Yeah..I've been DF'ed just over a year and a half..and I've heard nothing from the elders. My mother seems to think they're going to come around at some point. Im inclined to let them come, but I aint really sure why.
Regehr
JoinedPosts by Regehr
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19
yearly shepherding call from the elders
by milligal infor all those df'd people out there, you know the rumor about the annual encouraging call we are supposed to get?
well my df'd sister and i were talking and we had a couple thoughts over this.
our brother-in-law is an elder-of the regional building committee type.
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HELP! Writing Letter to My Parents.
by Regehr inhi, im still relatively new around here but i figured i'd go to the people that would know the best what to do.
im trying to write a letter to my parents expressing why i left the org, and how hard it is being df'ed and having them shun me.
i just don't know how to put alot of the stuff i've learned into words.
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Regehr
Holy Crap! This is great. Thank you very much!
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HELP! Writing Letter to My Parents.
by Regehr inhi, im still relatively new around here but i figured i'd go to the people that would know the best what to do.
im trying to write a letter to my parents expressing why i left the org, and how hard it is being df'ed and having them shun me.
i just don't know how to put alot of the stuff i've learned into words.
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Regehr
Hi, Im still relatively new around here but I figured I'd go to the people that would know the best what to do.
Im trying to write a letter to my parents expressing why I left the org, and how hard it is being DF'ed and having them shun me. I just don't know how to put alot of the stuff I've learned into words. (IE. 1975, the pedophilia stuff, other organizational blunders.).Im afraid to say some of these things because I know that it will label me as an apostate. Any advice?
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Did being a JW make you feel speical like you were part of something??
by karter inthe chosen ones perhaps?
for me it felt like we had a monopoly on the truth everyone else was wrong and we could prove it we were part of something special.
i guess felling you belong is a basic human need.
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Regehr
Being a JW made me feel like a total asshole (excuse my language). When I stopped going to meetings and I had elders come and visit me..they asked me why and I told them that I feel like we're unfairly putting ourselves above people. The one elders says..and I'll never forget this "Well..we are better than everybody else." I've never felt like I was ever accompishing anything being a JW. I even told my parents "What good does it do anybody?". I just can't stand the brand of self-righteousness that comes with this religion.
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Suggestions on how to properly get disfellowshiped
by IreallydidwalkoutofaKH inhere is how i would like to get df'd.
during the service meeting of cource the announcement would be made.
i would like to walk in the meeting during the song (preferably..."then they will know") leading up to the the announcements and walk to my seat in the front of the kingdom hall dressed as darth vader.
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Regehr
RE: The christmas decorations Idea...
I lol'ed...I could see this Kingdom hall with a giant inflatable Santa Claus on the front lawn. Its an awesome idea for a prank.
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Day 2 Convention Experience
by yknot inso day 2...... paying the piper for yesterday's behavior...... ( http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/163441/1.ashx ).
there was no lecture, no 'look'........just the privilege punishment of cleaning the section and our parents, well placed throughout our section.
it worked like a charm during the morning presentation.
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Regehr
Hahaha..that's a pretty good story.
Man, I think the only thing I really miss is being an attendant at the Conventions...I could get away with not being in my seat for entire sessions at a time. Made the long hours just fly by. I did it like three years straight, then I got reproved in 06..then I've been DF'ed the last two years and haven't gone.
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Wanting to talk to my mom
by lostsheep82 inso now that i've read as much as i could in the last 2 months and made my decision that this isn't the organization i thought it was, i'm scared, terrified, and feel helpless in some ways.
my mom is a devout jw, a pioneer, her husband of the 'anointed', and they are very 'spiritually strong'.
i'm wanting to compile a mini book to send to her with all the reasons and proof from wt books and magazines with quotes and stuff.
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Regehr
Its a rough situation dude...
I've been DF'ed 18 months..and I don't think I've ever heard anything out of my mom except "Ohh I don't want to hear that." Or "We have nothing to talk about then." I can't for the life of me explain myself to her. Its hard, and now it appears that they truly are going to shun me for good. They visited from Alberta last weekend (I Live in Ontario..they moved), and not one phonecall or visit..nothing.
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Apostasy "seeing oneself as a victim denied"
by whereami ini found this on a pro-witness site http://pastorrussell.blogspot.com/2008/07/seeing-onself-as-victim-denied.html.
do you think this is a fair assesment of "apostates"?
i think he fails to see the whole picture.. .
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Regehr
Uhh...isn't this guy going to get counseled for his use of the internet?
Quick, somebody phone his elders!
