Your wife was flattered by his obvious regard for her and allowed herself to take this further and her actions show recklessness and selfishness. If she wants the marriage to work she has used this other man and played with his emotions in order to fuel her feelings of self worth. she has given this man false hopes and he may find her sudden change of heart confusing and frustrating. Certainly this is not going to make the work situation easier and he may feel that persistence will get him what he wants. She seriously needs to find alternative employment as she has ruined her work relationships and needs to put you first.
The elders may take pity on her having an unbelieving husband but seeing as she planned for some of this to happen and dressed provocatively they may be less forgiving. However at some point they may convince her that this is all your fault. It is important that you get professional help to work your way through this. The elders are going to make a bad situation worse mainly because they are not equipped to deal with anything beyond their narrow remit. It is important to be open and honest with one another and remember that you both have choices.
I am very sorry to hear this has happened.