Posts by Maddie

3

Time can heal, but not completely

by Maddie in

it's been a long time since i looked in here; even longer since i posted.

i don't recognise hardly anyone on the site now, but remember the support from posters when things were very difficult for me, as i made the decision to leave the watch tower.

it was a so painful not being able to have my jw son and baby grand daughter and not having them in my life any more and still hurts two years later, but it is bearable now most of the time.. i don't regret leaving because i couldn't live a lie after i knew it was a cult.

Maddie

mamalove - Thank you for the hugs. I am lucky in that I have a very supportive husband (never been a JW), which really helps. I am in the "real world" now if you know what I mean and accept life on lifes terms.

I have a job dealing with the public and am involved as a Health & Safety Representative so go on lots of courses which I love doing. I was involved in a campaign recently that is about preventing abuse on shop workers and the local press are doing an article which will feature in the local newspaper soon.

I also have another son who is not a JW and I have a close bond with. Unfortunately, he only has minimal contact with my other son too which is very sad. My JW son seems to of cut everyone, even family who are not JW's virtually out of his life. His wife has a huge part to play in this situation and seems to be very influential with my son. There have been a few times when I have felt like giving her a piece of my mind, but have resisted the inclination!

As things stand I don't hold out much hope of things changing, which is why I try very hard to focus on getting them out now and just live my life. To do otherwise would ultimately destroy me and the people in my life.

Lozhasleft - It is very cruel my friend, all about control, emotional blackmail and the cause of pain. It ruins many lives so we have to be very strong when we take a stand. Many hugs to you xxxx

3

Time can heal, but not completely

by Maddie in

it's been a long time since i looked in here; even longer since i posted.

i don't recognise hardly anyone on the site now, but remember the support from posters when things were very difficult for me, as i made the decision to leave the watch tower.

it was a so painful not being able to have my jw son and baby grand daughter and not having them in my life any more and still hurts two years later, but it is bearable now most of the time.. i don't regret leaving because i couldn't live a lie after i knew it was a cult.

Maddie

It's been a long time since I looked in here; even longer since I posted. I don't recognise hardly anyone on the site now, but remember the support from posters when things were very difficult for me, as I made the decision to leave the Watch Tower. It was a so painful not being able to have my JW son and baby grand daughter and not having them in my life any more and still hurts two years later, but it is bearable now most of the time.

I don't regret leaving because I couldn't live a lie after I knew it was a cult. It is a huge price to pay for all of us who are shunned by our loved ones; nearly every day something acts as a trigger in my life to remind me of it all.

I have lots to be grateful for in my life these days and lead a busy and fulfilled life, free from the sinister control of the JW cult. I hope this is encouragement to posters who want to leave but are still prisoners because of fear.

Regards Maddie

35

The phrase "The Truth"

by lepermessiah in

jw
friends

so, i am curious..... how many of you have a hard time getting that phrase out of your vocabulary?.

i have been conscienciously trying not to use it at all, so now when i am in a conversation with a jw, its amazing how often they use that phrase.

i look back and wonder "god, did i say that that often?

Maddie

All cults say they have the "Truth". It is all part of the mind control tactics they use. I agree it is a very arrogant assumption but appeals to the "we are the chosen ones psychology". It is very effective as a tool in the art of manipulation and mind control.

Maddie

53

Totally Busted and Scared!!!!!!

by 2pink in

jw
friends

my husband and i have been fading/disappearing for a few months now.

we haven't been to meetings in quite some time, but most of our family members live out of the area, so they don't know yet.

so with the spirit of joy that comes from newly exiting a doomsday cult, we have been celebrating all the holidays as well as my 5 year old's birthday (she turned 5 on december 2).

Maddie

Hi 2Pink - I had a similar problem when I decided toleave the WT. My problem was knowing that I would lose my family when they knew my decision. For"a while I lived in torment trying to "Live a Lie", and keep how I really felt from my son and his wife. After a lot of soul-searching I knew that I had to be true to myself and couldn't pretend anymore. The cost has been severe, as my son has completely cut me off and I am not allowed to see my only grandchild any more.

