Paralipomenon

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Posts by Paralipomenon

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  40

  Would you rat out an Elder

  by pratt1 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this weekend i accompanied a few friends to a strip club in manhattan.

  my wife doesn't like it too much, but since i promised her that a lap dance is asfar as i will go with a stripper, she tolorates it.. imagine my surprise when i noticed that an elder from my old congo was there along with several of his co-workers.. he tried to ignore me but before we left i stopped by his table and said hello.. he actually had the nerve to ask me if it was okay for us to speak.

  i said since we were both in a strip club, it didn't matter.. my question - should i mention this to dubs i still maintain relationships with, who incidently worship the ground this elder walks on?.

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  Paralipomenon

  I agree with not ratting him out.
  
  I would make a piercing comment to him though, something like "I hope you remember I didn't make a big deal out of this the next time you're thinking about shunning me"
  
  Then invite him to go with you some other time.
  
  You don't water seeds of doubt with bricks.
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  43

  Update: Elders on the move....

  by drew sagan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well everybody, i think a little update is in order here with what is going on in my world.

  much has happened, and it appears that much more is going to happen quite quickly.

  for those of you that don't know, the poster amber rose is my wife.

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  Paralipomenon

  You could state that your wife joined a group for that claims to be for "Young Men". Reasoning that they are as much a "Christian" organization now as they are exclusively for "Young Men"
  
  The article that cautioned about joining one was also printed in a time where blood fractions were a disfellowshipping offense. You can have a good chuckle with the elders on how much the organization has changed in 25 odd years and say that your conscience is fine with being a member of a gym.
  
  They may bring that there are "mythical others" that may be stumbled by her actions. You can bring up the scripture about not letting the sun set with you in a provoked state and ask the elders if any "other" person looks to be stumbled, encourage them to come talk to you so you can reason with them.
  
  Desperate fall back would be the ol' "millstone around your neck" if your actions stumble another. Again you can repeat the above and say that each person is responsible for their own faith. Jesus said in his sermon that unless you ate his flesh and drank his blood there was no salvation. Many murmured and walked away. Does that make Jesus bloodguilty?
  
  If they press the issue, you can ask if they are there representing someone claiming to be stumbled. If they say "yes" ask for the name so you can talk to them, if they say "no" then you can say that there's no worry of any millstones then.
  
  That's about all the angles I can think of that they'd try. During my sheparding call they wanted to do the encouragement talk about how great the meetings are and how that is the only place Jehovah's spirit is. I just noded, smiled and agreed with them. They also offered a bible study. When they tried that with me I said "Do I need to get rebaptised after missing so many meetings?" They said no and told them that I was current on my magazine reading and didn't feel I would benefit from a study. I had prepared before time with the most current magazine that had just come out.
  
  I asked them what they thought of the article in "[super new great WT magazine]" they confessed they hadn't read it yet. I encouraged them to check it out as it was very faithbuilding and assured them that I'd be a regular back at the meetings when my work schedule settled down and I kicked this pesky depression.
  
  They left and never tried again.
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  36

  EMERGENCY! Need some ideas

  by Satans little helper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so tomorrow is mrs slh's birthday and i need an imaginative idea for a present around $50.

  she loves neckalces, handgabs and shoes so i've bought her loads of those.

  i'm looking for something a bit more imaginative and i am stacked out at work today so don't have the time to trawl the net for ideas.

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  Paralipomenon

  For next year, or anniversary you can get her a golden rose:
  
  http://www.theforeverrose.com/maingold.htm
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  99

  ANYTHING EXCITING EVER HAPPEN AT YOUR KINGDOM HALL?

  by anewme in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  did anything exciting or alarming ever happen at your hall?

  i remember only funny incidents, like one brother getting up there with his zipper down.

  (i knew alot of brothers after that felt no shame to actually check down there before going up on the podium!

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  Paralipomenon

  At an assembly during the talk there were attendants scuttling all over the place. Then one brother goes up, takes off his jacket and goes underneath the platform.
  
  He's down there for about 20 mins then comes out and goes away. I figured they were having issues with sound connectivity. Then they stop the assembly and a brother goes up and explains there has been a bomb threat.
  
  We are all instructed to gather up everything we have from our seats and they provide instructions for evacuating the stadium. It is blistering hot outside and any little piece of shade was taken up. We wait for about a couple hours then are told we'll be going back in.
  
  In order to get back in, you needed to display an assembly name tag or be with someone that could vouch for you.
  
  We all go back in are commended on evacuating the stadium in a orderly fashion and in fact, it was the fastest evacuation ever. Hail Jehovah!
  
  It hits the papers the next day that we were all evacuated and everyone was pissed because it was a short article that just stated the session was interrupted and it took over 2 hours to get everyone back in. Obviously Satan worked for the newpapers.
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  43

  Update: Elders on the move....

  by drew sagan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well everybody, i think a little update is in order here with what is going on in my world.

  much has happened, and it appears that much more is going to happen quite quickly.

  for those of you that don't know, the poster amber rose is my wife.

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  Paralipomenon

  I think this meeting would just be a Shepparding call. Joining the YMCA might just be a sign that you're spiritually weak.
  
  You could force them to tip their hand when scheduling the meeting. Ask them what it's about. They will try every means possible to avoid telling you before the actual meeting.
  
  You can rightly get a bit annoyed with their avoidance and ask if they have an ulterior motive. Personally I love to accuse people that are trying to hide something of something much larger. Usually they have rehearsed all their replies to keep control of the conversation, so I like to toss them off guard and watch them collapse.
  
