wheelintheskykeepsonturning
JoinedTopics Started by wheelintheskykeepsonturning
-
31
Self-Esteem Shot To Pieces - No Friends
by wheelintheskykeepsonturning inschool sucked for me as a witness.. i always wanted to be popular, have friends, have a girlfriend, go to parties, play after school sport, stay the night at friends places, do all the other stuff which was fun and made you socially acceptable - which made you feel normal - but was disallowed because i was a witness child.. i thought everything everyone did at school was a direct test of satan on me.
that's what i was told.. so i tried to go through school living a "double life".
i desperatley wanted to be obidient to my witness mother who i loved so much and have her approval... so while i tried hard to pretend i wasn't a witness at school - for fear of being ostracized by my peers - i also was obviously "different" to my friends...and because of this i took a lot of shit for it and eventually became unpopular to the point where i dropped out of high school because i thought no one liked me.. for example: i would never "go out" with girls who wanted to go out with me... because i was afraid they would ring my home and my mum would be "disappointed in me" and angry and upset at me.
-