Oh, that brings back a ton of flashbacks in my days of being a JW-to-be (not so fast). I got so used to being marked, that I did stuff just to piss people off. I got to a point that I even got proud of being the kingdom hall pariah. Soon after I walked out; I just got tired of not being good enough for their stupid rules and regulations, and a better way to live. I am so grateful for all the marks they inflicted on me. I am free!!
Atpeaceatlast
JoinedPosts by Atpeaceatlast
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46
NEWBIE- MARKING TALK
by Tallman64 innewbie here.
i feel i will enjoy my stay.
interesting talk last nite on marking.
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30
Can/Should someone be in love with more than one person?
by AK - Jeff innot a question that affects me personally - i am dutifully bound to a single woman now for 33 years [omg that is 1/3 of a century already].. but do you believe that it is possible or profitalble to fall in love with more than one person at the same time?
in western culture it is normally considered 'betrayal' to do such a thing - but thoughout history and in cultures outside of the west today - it is considered acceptable, even normal.. typically it is the man who has more love interests than just one - not the woman - but some cultures have supported multiple partners for women also.
this is not a thread about judging others - just an inquiry about opinion.
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Atpeaceatlast
I don't think it's about if you should or shouldn't when it comes to the matters of the heart, but I will always love the JW boy I left behind, although I will never return to him in an "Eros" or marital arrangement. My husband and I love each other on a day-to-day basis, and I would never have an affair with the JW boy if are paths ever crossed again. For me, it's not about if I love one, I can't love another, and also it's not about which one is better and the other inferior. It doesn't work that way for me, at least. Each love you come across in this life is different; The JW boy is the first love, the first true heartbreak; the memory of young love blooming furiously and then betrayedl due to the Watchtower's antics. Years later, I met my husband at a time I was ready to love again after healing. My husband is my friend and my family, and I couldn't imagine my life without him in it. I guess love can be complicated, but for some, a heart is something that truly has a mind of it's own.
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Should I?
by Atpeaceatlast ini've been thinking about contacting the jw boy i was involved with 22 years ago.
i don't know why exactly, except that i need some explanations from him, meaning, why did he behave the way he did after our separate jcs.
i guess i need closure.
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Atpeaceatlast
LOL, I'm glad to see everyone has a great sense of humor. No, he doesn't owe me money, just the millions' worth of tears I shed while he looked the other way but that was another lifetime ago, and I'm not stressing over it, but since I'm not the girl I used to be as a JW wannabe (ick, I can't believe I was trying to be one), I guess I would like to have the chance to confront him and ask him a ton of questions as the assertive, gothgal that I am now (hee, hee). No, I wouldn't be quiet that's for sure, but seriously, all of you have made some very good points and I will take them into consideration, although I have a good life now, so why worry about it, right?
Thank you!
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Should I?
by Atpeaceatlast ini've been thinking about contacting the jw boy i was involved with 22 years ago.
i don't know why exactly, except that i need some explanations from him, meaning, why did he behave the way he did after our separate jcs.
i guess i need closure.
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Atpeaceatlast
I, too, believe in karma, and what goes around, comes around. I know God was looking out for me the day I left everything behind. If I do contact him, I'll post and let you know what happened.
Thanks for the advice.
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Should I?
by Atpeaceatlast ini've been thinking about contacting the jw boy i was involved with 22 years ago.
i don't know why exactly, except that i need some explanations from him, meaning, why did he behave the way he did after our separate jcs.
i guess i need closure.
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Atpeaceatlast
I've been thinking about contacting the JW boy I was involved with 22 years ago. I don't know why exactly, except that I need some explanations from him, meaning, why did he behave the way he did after our separate JCs. I guess I need closure. I know this much: He lives in Cedar Lake, IN, married, still a JW in the Crown Point, IN congregation. I'm not looking for a love reconnection since I have a wonderful husband in my life. I have asked my husband about it and he said that if I needed the closure, then go ahead. What do you think? Can anyone help? Thank you.
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46
Would you EVENTUALLY be happy in a JW dominated new system?
by JH inmany here say that they wouldn't want to live in a world dominated by jw's.
i understand.. i know that i wasn't always happy under their rules and way of living.
i don't like going to meetings, especially 5 a week.
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Atpeaceatlast
Many years ago, when I made the decision not be baptized and they told me that I was condemned and I would die for sure, right then and there I made it my goal to pursue my own paradise and my own form of eternal life by living a good and honest life, have a family, have a wonderful marriage, create my art and embrace new and exciting adventures, and love and forgive freely.