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Hi...
by Regehr inhi.... uhh...long time lurker, first time poster.
i'm 23 years old, was raised as a jw and was df'ed about eighteen months ago.
look forward to getting to know some of you!.
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Regehr
Thanks for all the welcomes...Here's my story for those who are interested.
Basically, in about October of 2006 I told my parents (I was still living at home at the time) that I was finished with being a Witness for the time being. I wasn't sure at the time whether I intended it to be permanent. But I had alot of nagging doubts, and I didn't think it was right how they told me to prove it to myself without letting me study anything but the Society publications. So I stopped altogether. I met with elders, one on one sort of things for about a month after that. The day after Christmas a good friend of mine was getting married. By that point I had made up my mind that I wasn't going to go back again, and wanted to have one last night of fun with all the people I had grown up with. And I did. Too much fun according to our local elders.
See..In April 2006 I had been publicly reproved for some drug/alcohol related issues. My friend was Disfellowshipped in January of 2006, for the same reasons (He was out for nine months, came back in September). The elders in our hall had made a habit out of watching us like hawks, just waiting to pull people in for every little thing. My friends went to a restaurant/bar type place one night, got jumped by a bunch of thugs...the elders pulled them all into a meeting and blamed them for it. Then they told us not to go into any bars..not even the ones that were apart of regular restaurants (places like Boston Pizza, Montanas etc.). By the time I had quit going, this whole watching us like hawks thing had just pushed me to my breaking point. I was getting counseled every time I went more than four weeks without a haircut!
So anyways, my friends wedding came around. I was drinking of course, pretty steadily throughout the night. I was feeling it, but I wasn't outright hammered. I knew the fallout from this wedding was going to be pretty bad, when an elder blatantly and falsely accused two friends of mine of concealing and drinking alcohol in my friends car. The bottle of booze they had was for the hotel room we had rented (they didn't like that either), and wasn't even unsealed. The elders wife went around to everyone still at the reception telling them that my friends were drinking in the car. The elders questioned me right then and there at the wedding.
Anyways, in the six weeks following the wedding, I had three meetings with elders..the third of which they disfellowshipped me in. They told me that some of my closest friends were not 'good associates', and that the reason I got 'so drunk' at the wedding was because I had fallen away from the congregation and quit listening to the counsel of elders. I told the one elder that his wife was a gossiping slanderer, and that he was out to get all of us because he had just been made an elder and wanted to look good for the congregation (probably not the smartest course in retrospect). The second meeting, they dragged in two kids who saw me the night of the wedding acting all hammered. I had joked with the one kid, because I said something that wasn't audible to him (while completely sober) and said "Yeah, Im drunk." (completely kidding). The elders used this as testimony that I admitted to being drunk. The second kid was an elders son...of one of the elders who was on my committee. The same one who I told that his wife was a slanderous gossiper (definetly wasn't smart now). I basically firebombed the whole thing. I knew I could have gotten out of it if I wanted to. They were trying to force me to go back to meetings. They wanted me to be repentant and prove it by attending meetings again (which by this point I hadn't done in about four months). I wasn't about to have anyone put a 'gun to my head' so to speak. I told them that the entire concept of disfellowshipping is crap, its inhumane, its cruel. Then they said that I was a danger to the congregation with that kind of talk, but somehow when they disfellowshipped me it was all about me being drunk at the wedding. They made their decision, I got up, i walked out..haven't seen them since.
I've had a few friends on the inside still talk to me since. At the same time I was being disfellowshipped (in about February 2007) I met a girl and it went well..so well in fact that about a year after (February 2008)..I married her. Best thing I did since getting out of the JW.
My parents have pretty much shunned me which was unexpected.. In April of this year, they moved to Alberta. I've had precisely one conversation with my mother since then. They even came back just last weekend...and acted like I didn't even exist. No phonecall, no visit, nothing. I figured i wouldn't see them very much, but I didn't think they would go full on hardcore with the shunning. I was wrong. And I think that's about the only thing that hurts about this whole thing. Other than that, Im glad I left...and reading the stories from people on this board, makes me feel like Im not totally alone. My wife has been wonderful through the whole thing. She's stuck by me even though I've been pretty messed up sometimes. Its the one consolation I have, is that I never have to go through it alone.
Hope to get to know some of you. Its good to be free from it...but it sure has cost me.
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Hi...
by Regehr inhi.... uhh...long time lurker, first time poster.
i'm 23 years old, was raised as a jw and was df'ed about eighteen months ago.
look forward to getting to know some of you!.
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Regehr
Hi...
Uhh...Long time lurker, first time poster. I'm 23 years old, was raised as a JW and was DF'ed about eighteen months ago.
Look forward to getting to know some of you!