Posts by donnye

9

Do elders who get disfellowshipped blab about judicial committee's they served on?

by donnye in

has anyone ever worried about confessing something to the elders, only to find that they spend the next 25 years worrying that if those elders in 'the know' leave the organisation or get disfellowshipped, maybe they couldn't care less about making your misdemeanor public knowledge.

"if i'm going down, i'll take everyone i can with me".. i still worry about this scenario, and even though two of the elders in my case have died of old age, i will only feel really relieved once the last one does.. maybe current elders blab about the congregation members too.

i sincerely hope they would be too scared to do this in case there is an official complaint made against them for defamation of character and breaking a fellow believers confidence..

donnye

Has anyone ever worried about confessing something to the elders, only to find that they spend the next 25 years worrying that if those elders in 'the know' leave the organisation or get disfellowshipped, maybe they couldn't care less about making your misdemeanor public knowledge. i.e. "if I'm going down, I'll take everyone I can with me".

I still worry about this scenario, and even though two of the elders in my case have died of old age, I will only feel really relieved once the last one does.

Maybe current elders blab about the congregation members too. I sincerely hope they would be too scared to do this in case there is an official complaint made against them for defamation of character and breaking a fellow believers confidence.

12

How did you respond?

by Simon Morley in

jw
friends

we have not attended any meetings for several months now as we continue our fade.

how have you dealt with the nosey parkers who hold the territory that you live in and insist on "dropping by".

first it was the family that holds the card and then a coule of other familes as they work our territory.. i am tired of not answering the door (they know we are home) and need a cute but not revealing comeback to the "we miss you at the meetings" line.

donnye

I always used to answer the door to everyone. Then brother and sister slander saw me in the street and accused me of not answering the door to their knocks. From then on I don't answer the door unless I am expecting someone.

Now, when they and others see me in the street and ask nosey parker questions, I advise them to meditate on 1 Peter 4 v 15 - "let no-one suffer as a busybody". That leaves them speechless and I say goodbye. LOL.

12

An Elder That Helped Me

by dontplaceliterature in

has anyone in this forum ever had an elder in the organization discuss "apostate" teachings with them in a non-threatening, mutually enlightening way?

obviously, there are many of you who have talked with elders about "apostate" ideas, and have been disfellowshipped/disciplined for it.

that's not really what i'm interested in hearing about in this thread, no offense.

donnye

Unfortunately not. An elder rang me up after me being AWOL for about 6 months, and asked me if I was going to come back. I replied "well the thing is, I have some issues with the truth that I need to get my head round". His response? "ok then, bye". I was actually rather hurt that he didn't want to give me any assistance in order to see me back at the meetings. He obviously thought I wasn't worth it.

A month later another elder came round, because his wife had told him that he had missed my telephone call. I was miffed he had come round without his wife or anyone else, but needed to speak to him, so left the door wide open. When he sat down I said "I know I have not been at the meetings for 7 months but I have some issues with the truth that I need to get my head round". His response? "well I haven't come round to speak about that". He then started going on about the problems he was having in the bedroom department with his wife. At this point I showed him the door, and made it clear that I won't be asking for his help again.

109

Your most memorable Kingdom Hall meeting disruptions!

by easyreader1970 in

jw
friends

i remember about twenty years ago some teenagers were caught fornicating in one of the additional schools.

the schools were downstairs, essentially separated from the rest of the kh.

they weren't just happened upon, though.

donnye

An old brother in front of me fell asleep, and two elders picked him up by his chair, and carried him out. They must have thought he was giving a bad witness, being sent to sleep by the speaker. LOL

7

Erasing Bad Memories

by cameo-d in

jw
friends

perhaps in the future, people will become more "zombie-fied" and the masses be easier to control.

less effort to put forth in mind control games.. .

study takes step toward erasing bad memories.

donnye

I just found your post about erasing bad memories and it is very interesting reading.

