Alexia

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Posts by Alexia

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  14

  "Sister," (or Brother) "May I have a word.....?"

  by Lady Zombie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since i'm still getting to know all of you, tell me about an incident when you were pulled aside and counseled.

  not having a formal jc meeting, but just an instance when some elder took it upon himself to "adjust" your thinking (or behavior).. here's one of mine.

  it still is infuriating to me two years later.. there was a sister who had three young daughters (4 to 9 years) and a husband, all in the org.

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  Alexia

  Talking during the meetings (with friends)
  Having a membership at the “Y” (YMCA)
  Going to trade school (after they discouraged me from college)
  Missing a meeting (theocratic ministry school/service meeting) to perform in a music group (though I went to the meeting the next day at a different congregation)
  Immodest dress (too much cleavage) while the elder was staring at my tits.
  Talking to the opposite sex at the conventions
  Not reaching out
  Dating w/o having a wedding date
  Getting married
  Leaving a physically and financially abusive ex husband
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  55

  Did you find worldly people as bad as the JW's made them out to be??

  by karter in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  as a jw we were always told worldly people were bad always out for what they could get out of you.

  as for me iv'e made some good friends not anything as bad as the jw's said they woul'd be.

  what about you ?????????

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  Alexia

  Never.

  Even while growing up as a JW, I had friends at school who were not JW starting in nursery school. NONE of my childhood school friends were JW either because there went many that went to my school or they were snooty.

  As I got older, it was constantly reinforced that “world’ people can be just as loving, compassionate, supportive, honest, etc as any so-call JW and many time, more so. When I was leaving my abusive JW ex-husband, gossip ran rapid in the congregation and the elders did not support me getting a divorce. No one offered any assistance or so much as call me. “Worldly” people I barley knew offered their couches and clothes off their backs for me. I didn’t have children so that wasn’t the motivation - people are just genuinely companionate.
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  31

  Were U Depressed Because U Were A Jehovah's Witness?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  people get depressed for various reasons.

  but do you know of people that actually suffered from depression mainly because they were witnesses?.

  i know of more than a few witnesses that were always discouraged and feeling down.

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  Alexia

  I was depressed when I was in.

  The bottom line, I wasn’t good enough and I was going to catch h3ll at Armageddon. When you’re constantly told you’re going to die if you don’t straighten up and fly right, it’s not hard to believe that many JW suffer from depression.

  Because my mother couldn’t divorce my non-JW alcoholic father (said the elders) my upbringing was hellish at times. That contributed to my depression as an adolescent and adult as well.

  Now that I’m OUT, I can get therapy, practice Yoga (a no-no in the BORG), mediate, and all the other things that are banned in the borg to heal myself.

  Thinking back on the other friends in the congregation, the one thing we were allowed to do is D-R-I-I-K; as long as we didn’t go to crazy around other friends. Every event, BBQ, gathering, etc (except weddings) had beer, wine, and hard liquor. Nothing wrong with drinking because I love wine, but it was something about they way they drank – almost like an escape.
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  10

  Ex-JW's near Morgan Hill, CA

  by donny in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  if there are any ex-jw's in or fairly close to morgan hill, ca please drop me an email at donnyreed!yahoo.com.

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  Alexia

  Welcome! I am not in Morgan Hill, but I am in the Bay Area.
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  115

  Self -Employed or Otherwise Gainfully Employed - Gas Prices Eating You Up?

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  last night at the gas pump i had a verbal , emotional outburst , swearing to no one in particular - just the gas pump , until i saw 2 guys at the island down from me - so i figured i'd let it rip !

  frustration over these insanely rising gas prices finally took it's toll on even -keeled mr. flipper !

  i started my rant , wanting these guys feedback , " what is it with these #ucking gas prices ?

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  Alexia

  I pay about $35 a week for gas to go to and from work (6 miles away). Public transportation cost slightly more, 4x longer and I cant combine trips (ie: go the the store or farmers market on the way home). I pay a little more if I use my car on the weekends for mostly highway dirving. Its a '07 Acura TL S and NOT fuel efficient LOL. Our other car (mostly weekends) is a after market '07 335i and obviously uses more gas but we take it on the highway. Gas for the cars is about $4.35/gal
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  44

  Singing at the Meetings is so mindless...

  by logic&reason in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i was always uncomfortable singing at the meetings when i was a kid.

  as an adult, i rarely if ever sing anymore because i think it is a joke.

  sit down, listen for 45 minutes.

