My compliments to everyone on this thread. This is why I keep on visiting and reading. There's always someone out there who knows how to spell things out with that undeniable flavor of truth, in a way I have not yet heard or read.
Specifically, the posts by Steve and Trevor really make sense, even if they don't exactly say the same thing. Once I figured out that things in the JW world are as Steve says, then I couldn't fake it and go on.
U_B, you may be different. You may find a way to continue on without throwing your life into upheaval.
Trevor really hits home when he says: 'If the illusion we choose to live involves compromise to keep those you love then, it is as good as any. It all depends on whether you can continue to live the way you do and whether leaving would improve your life.'
That's the way it is for me. Sometimes, keeping my family means that I have to be less than honest with them about what I really believe. Sounds horrible, but do you think that all JWs believe their whole doctrine, all of the time? It seems that all of life is the constant perpetuation of falsity. If I ever do have to face God, or whoever, and answer for lying, then at least I did what I did out of LOVE, and I'll take my punishment based on that.
Do what you feel you must do, but remember: you are automatically USELESS to your family once the 'A'-word applies to you. Metatron gives you the most practical advice.
It all comes down to what you can live with. I hope you find peace one way or another. I wish the best for you and your family.