I was suicidally depressed for years because of something bad that happened years previously, and was taking citalopram for the depression. However, I still felt fearful all the time - as if I was about to be beheaded. Eventually, the doctor said that to make the citalopram work better, he was going to prescribe me propranolol too, because it would help with the fearful feelings. It did!!!! Within 2 months I was a happy little bunny, and stopped taking the meds altogether after 6 more months. That was in 2008 and I am still smiling! I count myself a very fortunate individual indeed. :-)

57

To all lurking JW elders

by Mickey mouse in

jw
friends

come on in, the water's fine.

you may even realise you have close friends and family here.

.

donnye

curiousconfused - I enjoyed reading your post and you seem extremely intelligent and fair. No-one here has dragged me to 'the other side' and I have felt relief at getting things off my chest without being grassed up, while at the same time giving my own experiences which I hope can help someone else to be strong and not be bullied by some of the more controlling elders. I feel alot more peace within myself, and this has made me much closer to Jah, so I am going to try to get to the public talk every week from now on.

Take care.

49

Can't believe I am doing this

by rockmehardplace in

jw
friends

i am shocked i am even writing this.

for about a year or so, i have hid in the darkness peeking at this site and following everyone else's story.

i have learned more than i expected from so many.

donnye

VIII Your comment - "Thanks for sharing and with every post you make you'll feel a little bit better."

This is really true for me. Posting comments on subjects that hit a nerve and are important to me, is actually making me feel at peace again with Jah. I guess it is the relief of 'getting things off my chest' without being grassed up to the elders for having a different viewpoint to them. I am no longer angry with God - He must be miffed with the elders who were intent on bullying me into doing whatever makes life easier for them, too.

47

Finally received our "shepherding call" today

by Jourles in

jw
friends

it was inevitable.

after dodging the bullet for a few weeks, the elders finally made their way to our house today.

the reason i think this to be so, is because he asked me what he should write down for my report.

donnye

I know I am years late on this post, but after 2 and a half years of not going to congregation meetings, I got a phone call the other day, from an elder. He said he hadn't seen me out and about lately (I thought What? and you have only just noticed after 2 and a half years?). Then he asked "can we come round and give you some encouragement?" I replied no thankyou. There was a pregnant pause and then he said ok then but I will ring you again in the future. I thanked him soooooo much for his thoughtfulness. LOL

41

Lying about divorce reason to be allowed to re-marry

by Big Softie in

i know my view on this but would be interested to see what anyone else thinks.. .

at a court hearing recently my estranged wife, who left me (i'm not jw) asked me if i would be prepared to lie to her elders and state that i had committed adultery (i didn't) so that she would be allowed to "get on in her faith".

this from a woman who before she left got intimate (emotionally, i'm not sure about physically) with two "sisters", one of whom took to buying her large bunches of red roses and basicaly furnished her new house for her.. now my view is that she has clearly stated and put in writing that the marriage ended because of my unreasonable behaviour (i.e.

donnye

If the stress of her pressurizing you to lie to the elders is driving you nuts, tell her that you are going to write to her elders about her bizarre request, and will send a copy to Bethel. Keep a copy for the courts too - you may need it to prove her 'unreasonable behaviour'. Probably she will back off and not bother you again.

41

Lying about divorce reason to be allowed to re-marry

by Big Softie in

i know my view on this but would be interested to see what anyone else thinks.. .

at a court hearing recently my estranged wife, who left me (i'm not jw) asked me if i would be prepared to lie to her elders and state that i had committed adultery (i didn't) so that she would be allowed to "get on in her faith".

this from a woman who before she left got intimate (emotionally, i'm not sure about physically) with two "sisters", one of whom took to buying her large bunches of red roses and basicaly furnished her new house for her.. now my view is that she has clearly stated and put in writing that the marriage ended because of my unreasonable behaviour (i.e.

donnye

Big Softie - I apologise for calling your estranged wife a lowlife - that was unkind and unnecessary. She might be lovely, just very desperate.

peacefulpete - I didn't realise men like you existed, willing to allow yourself to be wronged in order for your ex to be happy with someone else. No wonder you got back together again :-)