Welcome. Guess it's true what I heard. People really are waking up by the boatload--there are an awful lot of new people joining the site. Very good. Very good.
Posts by sd-7
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30Introducing myself
by crazy2try inhi all, i am new to the forum and recently left the witnesses.
i was excited to see this site and enjoyed reading a lot of the posts.
it is nice to read so many of the same thoughts and feelings that i have had over the years.
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70
Transcript Of Judicial Committee Meeting Of Dale & Bette Baker
by Bangalore intranscript of judicial committee meeting of dale & bette baker.. http://www.jehovahswitnessbooks.com/2010/03/judicial-committee-meeting-of-dale.html.
bangalore.
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sd-7
Reminds me of my own committee, except I probably didn't know half of what this guy knew. As usual, the elders dodged the serious, real issues and remained focused on "organization" and basically on getting him to answer a bottom line question so they could DF. It was as if they just wanted to get it over with so they could get on with the business of running the company, if you will. Even to a guy like me, that's cold.
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sd-7
No. Felt lonely while still amongst them--always felt their minds were in a different place than mine, operating on a different wavelength. The notion that "worldly people have nothing in common with us" just never stuck with me. I was never big on having friends inside or outside the religion, so I'm probably a little biased.
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28
Disfellowshipped People Are A Bad Lot
by garyneal ina week prior to my wife being baptized she and i discussed the reasons why people are disfellowshipped.
she says that people are disfellowshipped because they simply want to live their lives the way they want to and no longer submit to god's will.
in other words, they want to do something that is immoral and goes against bible principles.
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sd-7
I'm experiencing the tragic results of this particular idea that has been implanted in the minds of many. My own wife feels so greatly hurt by my decision to walk away from this religion--or get kicked out, I should say--yet I told her just last night that she doesn't even understand WHY she feels that way. Her response was that I didn't acknowledge 'the faithful and discreet slave'. Okay. Well, who are they? Where does this idea of accepting a 'faithful and discreet slave' class as being required for salvation appear anywhere in the Bible?
I told her, through everything, I've been verbally assaulted by my immediate family, my character has been attacked, I've practically watched elders laugh at and consider as irrelevant questionable/false doctrines that are at the core of our belief system, and I've been shunned by everyone I know on the inside. But one thing that hasn't happened? No one, not an elder, not a relative, not anyone, has sat down with me and, using the Bible, proved to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was mistaken. No one. That's all I wanted. If they could do that, I would gladly suit up and continue 'serving Jehovah' (ie. serving the organization). But that didn't happen. I was thrown out.
And for that, I'm the bad guy? I'm the bad lot? Yeah, I made some mistakes, but I know for a fact that the elders didn't ice me for any other reason than my questioning the Society. Period. They had no other real basis, they knew it, I knew it.
It's easier to go with simple platitudes than it is to consider the possibility that 'the truth' might not be what it seems. It's easier to spout the company line and close the door of your mind and get back on the treadmill. It is so easy, but it is more painful than anything else. I tried it. I would know.
I'm just sad to see that this policy in particular has become, not a helpful means of adjusting people when they fall into a pattern of sin, but as a weapon to silence people, to control information. And to abuse people who are already having a hard time if they did sin in some other way, instead of helping them.
That's all I can say. Said too much already.
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sd-7
That would depend on the problem. Actually, for the person contemplating suicide, it is the solution to all of their problems. To the exclusion of all consequences that would survive them, which, generally speaking, a suicidal person would assume to be at most financial and at least nothing apart from extra work for the coroner.
Suicide is A solution. However, there are always alternatives, though they may be unpleasant. A path that seems irrational is still an option, after all. It is merely an irrational one.
Do I think it's the best choice? No. I don't. I think more is to be gained from watching what happens next, even if it's horrible. You're the main character in your story. If you die, the story ends there and you don't get to see all the possible endings that might've come if you'd just waited for them. Don't close the book until you've gotten to the end. Don't end your life until nature or catastrophe ends it for you. Otherwise, you won't really know how it ended.
I had the chance to end my life in 1998. If I had done it then, over a girl, I wouldn't have met the love of my life and married her. I wouldn't have found out I was in a cult and that I could live a different way. I wouldn't have seen a lot of awesome things that came after that year. And I would've regretted it. Though there are moments I look back on that day and wish I'd done it, they're just moments, nothing more. The moments ahead have far more promise.
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9
One definitive article covering Lifton, Hassan, propaganda and cognitive dissonance
by besty inhttp://www.freeminds.org/psychology/mind-control/a-study-of-the-persuasion-techniques-used-by-jehovahs-witnesses-and-the-watchtower.html.
grab yourself a coffee and sit down for 30 minutes of high quality research material covering all the bases.
you may even want to respond to jw apologist 'martin' who has left a comment on there.......
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sd-7
This reminds me of my family intervention. When I mention Lifton's study of thought reform, I was asked by my brother, "Are you a Communist?" Apparently his government clearance doesn't permit him to be associated with Communists. But wait--I was talking about a doctor's evaluation of a thought reform program USED by Communists.
