Posts by GLTirebiter

23

This gave me the rage

by Marmite in

jw
friends

picture the situation:.

a jw sister, let's call her marjorie, has a non jw father who died.

she arranges for an elder to take the funeral at a crematorium and marjorie's non-jw husband pays for a reception at a pub afterwards.. marjorie has a disassociated son.

GLTirebiter

A JW sister, let's call her Marjorie, has a non JW father who died. She arranges for an elder to take the funeral at a crematorium

That is the root of the problem. Why is she arranging a JW funeral for her non-JW father? It is presumptious and disrepectful of her to do that. It is disrepectful to her father, it is disrespectful to her husband, and it is disrespectful to the grandson.

The funeral home director knows how to arrange a service and who could officiate in a manner consistent with the beliefs of the deceased (or lack thereof). That is what they do for a living!

The elder taking the funeral tells Marjorie that she needs to tell her son he is not welcome at the reception, otherise none of the JWs can attend.

At this point it would be appropriate to tell the arrogant hypocrite that his presence is disturbing to family members in their time of grief, therefore he is not welcome!

The son goes anyway

Good for him! His grandfather's funeral is for the family's solace, not a command performance for the Board of Elders.

32

An update on the wife

by sooner7nc in

i just wanted to let you all know that my wife is feeling great after receiving her kidney transplant last week.

her labs immediately started coming into line as soon as the organ was attached and as of now are almost completely normal.

she's obviously having a little pain and soreness from the huge incision they made but overall she's feeling wonderful.

GLTirebiter

That's good news. Thank you for the updates, Sooner!

17

Breach of contract

by PYRAMIDSCHEME in

jw
friends

as my journey to leave the wbts was in its infancy i was speaking to an old friend who had always been a surrogate mom to me.

i had pioneered with both her sons (one of which is now an elder, the other is gay).

i was addressing some of my concerns re: the wts.

GLTirebiter

...so in the end she said, "Remember. You signed on the dotted line."

Consider whether this arrangement meets basic expectations of honesty, decency and fairness. If that baptism really was a contract (I point I do not concede), then:

How old were you at the time? Were you of legal to enter a contract (now 18 years in the US, and 21 years for many older members)?
Were all the terms of the contract fully disclosed in advance? Or were significant conditions and requirements not revealed until after you "signed on the dotted line"?
Was the contract entered voluntarily, as a genuine "meeting of the the minds"? Or was there pressure and cooercion to accept it?
Were you allowed, even encouraged, to do due diligence on the deal and consult your own independent expert? Or were you urged to trust only those offering the deal and to act quickly, "before it's too late"?
Was there a reasonable quid pro quo offered? Or was it a one-sided agreement, in favor of those making the offer?

If that baptism was a contract, it was the sort offered by a disreputable used-car lot looking for a fast score and a quicker getaway, not an honest dealer who is looking for a long-term, mutually beneficial relationship.

23

Men's Age, as Determined by a Trip to Home Depot

by FlyingHighNow in

i laughed til i cried and my sides ached.

whoever wrote this is a comic genius.

it gets funnier as it goes.

GLTirebiter

Thanks skeeter!

43

Why do you post here?

by MrFreeze in

jw
friends

so, why do you post here?.

do you post here because you are currently trapped in the jw's?.

do you post here to help those currently trapped?.

GLTirebiter

Do you post here just because you share a like-mindedness with others who post here?

Some of them, yes. Also to understand what's going in the lives and minds of the Ex and kids.

23

Men's Age, as Determined by a Trip to Home Depot

by FlyingHighNow in

i laughed til i cried and my sides ached.

whoever wrote this is a comic genius.

it gets funnier as it goes.

GLTirebiter

More stereotypes for Saturday morning...

Men's marital status, as determined by the things they say during a trip to Home Depot:

Single: Though he came to get a faucet handle, now he's browsing the tool aisle, eyeing the top-of-the-line selections. Hey, this is a lifetime investment, not some piece of cheap throw-away junk. "That is so cool! I need one of these!"
Engaged/newlywed: Easy to spot, because she's with him. They're out together picking designer paint colors, wallpaper, and other decorating items for their first home together. "Yes, honey, I think we can afford that!"
Married: He's got the kids in tow and carries a shopping list (not in his own handwriting). Periodically pulls out the cell phone and dials. "Darling, they don't have that one in the ad. The other brand costs $20 more. Can we afford it?"
Newly separated: Scrounges the bargain and sale bins looking for the lowest priced household items for his empty apartment. Pulls out his wallet and counts the cash three times to see if it's enough. "Can't write a check, because payday isn't until Friday."
Divorced: Resembles "single", but he's older, has a shopping list (in his own handwriting), and sticks to the mid-range brands. Sighs while passing up the deluxe DeWalt set, picks up the plain vanilla Makita instead. "I could have bought two DeWalts with that last alimony check!"
Long married: You won't see him. His son-in-law is doing the job--that's him at the check-out stand reserved for contractors. "No weekend off for me. Need to fix up the in-laws' kitchen before the holidays."
Widowed: Carefully carries a swatch of faded, peeled wallpaper. Asks the clerk to help special-order this same outdated, discontinued floral pattern. "I know it's old, but I have to find some more. It was Dolores' favorite!"

