Hi cookiegirlie, here's a link to some info on the cross/stake question. It's a long read, but worth it.
http://www.freeminds.org/doctrine/cross.htm
One thing to think about from that article,
Unless I see in His HANDS the imprint of THE NAILS, and put my finger into the place of THE NAILS, and put my hand into His side, I will not believe. (John 20:25, emphasis added)
Hope that helps,
ig.