Posts by Hortensia

25

Finally sent that letter, but not to mom...

by Odrade in

no not that letter.. so we hobbled along with the family relationship.

my parents (super-devout, highly involved and connected in jw-land,) spoke with me occasionally with that sad mopey voice.

at one point about 6 years ago, my mom quit speaking to me.

Hortensia

Good for you! People somehow mistakenly believe that they owe something to their parents, the parents who neglected, mistreated, abused and shunned their own children. We don't owe them anything. And telling the truth does relieve a lot of stress.

I had an ambivalent relationship with my JW mother until she died. Not as bad as many experiences I've read here, but not always good, either. It took going to a psychologist for therapy to finally realize that it was OK to feel the way I did. What else could she expect from me, considering all that had gone before?

20

My day

by Hortensia in

decided to spend the day wasting time.

drove down to redding.

on the way i saw the real woody woodpecker -- every time i see one of those red-headed woodpeckers i think of the cartoon character.

Hortensia

Decided to spend the day wasting time. Drove down to Redding. On the way I saw the real Woody Woodpecker -- every time I see one of those red-headed woodpeckers I think of the cartoon character. I also saw a pair of wild turkeys. They seem strangely unafraid of people, I've heard that turkeys are pretty stupid, but you'd think the wild ones would have some smarts just to survive.

Shopped until I was completely tired. Had pseudo-tacos at Jack-in-the-Box (I love those tacos!). On the way back there's a spot on highway 5 where I could see both Mt. Lassen and Mt. Shasta, covered with snow and towering above all the other mountains around there. Listened to the three tenors, Paul Potts and Linda Ronstadt, sang loudly with them while driving.

I got a little lonely toward the end of the day, in a good kind of way. I took it to mean I was tired and hungry. Stopped for coffee and apple turnover.

A nice day all to myself, being completely irresponsible and idle.

And how was your day?

18

Why are people so dramatic

by rebel8 in

jw
friends

i want to retire.

i'm quite a ways off from the age to collect social security and all.

i don't hate working--i actually like it.

Hortensia

I'm thinking of ordering a T-shirt that says, "Not my monkeys, not my circus!"

Or, maybe, "My name is Wes, I ain't in this mess!"

14

Why can't I just leave?

by Trapped in JW land in

some of you may know my situation.

i'm still going to meetings, but i am a closet apostate and homosexual i. only keep going to meetings to please my family and some friends.

i guess i could tell my mom i no longer want to be a jehovah's witness and stop going to meetings, but i'm too scared to do it.

Hortensia

Living authentically gives you peace of mind, reduces stress. If the authentic you is homosexual, hiding that is stressful. Maybe don't rock the boat until you move over to the university, but definitely the day you tell the truth about yourself and how you feel about that stupid religion is the day you set yourself free.

12

It's all coming back...

by SoJo16 in

jw
friends

i joined the board this month and holy cow, are there ever some interesting points of view here.. a bit about my background: my dad was an unbaptised born-in who nevertheless went to vietnam and college where he met my mom.

mom was lutheran, but dad told her the only religion he was interested in belonging to was the jdubs.

they married in the early 70s and were both baptized.

Hortensia

Hi, so glad to hear you got out of the wtbts and got your education. I love all the different opinions on this forum and all the experiences that so many have shared. Glad you're here, too.

102

Bill Cosby - too much smoke for no fire?

by Simon in

it seems like the list of people who are accusing him of rape and sexual assault is growing every day.

i'm skeptical of single accusations but the number of people and the similar stories seem overwhelming now.. it's not a conviction but to the court of public opinion ... guilty?.

.

Hortensia

My own rule of thumb is that if one person makes the charge, you can't say one way or the other what really happened. But when one person makes a charge, and then other people start coming out of the woodwork making the same charge, it is likely true.

I recall many years ago some report about him cheating on his wife, and his claim that she forgave him for it.

I bet a lot of old geezers who pulled that sort of thing 30 years ago or so are quaking in their boots now, for fear they'll get Jimmy Savilled too. Or maybe they are arrogant SOBs who don't think it was wrong and aren't worried.

Arghhh!

26

If You Don't Believe In God Anymore, Do You Still Say God Bless You or Thank God, etc.?

by minimus in

jw
friends

honestly, do you??

and if you do, isn't that hypocritical!.

Hortensia

I quite often say, "jesus christ!" with feeling. If the feeling is really intense, I say, "jesus f*cking christ!"

Does that count?

18

Why are people so dramatic

by rebel8 in

jw
friends

i want to retire.

i'm quite a ways off from the age to collect social security and all.

i don't hate working--i actually like it.

Hortensia

Oh, dear! I have some bad news for you, dear. I am retired, live in a senior apartment complex. I never saw so much drama! Right now terrible drama over elections for the residents' association board. I do believe -- and I'm not kidding -- that the police will be called over this one. One gal has had to be taken to the hospital because her blood pressure got too high during a shouting match. She wasn't shouting, just being shouted at. Oh lordy, emotions run high around here. Over everything. As you said, "Drama, drama, drama. It's like how I imagine Survivor to be--someone's always trying to build an alliance and vote someone off the island." Right now they're trying to vote the current residents' association president off the island.

I recommend a desert island. Except that as soon as you get there, Survivor will show up and start filming.

42

Ongoing frustration with wife

by Flipping El in

i've tried taking the slow, patient approach with my wife.

i believe i first posted here about 13 months ago about my wife.. we've always had good communication and could talk endlessly about philosophy, neuroscience, sociology and then when i learned the ttatt, i clammed up a bit about spiritual things.

i'd always been fairly liberal, suggesting other alternative ideas, but then i told my wife about the un/ngo scandal (i ran across the guardian story doing a talk as an ms, lol!

Hortensia

I agree with apognophos. She may be trying to get you to tell her you won't leave her and don't want another wife. She may be trying to say what she thinks you are thinking, trying to get you to get off the fence. If you want the marriage to last, then you should start reassuring her that you love her, even if you don't believe in the wtbts. You might be a little too delicate in your attempts to not rock the boat.

27

I have nothing left in the tank, I need help

by Yondaime in

i dont have the willpower to attend meetings anymore.

i'm literally on the sound system list every week.

i'm either reading on sunday or tuesday, praying on tuesday nites, adjusting mics, passing mics, or working the sound system, or doing last minute parts for the service meeting.

Hortensia

Maybe find out about studying overseas for a year. Exchange program or something. Germany, maybe? After all, it's a good JW thing to learn a second language anyway.