Posts by J-ex-W

25

"Ashley Treatment" keeps severely disabled girl from growing

by Fe2O3Girl in

this news story came out today and i was surprised that we haven't had a lively discussion about it.

it brought to mind some of the ideas we discussed on the "is circumcision child abuse?

" thread.. ashley is now 9 years old.

J-ex-W

One person asked about the motivation for the surgeries to prevent sexual maturation, including the breasts. This is to prevent her from becoming a victim of sexual abuse by unscrupulous caregivers, etc. Unfortunately, this kind of thing happens all too often to vulnerable adults, females especially.

15

What do you single guys do?

by frozen one in

do any other single guys here experience this?

i can go for months without meeting one woman of interest.

then suddenly women start coming out of the wood work.

J-ex-W

I agree with the first response--see all three, but go slow. I also add: Be up front with each woman that you're just being at the stage of getting to knowa few different people, dipping your toes into the dating pool. And take it slow. Use the time to decide if this is someone you think you could want a long term connection with. And when you reach a point where you like one well enough to see her exclusively, then is the time to introduce more 'physical' contact (including kissing). No sooner. You won't be branded a player if you're giving each woman honesty and respect.

16

Are you vindictive?

by free2beme in

jw
friends

once you left the witnesses, did you want some sort of revenge?

when you left relationships in your past, did you do something to harm the other person with words or actions?

when you left jobs, did you bad mouth your employer with a hope of harming him/her financially?

J-ex-W

Sometimes I wish I could be. It would have at least put me on equal ground in combatting my ex-husband's attacks. But then again, that equal ground will also be lower ground, and therein lies the rub. I am getting closer to wanting to see some justice, though, as opposed to just walking away and letting it go untended.

24

Online Dating etiquette

by serendipity in

i ran across this info and thought it would be good to share since there are some here who are using online dating sites like match and plentyoffish.

i've been a bit surprised by some of the men emailing me, demonstrating that this info is not common knowledge.

(i'm not suggesting that men alone are guilty.

J-ex-W

BTW, he knew I was leaving on a trip and wouldn't be back until the 4th or 5th. I just don't know if because email is so ubiquitious I would be expected to keep touch during that time (especially since it took some effort to convince him I wasn't spam or a jokester).

24

Online Dating etiquette

by serendipity in

i ran across this info and thought it would be good to share since there are some here who are using online dating sites like match and plentyoffish.

i've been a bit surprised by some of the men emailing me, demonstrating that this info is not common knowledge.

(i'm not suggesting that men alone are guilty.

J-ex-W

Question about the etiquette: I may be close to having unintenionally broken the last one (not to disappear into cyberspace). I e-mailed a local guy whose profile I saw and liked on myspace.com--not necessarily for dating, specifically, but just to expand my social circle...you know. Anyway, after a few exchanges (and some wariness on his part--I had to send him a couple pics ["Fair is fair," he said], he agreed to meet up for coffee after the holidays.

I emailed him last night for the first time in about two weeks now. Is that two weeks the equivalent of 'disappearing?' I'm wondering because we had daily exchanges for several days before he could be persuaded this was real and agreed to meet. Do you think I may have inadvertently angered him/ fueled his insecurity that way over this past two weeks of silence--made it look like it was a hoax, etc. I'm concerned now that he might not respond because he feels convinced that he was taken for a ride. [I'm sincere about meeting him.] Anyone?

3

Scrub a Dub... today's text messages to the ex

by merfi in

jw
friends

so i texted the jw ex today to ask the name of a co so that i might add to the thread... here's how it went:.

me: what was the name of the co that was a creep & bald & had a sunburnt head from golfing?.

him: what does it matter @ this point?.

J-ex-W

Merfi--- Any chance it was Tarbert? Did he seem gay and give talks in really superficial tone?

5

"JW's Do Not Offer Entertainment"

by metatron in

jw
friends

feb 07 awake , page 9.

"jehovah's witnesses do not offer entertainment at their meetings..".

well, ain't that the truth!.

J-ex-W

Oh, come on now--! When you go into it with the right mindset, the whole thing is entertaining, really!

5

Never asks me questions of her own...

by onlycurious in

jw
friends

my employee and i have a friendship outside of work, even though i am her boss and about 15 short years her senior.

okay, i'm kindof a mentor friend.. anyway, she is a jw doing 50hrs a month in service and is a 2nd generation jw.

if it wasn't for her mom i swear she would jump ship.. i talk very openly about my faith, church, youth group, people in need and how we handle that...etc.. she never asks me anything.

J-ex-W

Actually, since she's not asking any questions, this sounds to me like she is listening to draw you out and establish what feels to you like a non-threatening environment to hear about the teachings that shebelieves, which are new and foreign to you. Eventually, if/ when she discerns that you are even more receptive [at next-phase readiness], she will start telling you that this is the way, instead of just answeringquestions.

Some JW's, whether weak or strong in their faith, are more comfortable witnessing in a format in which they are SPOON-feed the opportunity to answer questions, rather than having to actively cultivate the [worldly person's ] curiosity. She could be simply quietly enjoying this opportune arrangement which has been placed upon her lap. But the effect of it can go either way from here, especially since you have a friendship and regular dialogue going.

Be aware of where her mindset must be, though. Witnesses who care for worldly friends may be respectful of how they handle the right of an individual to make their own choice...but always only to a point--unless or until they are on the way out. Based on what I'm hearing, I don't know that she's there yet.

4