This question is one I gave a lot of thought over the years, and I would say with absolute conviction that I would rather die than subjugate myself to the JWs. As a woman, the stifling male-dominated paradise they would create would make me a fugitive of their laws as I would never abide by them. And, let's not forget no free expression, no free thought, no creativity, no honest debating on any issue. In essence, the Dark Ages for all eternity. No, I would rather be dead. Once I am dead, I won't know anything. I'll be non-existent. I have no fear in that, but if I lived in that world, I would always be running and always being in fear.
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ANYTHING EXCITING EVER HAPPEN AT YOUR KINGDOM HALL?
by anewme indid anything exciting or alarming ever happen at your hall?
i remember only funny incidents, like one brother getting up there with his zipper down.
(i knew alot of brothers after that felt no shame to actually check down there before going up on the podium!
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Atpeaceatlast
Yes, in the summer of '86 a young brother came to the meeting drunk and and unkempt. Needless to say the brothers dragged him out of the kingdom hall. He was rumored to be going through rough times. Actually, I knew. He was my friend and had a drinking problem. He also told me he had his worldly girlfriend pregnant. It was gossip fodder for weeks. Of course, rumors about us being friends were around, so the elders interrogated me about his behavior; I learned from my previous JCs to keep my mouth shut, so I said I have no idea. It would have been Christlike and compassionate if they would have talked to him and help him out, but no, they just disfellowshipped him. It's always about keeping appearances. Sadly, I found out many years later he had committed suicide in '92. I feel very bad about this particular incident since I didn't get to say goodbye to him when I left in '88. May he rest in peace.
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I went to the Memorial.
by RichieRich ini'm just going to start at the beginning.. i was anticipating the memorial all day.
i was nervous but excited, kind of like standing in line for a roller coaster.. ok. so erika gets ready at her house, and i get ready at mine.
i'm wearing a black suit with a light green shirt, and a tie that had hues of green and yellow in it.
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Atpeaceatlast
Well, every year that passes since my exile, I have thought about going back to Indiana to the congregation where the boy I was involved with to see how things are still the same and add a little excitement to his and his family's dull life as JWs by showing up for the memorial in a hot red suit and then walk out and drive away. It's a strong urge, but so far, I haven't. Sometimes I believe that the devil or the same evil force that compel me to run is trying to drag me back.
I'm glad that for this year I didn't go.
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Atpeaceatlast
From JWs:
I learned fear and prejudice.
I learned to smile even though I wanted to cry.
I learned to be someone other than my true self.
I learned to lie.
I learned that my JW boyfriend was a bigger screw up than I was.
I learned that if you don't accept their version of The Truth, they condemn you to death.
Oh yeah, I learned to sell.
Once I left the JWs:
I learned to never, ever, enter a KH again.
I learned that the bible is only a book and not from any god.
I learned and lived to tell the truth about the JW world.
I learned to be myself and not feel guilty once I was away from the JW clutches.
I learned that I could never be happy with a JW man so I married worldly men instead.
I learned to keep my daughter away from JWs.
I learned that I'm going to die anyway, but at least I'll die free.
And, I learned to hate to sell anything I didn't believe in!
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46
How did you dispose of your JW books? (Or did you?)
by exwitless inlittle drummer boy and i have a small house and we do not have room for the wasted space all of these books are creating.
here's a brief rundown of what we have:.
several nwt hardcover bibles, chinese bibles (lots of chinese students in our town), insight on the scriptures, concordances, a few bound volumes, song books, km books, reasoning books, the entire bible on audio tape, and more.
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Atpeaceatlast
One week before I was to get married (August 20, 1988), I solemnly stood in front of the years' worth of literature and stared unemotionally at them for quite a while before I placed them in the garbage can. I was leaving for a new life in Florida with a non-JW man and I wanted to give my old life a "funeral" by getting rid of the memories of what was and could have been my life as a JW woman. Although my heart was broken and my spirit crushed by the events of the previous three years (father died of colon cancer, judicial committees, lost friends, lost JW boyfriend, wearing the scarlet letter of being a sexual suspect, only true JW friend committed suicide, my fading, the subsequent harassment, living in Chicago to get away from them and him, finding a man who paid attention to me at a time when I was down a path of self destruction...), I knew my old life had to die in order for me to survive all that pain. Looking back, I'm a totally different person and getting rid of the literature was very cleansing for me in order to "resurrect" to a new life in Florida.