As hard as it has been though I have no regrets about being free of the WT cult now as the alternative was anacceptable to me. I wish you all the best.

Maddie

114

What Assembly were you baptized at...

by vilot in

jw
friends

i was baptized at the 1976 "sacret secret" dc at inglewood ca there must have been 50,000 people there..

Maddie

Bowes Road - quite a small venue

93

How many here actually still believe that there is a God??

by annalice in

jw
friends

after being gone from the jw's for many years now , and having done extensive research on the history of god and the belief in him , i can't seem to find any logical way to have a belief in an invisble being up there ruling over us.

how many here still believe?

how many don't?.

Maddie

I do believe in God. At times I have struggled with it all and been very angry over being deceived by the WT. I have had many conflicting thoughts and emotions but the bottom line is that now that I am free from the entrapment of the cult, my faith comes from the heart and I understand that God is very different from the one the JW's portray through their erroneous teachings.

Maddie

37

Lack of education does not = stupid.

by bluecanary in

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[endif] in combatting cult mind control, steve hassan writes:.

in principle, i am against banning cults from college campuses unless they expressly violate rules of conduct that every student organization is expected to follow.

Maddie

There are all types of people in cults; it isn't to do with lack of intelligence. Many intelligent but very idealistic people get drawn into cults, many vulnerable people too. Some want to believe because they are looking for answers to everything or are unhappy so want to believe everything will soon change. I agree with others posters that education does/can give people the ability to develop critical thinking ability, and this will enable people to leave if they are already ensnared in a cult, or better still help them not to get captured in the first place. Maddie

14

how are the dubs reacting to swine flu?

by highdose in

i'm just curious as the offical govement advice about swine flu is to stay away from public areas if poss and if you have swine flu to stay from everyone full stop!.

but my experiance of jw's is that they would go to the hall wether they were infectious or not.

many is the time i've sat behind someone coughing or spluttering away!

Maddie

Well, I dont know if its affecting their meeting attendance but I am sure they relish the situation, because they are eagerly expectant that it is means Armageddon is here! I feel very sorry for them that they are so desperate for it to happen. Being enslaved to a cult is a very unhappy and exhausting way to live for many of them. They have nothing to look forward to in the life they have so who can blame them for wanting it to end?!

Maddie

26

Is punishing someone for changing their religion against international law

by ldrnomo in

i saw this on wikipedia:.

the united nations commission on human rights, considers the recanting of a person's religion a human right legally protected by the international covenant on civil and political rights: "the committee observes that the freedom to 'have or to adopt' a religion or belief necessarily entails the freedom to choose a religion or belief, including the right to replace one's current religion or belief with another or to adopt atheistic views [...] article 18.2 bars coercion that would impair the right to have or adopt a religion or belief, including the use of threat of physical force or penal sanctions to compel believers or non-believers to adhere to their religious beliefs and congregations, to recant their religion or belief or to convert."[5].

seems to me that being shunned by family and friends for quitting jehovah's witnesses would be penal sanctions.. .

Maddie

I agree with you wholeheartedly and am glad that you started this thread. The article makes the point that more subtle formsof coersion apply too. Emotional coersion is definitely used by the JW's through the fear of shunning by family and friends.

I will be interested to hear what other posters think, or if anyone knows where we stand legally on this issue.

Maddie

52

How do you have a personal relationship with G

by Sour Grapes in

Maddie

Strange as it may seem, I saw a short film in which the same question was discussed. It was said that to have a personal relationship with God, we need to be in tune with Him. It's got nothing to do with being a so-called religious person because many of these ones are probably less in tune with God than people that don't profess such religious conviction. An example of this would be to compare the Pharisees of Jesus's day to the good Samaritan.

God is Spirit so to have a personal relationship with Him our spirit has to identify with Him. I believe that this is made possible by having the Holy Spirit, available to all who accept Christ and pray for it. We can contact God only by our spirit, because God is Spirit.

John 4:24 says, "God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit."

If we know how to turn to our spirit, we can contact Christ. This is the key!

Maddie