my question is ;.
what kinds of information/lies was spoken at the last few meetings where an co has appeared?
my friends are acting a bit different.
Dear Mog -
WELCOME!
Thank you so much for sharing your story. We all bring our grief with us when we come here. It lightens our load. But the building up of faith is what fills the void we are all left with. Looking forward to many more posts from you.
Malinda (MMae)
i have decided to buy myself a bible.. i have a new world translation but the large print version, so i tend not to use it.
after reading crisis of conscience i have decided to discard this translation anyway, but at a loss as to what translation to use.
i also have a few old king james bibles but the language is unreadable to me.
For study: The New Jerusalem Bible. If find it to an excellent reference Bible, and it's translators seem to have made notable effort in accuracy.
For spiritual upbuilding and ease of reading with understanding: The Message Bible.
someone you would set and listen to their problems and they listened to yours.
they were friends.
but when you left they were gone.
I was df'd a dozen years ago. I also moved a short distance away at the same time, so that also served to severe relationships. Recently a JW relative passed on, so I attended his memorial. To my suprise almost everyone spoke to me. But the two that I noticed who deliberately would not speak to me, were two people that I felt I had a very close relationship with at one time. It just seemed weird.
ive heard talk but am not certain please tell me
Having gone over 120 questions (last I heard), no one can make a claim that they didn't know what they were getting into should they get disfellowshipped at some later date.
for me, it was not being able to prove that people were going to be resurrected to earth... i'm still not sure of the answer, but for some reason that just started this huge, fast snowball of different things that i couldn't prove... .
this lightbulb just went off in my head... .
I remember the first assembly where the baptism was done in the name of the Father, the Son, and (how the H do they word that?) in the name of God's Spirit-driven organization??!
It didn't cinch it for me, but it was a REALLY big flag. I remember thinking how glad I was that I had been baptised prior to this change, because I didn't think I could have answered "Yes!" to that!
It was just wrong.
i feel real down at the moment at the injustice of it all , i know the world is full of injustice but it just makes me so mad , did anyone on here move on after their child was abused and if so how did you do it ?
i feel i cant move on till she has but at the moment that seems a long way off , bulimia and flashbacks seem to rule her life , the local congregation are not allowed to discuss it with me , even fellow victims mothers , probably because im worldly .
i have wrote a strongley worded letter to the elders regarding the fact that had they reported the local min servant perv to the police years ago my child would not be like this , and that i reported him to the police to protect other peoples children so why didnt they?
Dearest LooLoo -
Healing takes years, but most of us make it to the other side. Please, get professional help for your daughter and yourself. If finances or lack of insurance is a problem, you can probably get counseling paid for through your state's crime victim compensation program. You should be able to locate the number in state phone listings, through the police department, through a crisis care line, a rape hotline, or your comunity may have a community information line - usually "211."
Do everything you can to keep your daughter (and you) feeling safe. Absolutely do NOT make her tell the elders about her experience. They are NOT trained in dealing with this kind of trauma, and usually are only trying to find out how much guilt the victim bears - AS IF! And to pressure both of you to keep silent. Your daughter should not have to go anywhere that she may likely run into her abuser.
As far as legal recourse (suing) laws vary from state to state. If your daughter is a minor, the clock my not start ticking on the statute of limitations until her 18th birthday. If she is above 18, and had repressed memories, the clock may start upon the return of memories sufficent to understand what happened to her. A representative from crime victims compensation can give you all this information.
There is nothing, nothing, more healing than knowing you are not alone. And understanding that feelings of shame and guilt are normal, but that they are misplaced. They belong on the perpetrator, not the victim. After some individual counseling, survivor groups can be very supportive. (Sometimes they aren't though, so if your daughter isn't feeling like she's with safe friends in a group, find another.)
Oh, and soft blankets to wrap up in, and large squishy teddy bears to hug, can do more in a way of bringing comfort than you can imagine. A note book to write down feelings and memories as they come, or a locked diary if it feels safer, can be an incredible healing tool. For you as well. It helps to break through the confusion and conflict that tends to rage in victims minds and hearts. Others have a better outlet through drawing or other types of art. Where ever your daughter's talents are, they can be her salvation as well. And never underestimate the power of being destructive - just as long as it is carried it out in a safe manor. I knew one woman who went to the beach with a wooden baseball bat, and hit rock after rock into the sound until the bat was beat to a pulp. Then she went home and dismantled the chainsaw her abuser (a family member) had loaned to her, piece by piece, literally. There wasn't a nut and bolt still together when she finished. (She returned it to him in a cardbaord box.)
The worst thing is having to hold the silence of the nightmare in. She needs permission to vent, and to be able to do it at a pace that she can handle. God's comfort be with both of you. Our prayers are with you. Let us know how you are holding up.
Malinda
Many have been df'd for being victims:
http://www.4jehovah.org/exjw-annemarie.php
exJWvideos.com has a heart wrenching story from a young woman named Amy.
Back in the 40's, seven black men raped a sister in Virginia who was selling WTs. They were all given the death sentence and were executed
This must have been devestating for the poor woman involved. I hope every guilty party was held accountable. Having said that, I'd like to hear from the accussed. Oh, that's right, they're dead. I'm assuming the victim was white. (I wonder what the punishment would have been if the races were reversed?)
Sorry, it just smells of racism and lynch mob mentality.
I digress from the topic. My apologies.
how long before something happened (i:e 9/11) before you stopped thinking the big a was coming??.
i read 7 news papers a week it took me a long time to read about some big bad event without thinking this is it the big a is about to happen now i read it for what it is.. what about you.
.
I think it will always have some influence on my thinking. I still believe in the coming of a Great Tribulation. Not because of the JWs, although I heard it there first. Many cultures and foreseers have predictions that are comprable to Revelations. I think the world's stage is being set very quickly now for devestation, especially in the USA. I personally wouldn't mind a cleansing of the Earth by a loving and insightful God. This, of course brings me to the paradox of a wrathful God, verses His loving Son, who is in every way like His Father?
At this point in my life I have a very open mind. I think about what the Bible seems to say on certain subjects - let's say homosexuality for one. And I pray, "Father, I am not more loving, just, and righteous than you! How can it be possible that you could condemn one for their normal sexual expression, when I do not?" My only conclusion is that He also does not, and what has been set down as God's will, isn't.
I think evolution is undeniable, but I believe that God is the force behind it. And other seeming contradictions. I cannot deny the existance of God. I've heard Him (a quiet voice in my ear), seen Him (by vision within my mind), and most of all felt His presence and influence in my life. Perhaps what I perceive as God is nothing more than my helping Spirits. I don't know. - And that is where I am really free from JW think.
To be able to say, "I don't know." The freedom to no longer need to be told what is or isn't. And to feel completely normal about it.
with my 22 year old df'd son in a very nearby city, and having met a few here that i want to do stuff with, how do i go about this?
thanks to my son, who has some older df'd friends, i was able to spend a couple of weeks at the beach together with them the last two summers.
it was me and five evil df'd ones on my boat, so i called a dub friend who was friends with the beach gang, and told him i was on the ussdf!
I concur. Let us know how your wife responds. And have a good time!