The apologist there, Martin--wow. He makes some valid points, but his mention of the "President" of the Society is a total dodging of the issues. The Governing Body is where the real power lies, not in the President of the Society. And surely he and all JWs have to face it: if the Governing Body teaches something, they have to believe it. Their alternatives are to (1) leave, "Where will you go?" (2) "wait on Jehovah" to fix the error (ie. wait for the GB to fix the error). The only possibility presented to them is that they're just not smart enough to understand it and they just need to go out in FS more and not worry about it. Click Start menu on Brain, then click Shut Down.
I also can't help asking, why would a JW in good standing who believes in the doctrine be visiting FreeMinds.org? He's got some explaining to do for that alone.
I find it hard to imagine, after considering how thought reform and propaganda works, that you could still somehow be unable to recognize it when you see it in the Watchtower. Who could deny it? Well, I guess we know who, those who simply choose to believe what the Society tells 'em. It's not a matter of stupidity, though--it is a matter of ignorance, be it willful or accidental. It happened to all of us.
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75
I'm new here!
by its_me! ini have been reading your posts for 2 weeks now, and i am riveted!
i spend every spare moment on this site.
it has become rather like a drug to me!
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sd-7
Welcome, its_me! I don't have to imagine how emotional you must feel. I just found out over the course of the past year about everything. I'm freshly DF'd for refusing to believe in doctrines I could no longer support in good conscience. Family has been crazy lately, but I'm hanging in there and feeling a lot better than I was when I had to face the congregation and pretend things were okay.
There are some really wonderful people here--along with your usual knuckleheads--so I hope you get to meet as many wonderful people as possible! My only advice is to be careful of your choices. It will be easy to get sucked back in or sucked into a relationship that is just as bad (if you're single). Be mindful of your feelings. Do your homework, find information yourself, convince yourself of what is going on. Knowing that you're not imagining it will take a long time to sink in.
I'm sure someone here has already given you a recommended reading list. But you really have to take your time if you're just starting out with this. Some of the things going on are very upsetting to take in, so...take your time to absorb it all.
We're here for you. You are welcome to send me a PM if you'd like to talk in more detail. Take care!
--Christopher
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15
Fam'ly ambush led to reproach brought on JW brand name
by sd-7 inin the aftermath of the family intervention ambush, i got a phone call from my great uncle (never been a jw).
he told me he'd heard about my wife reading my e-mail and taking it to the elders (although she didn't actually show them the e-mail, just reported its contents).
apparently, my grandmother told him about it.
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sd-7
They simply don't seem to get (or care) that they're expecting you to live a lie and keep your mouth shut, all for the glory of making their lives convenient.
Dead on, Mary. They did indeed emphasize the whole 'losing your family' thing--particularly tried employing my new marriage as a weapon. What, with all the "people who care" about me so much, I'm just overwhelmed! Right. It was all about 'the organization', nothing more. And that's tragic. Here I thought that doing the right thing rather than what's convenient was what we were all about!
Try to get back in touch with that very kind, patient, forgiving and sweet man so many of us clearly discern from your previous posts after you give yourself a little more time to grieve, fume, and simmer/stew over the absolute needlessness of the situation.
Good idea. I've always worried he might have died by now. Maybe not. I hope not.
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Catholic pedophilia issue reaches new levels...makes me wonder about JWs
by sir82 inhere is the latest on the catholic child rape scandal:.
http://www.slate.com/id/2247861/?from=rss.
the great catholic cover-upthe pope's entire career has the stench of evil about it.by christopher hitchens.
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sd-7
At this point, might as well DF people for "causing divisions" if they're seen slicing a loaf of bread. That's such a stupid charge and always the go-to when they have no real charge to submit.
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88
It's official--I'm out.
by sd-7 in"sd-7 is no longer one of jehovah's witnesses.".
i always imagined this day would come.
i'm not sure exactly how i knew.
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sd-7
Thanks, Mary. I'm surprised to find that this really happened to me. I'm so used to being pushed around that I never imagined I would take a stand like this. I mean, I suppose I did have a choice, and could've backed down, but...I really did reach a point where it was unbearable. My belief that this religion isn't the true one is something I'm willing to stake my life on.
The peculiar irony of it all is that we were taught all the time to be different, to be unconventional, to stand alone even when everybody else seems to be on the right path. And when the chips were really down, so many just ended up with a 'follow-the-crowd' mentality. I always believed in having a moral code that was separate from any group's ideas. Because I believe there is a moral code that is pure instinct in us all--we can inherently look at a situation and see injustice, see wrongs that need to be righted.
So I wasn't necessarily afraid of being alone. My mom said that, but...if I'm alone and it's because of pursuing truth, I'd rather be alone. There were thoughts even in the back of her mind that this could be a cult. Certainly when they give you a mysterious instruction and you're supposed to blindly obey, that's got to be a warning sign.
I've got something--and it's not just Internet friends or whatever. I have my mind back. I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders once it all became clear. I think, looking back, it was worth every sacrifice, to get that. If I offered this choice to myself in the past, I know I would have made the same decision. Because it's better to know, to question orders, than to go along with them and pay the price of your conscience.
I never thought of it as taking courage, though. For me, it was just the logical end result of a series of abuses. Figured something was wrong, just never imagined all my instincts could be so thoroughly confirmed. But...I think I've said it all before. Perhaps will suffice.