  For example, if they are being evasive you could say "You're just looking for an excuse to come see my wife aren't you? I've seen how you've looked at her at the hall!"
  
  Takes a steel set of balls to pull that one off, but I can assure you that if you do that and he starts to stammer you can hang up the phone indignantly and the brother will do one of two things:
  
  1) drop the issue out of embarrassment
  2) get another brother to call to calm you down who would understand if you are avoid them
  
  Have fun with it, cult programmed people are a blast to mess with.
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  44

  What to do when your parents are toxic?

  by Paralipomenon in

  1. social
  2. family

  from reading people's stories and life experiences i thought i'd poll the members here for some advice.

  my inlaws are extremely toxic.

  i know, every person says that about their inlaws, but the way they treat their family is absolutely horrible.

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  Paralipomenon

  Thanks for the input all.
  
  Last night on the way home from work, I stopped into a book store and picked up a copy of "Toxic Parents" for my wife.
  
  I come in the door and my wife greets me with an envelope. Her parents sent us a card and cheque for our anniversary. A week late, but the first time they've remembered in eight years.
  
  After 8 months of the silent treatment, they picked last night to "reestablish contact". Well we talked about it a bit this morning and I told her about what her parents were saying to others.
  
  She was quite shocked that this had been since October. I told her that I was worried when I had heard about this that she didn't feel comfortable talking to me about it anymore and she just shrugged.
  
  She said she could see it coming and didn't put too much weight in it. I had printed off that post on the "narcissistic mother" a while back and gave it to her. Since then her mother had re-established contact with other daughter, the "golden child" so my wife was just waiting for the other shoe to drop.
  
  She has a good friend network now and receives alot of praise from her best friend's mother who sadly in the past year has shown more appreciation for my wife then her biological mother did her whole life.
  
  I left the book for her to read, but I'm not sure if she will or not.
  
  We're coming up on summer and I think this is their attempt to reestablish contact for the grandkids to come visit. She agreed but said she wasn't going to go down.
  
  I reminded her she said that last year too and still went. I refused to drive down or use our vacation budget on them so they paid for her trip down. we had to pay for the trip back though, nice huh?
  
  I told her that she can go if she likes, but the kids won't be going. They'll need to prove to me that they can handle a relationship with their daughter before I'll let them have any further influence on our children.
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  20

  The exercise thread

  by Satans little helper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so this is it, the exercise thread.

  share your tips and experiences and tell us what worked best for you, how you managed to lose the weight and whether or not you kept it off as time went on.

  how did you keep your motivation long term?

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  Paralipomenon

  I need to figure something out.
  
  I work at a desk job and now commute 2-3 hours each day. Since I started over a year ago I've grown to ~25 over my ideal weight.
  
  Given that there's only so many hours in a day, when I get home I want to spend time with my family. Since then I've mused the following
  
  I can be:
  
  1) Gainfully employed
  2) A good father
  3) In shape
  
  Pick two.
  
  I'm trying to play with my schedule at work to accommodate a workout time. I'm actually very competitive but have nobody to compete with. Anyone interested in a JWD weight loss competition thread?
  
  Provide an initial weight and once a week post a status update and weigh in? Might be able to pick up tips or encouragement from each other.
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  26

  Freedom

  by sweet pea in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  what a rollercoaster the last couple of days has been.

  having been prompted gently and lovingly by husband 'besty' i have examined my faith, sorry the organisation, and finally realised that he has been right all along in his reservations.

  i feel all sorts of emotions, mainly happiness at finally feeling free - no more meetings (i never could see why we had to attend 3 a week and always felt stressed about taking the babies along when they should be in bed!

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  Paralipomenon

  Welcome Sweatpea,
  
  I'm working through the issue with my wife, would you care to elaborate on what led you to start researching for your own?
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  35

  Were motoring through Canada -- need tips.

  by Fatfreek in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  end of july, early august -- we're coming, the four of us.

  wife judy and brother-in-law and sister-in-law and i are squeezing into our buick and heading north.

  we're thinking of starting our east to west trek at nova scotia and make it to british columbia after some two weeks.

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  Paralipomenon

  Oh, and also when in Nova Scotia, buy a Donair.
  
  They're sold at most pizza parlors in the area, with a few specialty shops offering donairs only.
  
  This is a meal that is only available in the maritimes and is fantastic. Most people that move away from NS bemoan the lack of donairs.
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  35

  Were motoring through Canada -- need tips.

  by Fatfreek in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  end of july, early august -- we're coming, the four of us.

  wife judy and brother-in-law and sister-in-law and i are squeezing into our buick and heading north.

  we're thinking of starting our east to west trek at nova scotia and make it to british columbia after some two weeks.

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  Paralipomenon

  Nova Scotia is my old stomping grounds as well.
  
  You'll need to stop in the Bay of Fundy to see low tide. You will see a harbor that was at one time full, will have completely receded out leaving the ships resting in the mud.
  
  Peggy's cove is another must see.
  
  Cabot trail is nice, but much better in the fall. A trip to Cape Breton is worthwhile just to hear the native "Bretoners" speak.
  
  If you have a day, I'd suggest staying in Dartmouth (cheaper hotels) then start the day off by taking the ferry over to Halifax and just walking the warf.
  
  Walk upto Citadel Hill and over to the public gardens. Enjoy some local cuisine and walk back to the ferry.
  
  Leaving Halifax on the TransCanada heading west, just after you pass Truro there will be a rest stop for "Masstown Market" It's the only stop off the highway for a while and is a great place to check out local arts and crafts as well as get a bite to eat. You can pop off the main route to check out the Bay of Fundy before continuing into New Brunswick.