50

Don't you DARE to get up!!

by stillin9 in

interesting points from this week's wt study (dec 15 2010 study edition):.

par 12: "do i encourage my children not to view the song between the theocratic ministry school and the service meeting or the one between the public talk and the watchtower study as a sort of intermission,an opportunity for them to leave their seats unnecessarily, perhaps just to stretch their legs?".

why do they have to make such a big deal out of everything?

GLTirebiter

- two-thirds of young people raised as JWs leave and never come back...

Yes, the cloud does have a silver lining!

34

its my bday n still cant celebrate it.... n i cant post from my phone sorry

by cyberjesus in

GLTirebiter

Happy birthday, CJ, if nothing else, at least raise a toast to another year of freedom!

30

hey.......Hello

by Snowboarder in

jw
friends

hey what's up everone?

i'm new to here.

it took a while for me to get this hard feelings out of my system....yup....i'm 18 and i'm on my last year of high school...this year i'm taking it online i don't mind it's ok..i do miss the people at school..as u know my parents r jw and i'm one too...i am very active and i do it all for my parents and to avoid confllict but recenlty i just don't like some of bans no what u can and can't do...i'm behind on school beacuse i reg pio...i'm a active person...i really want to leave this reglion beacuse one i can't visit my family grandparents and cousins in europe beacuse they "worldly"....this for me is bs...so stupid....it's my family... if i do leave the jw it's not like i'm going to do drugs and drink or smoke...my goals r to be in the olympics and to start snowboard cross...i'm going to join a snowboard club next season....i don't care anymore about what people think...it's not like i'm doing something bad..it's something that will bring me joy....today my mom was questioning me like crazy about my new jw friend that i ski with....there was a friend of a friend last year that i hang out once with he was a so called good exmaple but he quit the jw and started drinking and smoking so...yup he's dumb...now my mom is like questioning every i associate with..i hardly have any friends and my life sucks..i want to make it better by snowboard more...i'm allowed to go every secound day as long as i prepair for the crappy propangda meetings....ya...support is hard when my parents don't support my dreams but when i do get in the olympics u have only myself to thank beacuse every time i pratice i have bad snowboard days and good i feel like crying at the mountain my heart breaks i want to be faster and better...i want to be the best.. i told my mom i want to be the best snowboarder out there for snowboard cross and she was like humble yourself and all this jw crap...i just don't know how to put it into words.....it's like a backworkd train...i tried to a last attemt at this jw by trying to join a foriegn group...but it failed bad and that was like the straw that broke my back...years of holding my back of trainnign and being active is making me to go crazy ....it's hard i'm just trying to get my pain out when u fall on your snowborad u have to encorage your self u have to train your self u have to push yourself..i wish i could start life all over agian...the war in my country runid a large part and now this....when ur younger u don't know better and this relgion seems good but when u age and watch the olympics like i do and then watch it live...i got a job at the vanoc thing so i was there...it's a different experience to race ....my country did not do so well and i wish i could represent them and get a gold medal....u know it would make my life better....and bring hope to tons of people facing the same story as me....i was a jw from when i was 10 so i kindof miss chirstmas and holidays but i don't care anymore.....my dad came home talk latter.

GLTirebiter

First, welcome to the board. This one is more of a mental and emotional workout than a physical one, but like snowboarding it's spiritually rewarding if you bring the right attitude!

I'm behind on school beacuse i reg pio

Do something about that. Don't short-change yourself by compromising your education. You have only a few months left, so just do what you must to get the most out of your high school years.

62

Abusive Women and manipulation

by Lady Lee in

the other day we were talking about abusive mothers (toxic relationships).

i was sent this link today and think it is worth sharing.

i think it is an excellent article.

GLTirebiter

Lee, great topic! Would you agree that this behavior is a version of emotional terrorism?

"An additional factor, making the terrorist so dangerous, is the fact that the terrorist, while in positively monomaniacal pursuit of her goal, feels fueled by a sense of omnipotence. Perhaps it is true that one imagines oneself omnipotent when, in truth, one is in a position of impotence (as in the case of losing one's familial control through dissolution). Whatever the source of the sensation of omnipotence, the terrorist believes herself to be unstoppable, and unbound by the constraints or conscience or empathy, believes that no cost (cost, either to the terrorist or to other family members) is too great to pay toward the achievement of the goal."

"To limit the terrorist's feelings of omnipotence, there are many effective measures. The guiding principle, as in the handling of political terrorists, must be: "There is no negotiating with terrorists." Endless telephone calls, conversations, confrontation, trial "get-back-togethers," correspondence, visitations, gestures of appeasement, and efforts to placate the terrorist's demands, all serve to reinforce the terrorist's belief that she is accomplishing something. Only determined resolution in the face of terrorism shows the terrorist that her power is limited.

Like physical aggression, emotional and verbal abuse must be stopped before infects the next generation.