought into our family is going to be loved, encouraged and supported. He or she will be getting two loyal and dedicated parents. These are things money can't buy.

Anyway, my point is that this is not a fleeting thought or a way for me to fill any void in my life. I am too tough mentally for that - which is why I could make the hard decision to not have another child if my mind wins this debate.

4

Another baby? How do I decide...

by dobby in

i want another child, it's just that simple.

i have one and we are past the rocky early years and now i am thinking of another one.. however, my heart and my mind are in conflict.

how do you decide whether or not it's in the best interest of your family to add another member?.

dobby

I want another child, it's just that simple. I have one and we are past the rocky early years and now I am thinking of another one.

However, my heart and my mind are in conflict. How do you decide whether or not it's in the best interest of your family to add another member?

My angst in making this decision is directly related to growing up a witness. Because I didn't go to college, save for my future and just generally plan my life around a family, I am concerned that financially and emotionally I can not have another child.

I am afraid I won't be able to afford a second child, including saving for college while I make up for lost years saving for my retirement. I don't think I will be able to afford the daycare for two kids. And I can't quit my job, I need to have a steady paycheck, benefits, 401k. And I am afraid of trying to hold down a job with two kids, double the potential sick leave I may need.

Emotionally, I am just beginning to live. I am afraid that I will lose myself forever if I have another child. I have not taken the time to discover who I am, to find a job a really love, a true calling in life. And although I am relatively young, I am phyiscally drained from years of working, meetings, field service, etc. I need to heal, become healthy and maybe in 3 or 4 years, (having only one child), I can take the risk of quitting my job and going to school full-time.

Yet it broke my heart the other day, as I packed away clothes my son has outgrown, I pictured another little boy wearing them, running across the room to me, his chubby arms and hands outstretched and his little voice calling "mommy".

I am sick over this decision, does anyone have any advice?

6

Story: I get to compete

by Jim_TX in

as most know, competition as a jw was a taboo thing.

i remember growing up - in grade school, and having to turn down many opportunities that may have helped me later in life - opportunities that involved 'competing', or receiving 'recognition'.

oh, minor things like an invitation to be on the national junior honor society, seniors' honors night, and h.s.

dobby

Thanks for sharing that story Jim, it was beautifully written.

It's so sad that we did not get a chance to develop our natural talents and abilites growing up as witnesses. Especially in sports, kids learn such valuable lessons about teamwork and discipline. It's such a good feeling too, to work hard and excel at something it makes you feel as if you can accomplish anything and gives you tremondous self-esteem.

I am glad you got to experience that feeling as a teenager, if only for one day.

13

A happy people?

by myself in

jw
friends

viewing the tennesseans article today "disfellowship described as being 'worse then death'" one of my co-workers asked if this was true.. i told him that many have viewed it that way in different aspects.

some have been driven to suicide because of not knowing how to deal with the prospect of being df'd.

they are cut off from their family, and the only people they have really been allowed to associate with as friends.. this brought out a question from my husband on the way home from work tonight: "are jehovah's witnesses really a happy group of people?".

dobby

I think the majority are not happy and I have noticed so many witnesses are really depressed. But no wonder when you consider the stuff they are told.

I remember a talk when a CO told us: if you are comfortable and you are not struggling-something is wrong with your life. we are not to be comfortable in this system, we must be self sacrificing and exert ourselves vigourously or we will become complacent and risk losing everlasting life.

Translation: Get the hell out there and find new members you lazy fools or you will die die die.

It's one thing to sacrifice something for someone we love or to help a stranger in need, it's another thing to beat yourself up to the point you have no joy in life. Even those who chose a life of complete servitude (i.e. Mother Theresa) keep on doing it because it makes them happy not because of fear or destruction or as a cure for depression.

12

Brainwash Your Children From Infancy

by DakotaRed in

jw
friends

from the new theocratic ministry school book, page 16, we read:.

training children to listen.

christian parents can help their children--even infants--to become.

dobby

Amen Reborn

I totally relate - 3rd generation myself - you just described my life and choices.

Excellent summary.