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  Alexia

  I don’t miss the “brothers” and “sisters” with the God awful singing voices. I remember this one woman whose voice sounded like she was crying with something caught in her throat. Horrible. Me and my brother tried sooooo hard not to bust out laughing during the song. The worst was when it was happening right before the opening or closing prayer. We were busting out eardrums with tears streaming down our faces and snot coming out of our noses trying not to laugh during the prayer.
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  37

  For the Sisters: Were you ever happy you couldn't have male "privileges"?

  by Open mind in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  watchtower policies clearly make women second-class citizens.

  i don't see it changing anytime soon.

  this thread is not about how ridiculous it is that a female is not allowed to hand out mags, territory, books or carry a microphone if a qualified male is present.

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  Alexia

  Sitting in on judicial committees so you can hear how once again Brother Slimeball was insisting on his pioneer wife giving him oral sex.

  LMAO!!
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  37

  For the Sisters: Were you ever happy you couldn't have male "privileges"?

  by Open mind in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  watchtower policies clearly make women second-class citizens.

  i don't see it changing anytime soon.

  this thread is not about how ridiculous it is that a female is not allowed to hand out mags, territory, books or carry a microphone if a qualified male is present.

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  Alexia

  Oh yeah!

  I didn’t have to be the first ones at the hall stay until 11:00PM doing the accounts, counting magazines, etc.

  No running up and down the isles with microphones.
  
  Asking people to share embarrassing details about their sexual experience(s) (elders).

  Having to prepare for and conduct meeting, service, etc – it was nice to just f*** off sometimes.

  Wearing a suit and tie (after the age of 13, I stopped wearing tights and pantyhose).
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  23

  What were the things that troubled you as a JW?

  by Mickey mouse in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm not necessarily asking for the big stumbling blocks here or things you discovered once you started doing your own research outside the borg.

  i'm talking about the smaller things.. for me one thing was the talk of no one being able to become a witness unless "jehovahs drew them to him".

  as a born-in this never jived with me.

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  Alexia

  1. The whole Noah’s day accounts. The fact that God wiped out the entire Earth because the people didn’t believe Noah. They claimed that it had never rained on Earth before on the other hand; everyone was supposed to believe him – a man they did not know. Why didn’t God just speak up himself?

  2. Evolution.

  3. Masturbation.

  4. Discouraged from getting a college education aside from two year technical schools (that cost an arm and a leg and practically useless anyway!)

  5. Discouraged from getting mental help from a doctor. Advised not to see psychologists and psychiatrists. Depression happens because we are “spiritually weak”.

  
  6. Treatment of DF individuals.

  7. Discouraged from attending weddings and funerals in churches.

  8. All of the nasty, sexual details you have to tell to an elder if you were “immoral”

  9. Out of control gossip and rumors and gossip in the congregation.

  10. The poor guys who everyone knew they were gay and kept trying to quietly push them into marriage as soon as they turned 18.

  11. They way they treated those of us who had “unbelieving” parents (especially fathers) – like we were invisible. Never got parts on the programs, never invited to outings, etc.

  12. Always worried about “stumbling” others. Don’t buy that BMW, don’t wear that watch, don’t let anyone see you go to the R-Rated movie, and on and on.

  13. 4-day (then eventually 3-day) conventions. The only enjoyment was hanging out with your buddies and dressing up.

  14. No prom.
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  23

  Stupid Knorr! Should Witnesses have Sunday school just for kids?

  by Witness 007 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  imagine sitting thru the watchtower study on a sunday with your 6 year old and 9 year old kids....the topic "fornication" the discussion explains how oral sex and touching of genitals is still fornication...why do kids have to sit thru this??

  or the bible reading is about lot having sex with his daughters....this type of thing is not for kids!

  and why should kids be forced to sit quietly while someone drones on for 2 hours?.

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  Alexia

  I remember the images from the Live Forever book and other publications that had graphic Holocaust and other photos and illustrations – but we couldn’t see Schindler’s List because it was R-Rated??

  Also the flood account in the MBoBS had a illustration of a woman holding a baby and being stalked by a wild animal right before they drowned in the flood. That haunted me for years.

  Being spanked, pinched, swatted, and smacked was a fact of life in the KH. Two hour meetings was torture. The assemblies and 4 day conventions was unbearable – especially when we met at the Oakland Coliseum baseball stadium before they moved to the (indoor) Cow Palace. Sitting all-day baking in the hot sun watching people get baptized wishing you were the one going into the pool….(sigh). The food (especially the HOT breakfasts) and danishes was the highlight of my day!