Posts by -Tank

88

What type of person are you attracted to now?

by Layla33 in

i was just thinking about this the other day, about how my ideas of a romantic partner have changed since being a jw.. growing up, i thought i would marry a very upstanding jw, we would pioneer together, do missionary work, have children, see the world.

(never had any thoughts about bethel, though.

) so what it boiled down to was a stepford husband, up tight, not the least bit sexual, closed minded bore.. so now that i have grown up, seen the world, been married (and actually picked a good man the first time, although it didn't work out), i just contrast that with what i am attracted to now.. i like them open minded, earthy, i love artistic types because i am a published writer, hair doesn't matter to me (long/short, bald, etc), challenges convention, very sexual, still like a traveling man.. i am just curious if you anyone else can compare and contrast how their ideas have changed since breaking out the group-think of the jw organization..

-Tank

I have the idea in my head of the type of woman I want, but just can't put it into words I guess.

As one other member stated a few pages back, I deny love in all aspects, I deny it exists and I deny the feeling, to say I am bitter is an under statement. I am better off alone for the rest of my days.

10

There is a girl that I like that I wish to start dating.

by D2meep in

the reason i'm posting here is because the girl i like (chelsea) is a jehovahs witness and i am not.

i used to try to pursue a relationship with her up until two years ago when i moved about an hour from her house after i graduated and started going to a tech college.

i used to think she liked me also because we used to do things with each other even though her mother hated the idea of her daughter dating (such as movies, going to the mall to hang out, amusment parks) and chelsea never actully said anything we did was a date but i could tell she enjoyed my company and still does but the way she acts towards me now is confusing.

-Tank

Hi D2meep.

I had a very similar situation to yours, except it went even further.

I know it hurts to say this, and I know you think I am crazy, and trying to rain on your parade, but trust me when I say, I went through what you did, and I did not win. You may be better off to get over this now, assume the worst, and move on with your life. If you say or do anything at all that implies in a bad way to the watchtower society, they will view you as Satan, and suddenly you will become the enemy.

Here is my story, I hope it helps you. There are also countless other stories here, keep browsing, and you will find many common grounds amongst us and others.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/20/147125/1.ashx

27

hard to find "in" relationship while inactive

by believerNYCgirl in

i was out of the truth and in a relationship for 4 years.

i didn't go to the meetings at all, my bf lived with me, and we celebrated holidays.

i never stopped believing the truth.

-Tank

Not ALL worldly people are distasteful.

I am a "wordly" person as it is called, and I am guilty of being a workaholic, that's it. I do not smoke, drink, party it up, go clubbing, and what have you. I do not believe in lieing to other people. I was raised with respect, morals and values. I treat others and there belongings, exactly the same way I wish for me and my things to be treated.

I am just a roughneck, but, I was raised a good one.

The point I am trying to make is, not EVERY "worldly" person is bad. The only thing one can do is try to meet people, people in general, not necessarily a specific type of person at first. There are alot of opinions on this board, not only here, but everywhere you go. The only thing you can really do, is decide what you want, find out what it is you need to do to get there, and start making your way.

My only advice to that is, decide what is best, for you. Do not decide something your family, friends, co-workers want or push you to decide. You have to do what is best for you. You are a responsible mature woman, if you take your time, I know you'll succeed and do great.

27

hard to find "in" relationship while inactive

by believerNYCgirl in

i was out of the truth and in a relationship for 4 years.

i didn't go to the meetings at all, my bf lived with me, and we celebrated holidays.

i never stopped believing the truth.

-Tank

sweetface2233 gives some great, sound advice here. Just live your life right now and enjoy what your doing. Have some fun, focus on your career and whatever strikes your fancy. I had to learn myself that, you need to be happy with yourself, and like yourself first, before you can think about taking on a relationship. You are at a major fork in the road in your lifetime, and you need to decide which direction you want to travel. This way, as sweetface2233 said, you will find someone to complement you, not complete you. You have a PM believerNYCgirl.

8

At what point...?

by -Tank in

do you ever wonder at what point...you just say screw it?

at what point do you get so bitter, and so down towards love, that you think your better off to shun it from your entire life?

at what point do ya just friggen lose it?

-Tank

Thanks all, and that is some very good advice darkuncle29, thanks.

I will def look you up when I am around the Edmonton way on my Vacation, would be a privilege to meet ya!

I know now I have to like myself first, and know who I am and what I want, before I know who I want, and what I want out of them and a relationship with them.

8

At what point...?

by -Tank in

do you ever wonder at what point...you just say screw it?

at what point do you get so bitter, and so down towards love, that you think your better off to shun it from your entire life?

at what point do ya just friggen lose it?

-Tank

I guess it is just me then.

As I stated in one poll, I am a Long Haul Trucker, so I am alone all the time, and I just work, and I guess it sometimes gets to me. It is different when your single but have a very active lifestyle and go out every night or have many friends you socialize with, it is alot harder to make it work when your alone in the cab 24/7.

I am also very very bitter and negative as the result of past love. I guess sometimes I find myself wonder, at what point will I just snap? At what point can a person only take so much of rejection and loneliness.

8

At what point...?

by -Tank in

do you ever wonder at what point...you just say screw it?

at what point do you get so bitter, and so down towards love, that you think your better off to shun it from your entire life?

at what point do ya just friggen lose it?

-Tank

Do you ever wonder at what point...you just say screw it? At what point do you get so bitter, and so down towards love, that you think your better off to shun it from your entire life? At what point do ya just friggen lose it? If you do, are you missing out, or is a happy life alone possible?

8

Why I never say "run"

by jgnat in

you might be wondering, when i respond to a lovelorn person in love with a witness, why i never say "run"!

believe, me, i understand the huge personal cost when a non-witness gets seriously involved with a witness.

in my situation, i have a lot of mitigating factors that allow me to take greater risks.

-Tank

Excellent post!!

Very helpful to me as it basically pertains almost exactly to my current situation.

18

20th Anniversay

by VoidEater in

my partner and i celebrate our 20th anniversary today!.

hmm...a successful relationship outside of the the troof...who would've thought it possible.... anyways - 20 years without a raised voice, a fight, a heated argument; 20 years of mutual respect, even when not in agreement, and getting along; 20 years of love and kindness, and mutual support.. who would've thought a jw and a mormon could both recover and prosper...!.

-Tank

Conrgats, Happy Anniversary to both of you!! As was said, you give hope to the rest of us, I wish you many more years of love and happiness side by side!

46

Hi all, I am new, found a JW

by -Tank in

meet her, and we all go out and have fun it was a great time, and .

went on, we talked more, and more...and more....and more, and .

family issues back home, so she and her friends did not get to see .

-Tank

So much good advice, so many different ways I can approach this and different options I can choose.

Right now I am just living life day by day, whatever happens, happens, I am just workin and making money, love is out the window.

Thanks again all!