Oh god - I am so mental. I have been on anti-anxiety or anti-depressants since I was 17. My doctor has always felt it was situational rather than biological. Situational - due to the stress and bullshit from the religion that impacted me directly (rumours, gossip) and indirectly (my parents being 3rd generation controlling whack-jobs). Btw, every member of my immediate family is on some kind of anti-depressant.
sundawn77
JoinedPosts by sundawn77
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17
Jehovah`s Witness`s Mental illness Epidemic!
by OUTLAW inthis disease is running rampant among jehovah`s witness`s..theres not one that dosen`t have it.it seems to be contagious.my mom has it,my dad had it,my brother has it,all the jehovah`s witness`s i know have it..an incredible loss of memory,a mental deterioration that can happen instantly!..it has nothing to do with every day life memory loss,like "alzhiemer`s"..it is loss of memory about thier own religion and only affects jehovah`s witness`s..it`s "jozhiemer`s disease"..have you,or do you know anyone who has a loss of memory about their own religion because of "jozhiemer`s disease?
"...outlaw
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Would U Pray To God Under ANY Circumstances???
by minimus ineven if you say you're not a believer in "god", if something bad was happening, would you ever give it a shot, and ask (jehovah) god for help??
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sundawn77
I definitely do. And I do pray to Jehovah, because that's how I know God. But I do NOT pray to him from a Jehovah's Witness perspective.
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Okay, here's my story.
by sundawn77 inhey all.. first of all i want to say that i am really impressed by the warm atmosphere that this board provides.
i remember when i was little and we learned about non-witnesses, and they were portrayed as children-eating, blood-drinking criminals.
okay, i exaggerate, but the connotations were there!.
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sundawn77
I really am not trying to make myself out to be a saint. Because I sure am not. I love my parents and want them in my life, which is part of the problem of why I am depressed. But they are willfully ignorant of what I try to tell them and believe that this control tactic is what is best. Blahhhhh.
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Okay, here's my story.
by sundawn77 inhey all.. first of all i want to say that i am really impressed by the warm atmosphere that this board provides.
i remember when i was little and we learned about non-witnesses, and they were portrayed as children-eating, blood-drinking criminals.
okay, i exaggerate, but the connotations were there!.
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sundawn77
Hee.
Yeah, I hit Enter right off the bat and it posted it. Me so smrt.
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30
Okay, here's my story.
by sundawn77 inhey all.. first of all i want to say that i am really impressed by the warm atmosphere that this board provides.
i remember when i was little and we learned about non-witnesses, and they were portrayed as children-eating, blood-drinking criminals.
okay, i exaggerate, but the connotations were there!.
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sundawn77
Hey all.
First of all I want to say that I am really impressed by the warm atmosphere that this board provides. I remember when I was little and we learned about non-witnesses, and they were portrayed as children-eating, blood-drinking criminals. Okay, I exaggerate, but the connotations were there!
I'm 24, and I'm single, and I have been away for 3 years. My parents got married in 1975, and believed that Armageddon would come that year. In fact, my father was persuaded to drop out of university (he was taking hospital administration, which apparently "wouldn't be useful" in Armageddon) to take a job as a construction worker (which would be ever so useful in the new system). So you can imagine how our financial situation was growing up. Absolute hell. Mom worked as a secretary before my sisters and I were born, but they couldn't afford daycare on dad's salary so she stayed home. These are two people who were top of their class in high school (mom was voted "most likely to be successful), reduced to living on hardly anything.
Because we were poor, our wealthy congregation often snubbed us. Make that mostly snubbed us. I remember after the Memorial every year there would be masses of people going to some elder's house and we would not be invited. I still can't figure it out. What was wrong with us? I know now that there was nothing wrong with us, but we were just not part of that extensive group of families in our circuit whose companies fed off of each other; making them all extremely wealthy. There were many families in the 7-figure income bracket in our region, and everybody knew it. Mom and Dad both became depressed, because they felt that they were doing something wrong and so "Jehovah was not blessing them".
The trouble began when my older sister was about 12. She began to be bullied by the kids in our hall; they would laugh at her and make sure that she knew about the parties that were going on that she wasn't invited to. The congregations would put on those hellish dances and she would be the only one not asked to dance, in front of everyone and their parents. Naturally this contributed to her having immense self-esteem problems that have continued until today (she is 28 now). She tried through her teen years to fit in, and as I grew older I remember how absolutely used she would be by those kids, who would be chosen to give demonstrations and yet would drive by our house in cars and honk to let my sister know that she was not invited to whatever party they were on their way to.
When I was 19 or so, I finally began to date (I guess I was pretty enough to have my poor background overlooked, at first anyways). However, I made the mistake of breaking up with one guy and dating another one a few months later. That's right, I dated 2 guys. And I became known as the biggest slut in our circuit. I was screamed at, called a whore and a skank, shunned completely from social gatherings and the craziest stories about my "sexual misconduct" began to circulate. Going to the elders would have just made it worse for me, so I dumped the guy and kept my head down. The silly part is that the farthest I went with both of those guys was kissing. Why are JW girls so vicious?
At this point I decided to take the scholarship I won from University and go to school. The pinched faces of the elders and their wives at the hall made me feel awful, yet this seed of defiance in me was growing and I genuinely liked school. I was meeting normal people and they were amazing. They thought I was nice and smart and funny and didn't care about who my parents were or what my spiritual standing was. Best of all, they didn't think that I was a loser for not being married yet!