12

Brainwash Your Children From Infancy

by DakotaRed in

jw
friends

from the new theocratic ministry school book, page 16, we read:.

training children to listen.

christian parents can help their children--even infants--to become.

dobby

Dakota -

not only being raised as a dub is bad, but so is being a parent of a baby and toddler.

Before my child was born I did so much research on child development, etc - so that I allowed my baby and later toddler to have books and quiet toys during meetings AND i took him out of the meetings, let him play in the back rooms and outside. Let him eat animal crackers once in the library (hee hee the beginnnings of rebellion).

Well...as you can imagine we had a few talks that may have been 'specially prepared for me. Contrast that to a "model couple" around my age who had an extremely well behaved child- why you may ask? Because they mercilessly pinched, slapped and covered her mouth from the time she was 4 months old to teach her to be quiet and sit still.

That poor baby - I hope she gives 'em hell later.

11

The Society's Plan: An Overview

by metatron in

jw
friends

the watchtower's leaders know that storm clouds.

are forming above their corrupted heads - and they have.

formulated a response.. first, tons of emphasis on armageddon - rabble rousing.

dobby

This is a very interesting post. They are becoming more and more of a mind control organization and at the same time trying to become more attractive to the mainstream - more emphasis on respecting the GB, etc, while at the same time possibly changing the stand on blood.

It's just so obvious major re-inventing is happening as we speak - they are morphing - hoping for another century of profitability - and a new wave of members from a new generation of uneducated, disilliusioned, lost, impoverished, beaten down souls.

When I read a post like this I feel so angry. I am so disgusted by people like this. All weekend I have felt such of mixture of tears and bitterness thinking about this organization, the time me and millions have wasted and the unhealthy results of being a part of them. I think of how differently my life may have turned out - and I haven't suffered near what so many have.

Thank you metatron and other posters that tirelessly keep us updated on the lastest. We have to keep their evil history alive - they can't be allowed to squirm from the hands of accountability.

1

Same Sh*t, different pile

by Jigrigger in

jw
friends

here's a quote from a loyal lds.

note the similarities to the jw rhetoric when such a discussion takes place.... dear brothers and sisters,.

i firmly believe that the crisis in the catholic church is a prophecy of god and that the "great and abominable church will fall".

dobby

Chillingly similiar to JW thinking. Excellent post.

1

WTS Investments

by dobby in

jw
friends

being new to the board this may have already been discussed.... however, has anyone researched and found any information on investments made by the wt corporation in companies that produce or are trying to develop blood substitutes and/or medical devices for bloodless surgery or hospitals specializing in bloodless surgery?

this seems like a no-brainer that they would be heavily invested into this - however very hard to prove without access to wtc finances.. i saw an article on another board regarding a company called biopure and the blood substitute they are trying to develop - hemopure.. what do you want to bet they have a "few" shares of this company?

i suppose if you approached them as the owner of a drug development company looking for seed money to develop a new blood subsitute, you might be able to get some information - and recoup some of your losses from years of unpaid service:)

dobby

Being new to the board this may have already been discussed...

however, Has anyone researched and found any information on investments made by the WT corporation in companies that produce or are trying to develop blood substitutes and/or medical devices for bloodless surgery or hospitals specializing in bloodless surgery? This seems like a no-brainer that they would be heavily invested into this - however very hard to prove without access to WTC finances.

I saw an article on another board regarding a company called Biopure and the blood substitute they are trying to develop - Hemopure.
What do you want to bet they have a "few" shares of this company?

I suppose if you approached them as the owner of a drug development company looking for seed money to develop a new blood subsitute, you might be able to get some information - and recoup some of your losses from years of unpaid service:)

9

JW needs another disaster!

by astroboy in

jw
friends

i'm a new poster and i know this subject has been touched on many times before after 911, but its amazing that a terrorist act that killed so many seemed to inject a little spark in many jws.

my jw brother (mini-servant) called the morning of the disaster and his first words to me was "i'm glad i'm on jehovah's side!

"...duh what does jehovah got to do with that!

dobby

I was still hanging around JW's trying to go to meetings after 911.

One person said

" I am just so grateful that Jah let 911 happen. It just reminded me of how close to the end we are."

I looked at her in shock and disbelief and thought "why the hell is this person my friend?" I think of that comment often when I think of my decision to leave - good decision!