Thanks for sharing your experience.
It's awful to see this shunning going on and especially so in front of children.
I'd say that to avoid this, instead of DA'd a publisher can just write a letter to the body of elders and say that you no longer want to be in the So-and-So congregation but this in no way means that you are Disassociating yourself from the fellowship of other Jehovah's Witnesses. You are leaving the congregation because you no longer wish to be downtrodden by those who are appointed men in the congregation and should be treating you as a sheep who needs comfort and care instead you have found some of them to be the total opposite. Therefore you do not want them contacting you ever again about your decision to leave the So-and-So congregation and reserve your right to become a member of another congregation if you wish.
Once you have stated in writing that you do not wish to be in that congregation. They have no legal or doctrinally enforceable recourse. They better leave you alone or there are legal cases (at least in the U.S.) that make for a legal precedent whereby a former member of a religious congregation cannot be harassed by having the congregation take punitive sanctions like excommunicating, disassociating or disfellowshipping the ex-member. Because the ex-member is no longer under the religious oversight of that congregation under the eyes of the law.
The most important thing to put in the letter is that you will SUE THE WHOLE BOE if there is any sort of announcement against you which will be considered as putting you in a bad light, and question your character, in the eyes of your former congregation brothers and sisters.
When done this way, you aren't DA'ed or DF'ed and they won't dare take action against you since the Legal Dept. at HQ in Bethel will tell them they're on their own on this one. It's like... going beyond the gate on a NO TRESPASSING sign. So wave your DON'T TREAD ON ME symbolic flag, no need to DA, and just leave the congregation and threaten to sue the elders if they dare do anything to badmouth you.