Then, I met my boyfriend. The second I saw him I knew that I was going to love him. And I do. Trouble is...he was Catholic (the devil's religion ). Not a practicing one, but a Catholic all the same. And that's when the trouble started. After a year, I slept with him because I loved him and I was...uh...normal? But i was trying to live both lives and it was killing me. So for some reason, I told my mother (who I am close to), and she insisted that I tell the elders. To her credit, I don't think that she thought the elders would react like they did. The Judicial Committee was awful. Horrible. The questions they asked... Were the lights on or off? Did you use a condom? You did? So you planned to have sex? Where were you? What position did you use? Where did he touch you? How many times did you do it? They asked me that one at least 3 or 4 times throughout the meetings, like they were trying to get me to admit that I'm a dirty whore who did it twice. Which we did. But I knew that while once was forgivable, twice meant you're out. My parents would have been heartbroken if I was DF'd. So I lied through my teeth through all those meetings with those men in suits, who glared at me and humiliated me in a locked, windowless conference room. They reproved me, as I knew they would, on the condition that I would dump my boyfriend. They made me promise it. I promised, walked out, and never went back.
Thanks to the Witnesses, I have parents who tell me repeatedly that they are disappointed in me and can never unconditionally love me, even though I've begged them for that so many times that at one point I drove myself to the ER because I knew I was going to kill myself. I am financially independent, have bailed them out financially, skipped grades, won a scholarship, have 2 degrees with honors, and I volunteer all over the community. And they still tell me they are disappointed in me. So I cry in the shower because I can't win; I can't be a JW and dead inside for them. I have to be myself. Do these feelings ever go away? Will I ever make them see that I'm a good person? Please help me.
Thanks for listening,
Sundawn
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What scary stories were you told?
by sundawn77 ini'm new here; i "faded away" 3 years ago.
i'll tell my story soon when it's not so hard to think about.. i'm just wondering what stories other people were told about demons that ensured that nobody watched scary movies or listened to certain music (in my case, stevie nicks, go figure).
elders and my friends' parents, and other kids in the congregation all had stories of people watching movies and waking up to see a demon in their room!
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sundawn77
I'm new here; I "faded away" 3 years ago. I'll tell my story soon when it's not so hard to think about.
I'm just wondering what stories other people were told about demons that ensured that nobody watched scary movies or listened to certain music (in my case, Stevie Nicks, go figure). Elders and my friends' parents, and other kids in the congregation all had stories of people watching movies and waking up to see a demon in their room! Or buying a picture frame, for example, from a flea market only to have it float around a room. What the hell is this about? Scare tactics? When I was a teenager, I was so afraid of the dark; petrified that I was going to wake up and see something... My little sister (who is 21) is still afraid. What do you think?
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JW Wedding - Saturday
by Zico ini'm going to a jw wedding on saturday.
the groom is 20, and the bride is 22. .
a bit young this, don't you think?
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sundawn77
Where I live 20 is ancient! Almost all of my friends got married at 18 or 19; some even got married at 17. Many were engaged in high school. I'm 24, and most definitely viewed as an old maid. I know for a fact that some blame my fading away and dating non-witness guys on not getting a Witness husband. Laughable, but at the same time mildly annoying.
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The book of Revelation, the word of God, or one hell of a drug trip?
by free2beme inwhat more confusing and off the wall book in the bible, can there be, then the book of revelation.
it has all sort of odd things being talked about, all sorts of weird events that seem to only be connected when you twist the mind to the maximum of your imagination.
so many people, in religions, have tried to explain this off the wall book and yet refuse to face the fact that it might just be complete imagination of nonsense.
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sundawn77
I dunno. I'm of the opinion still that Revelations actually does mean something....just not what witnesses believe. Well, not the everybody-but-us-is-going-to-die parts anyways.
When I left, I didn't leave God, I just left those people. That's why I'm frustrated because I want to know what the bible REALLY means but not from an organized religion point of view.
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What name would like to see for the "2007 District Convention"?
by new boy inthere many to choose from --------------how about .
" millions now living will soon be dead" (with no hope of a resurrection)--------------that means your unbaptized freinds and family members.
"how we have created god in our image" (jealous, hatedful, petty).
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sundawn77
1." Millions now living will soon be dead"
Heehee hee. Thank you for making my day. :)
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whats the action plan for armogedon
by pippy injust wondering what the dubs will do if they think that armogedon is really starting... will they run for the hills,,, will they tape up their windows and stay inside with their 3 months worth of stored food??
will the elders one day anounce a secret location for them to all go to immediatly without telling any unbelievers where they are going???
i am always scared that one day my parents will disappear and i wont know how to rescue them ... though i spose if i was to rescue them , i should be doing it now ,, not sure they would come out happy at the end of the day though, so what do u do!!
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sundawn77
Every time I read how detailed the plan is for Armageddon I get freaked out again. I'm so tired of this nagging feeling in the back of my brain that is telling me that I am going to be Soooorrrrryyyyyyyy.... (it sounds like my mother's voice). Does that feeling ever go away? Is there ever a moment when you do not feel afraid? I've been gone for 3 years (although I have a feeling a Judicial Committee will be called about me soon) and I still wake up in night sweats. :(