Posts by jukief

2

Sacrifices of spouses/families of exJW teachers

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

i have tears in my eyes now after reading jukief's posts about the sacrifices that alan has made to teach us all so much.

i remember when i made my first tentative post almost 2 years ago on h2o asking questions about custody issues and jw spouses.

alan was the first person who answered my inquiries, offering references for me to look at.

jukief

Hi Es.

I'm sorry that my post upset you. I shouldn't really said those things. It's only occasionally that I get upset about this. But I think you make a valid point; the children can be the ones who suffer. In our case, Alan's daughter has had a rough time with her JW mother. When his daughter decided she didn't want to be a JW anymore and wanted to come live with her apostate father (oh horrors) and his apostate wife, her mother pretty much abandoned her. So she's already lost one parent to the religion and it's really not fair that she lose another one.

Alan and I have discussed this many, many times over the years we've been together. I know how difficult it is for him. He feel *obligated* to help people, and he gets a lot of satisfaction from it. But at the same time, I see his daughter's pain, and she has been pretty vocal lately about how much she hates all this JW business. It's really hard to know what to do, especially right now when so much is happening in the fight against the WTS. To his credit, Alan has been making a special effort to spend more time with his daughter.

I think it's very difficult to strike a balance. All any of us can do is try. For my part, I need to try to make up for my stepdaughter's loss of a mother and her father's busy schedule by giving her more attention myself. And I'm trying to do so, even though I am dealing with health problems right now.

I think we're all in the same boat. Life is busy and complicated. The one thing I *do* feel good about is that my stepdaughter doesn't have to suffer through her teenaged years as a JW. I constantly remind her of that, too. :-)

132

100 Good Samaritans needed

by Trilobite in

jw
friends

two of this board's, and h2o's before it,long time and well known participants have fallen on desperately hard times.

if they could set up pay pal accounts and enough of us could contribute say $20 - $50 per month it would help them though their hardship.. these two people have helped many escape from the wts and i know for sure have given money and other material help to those in need, even when they could not afford it.. if you can help, send an email to: [email protected].

you need not include any particulars of who you are etc, just an indication that you could support this and how much you could send.

jukief

I haven't been on the board for a few days, and just now took a look at these threads about Farkel and Maximus. I was disgusted by Waiting's comment about the regulars on the board (including my husband) not helping out, and Prisca's agreement. You don't know anything at all about what Alan has done, but I can tell you that not only does he devote almost every minute of his spare time to this work (and his family suffers for it), but he also helped MANY people financially. And I have the checkbook to prove it.

Just because people don't run around blowing their own horns doesn't mean they aren't doing things in private. Think before you speak.

Waiting, I see that you posted an "apology" but I didn't think it sounded very sincere. I might be making too much of this, but you have no idea how much our family has sacrificed to this JW crusade--and I'm not just talking about money. It's a very sore point with me.

3

Let's Have a UN Timeline!

by Dogpatch in

i want to have a timeline on this un stuff, especially since 1991, complete with their anti-un quotes as well as the little acts of prosititution along the way.

i will put it up on my site as can others, and i want to print it in booklet form.

anyone have the time?

jukief

Boy, if someone had time to do that, it'd be great. I don't read the board every day, and today I wanted to send a note to an ex-JW friend telling him about this UN thing. I thought--oh, it's easy. I'll just go back and find the relevant posts. Much more difficul than I thought!! Do you know how many posts this subject has generated? :-) It'd be really great to have a concise synopsis.

Julie

20

U.S. Citizenship Test: Could You Pass?

by closer2fine in

jw
friends

http://encarta.msn.com/quiz/quiz.asp?quizid=14 .

closer.

mean people produce.

jukief

Don't feel bad, Seeker. I got them all correct, too, although I admit I guessed on a couple of questons.

5

Who was the Overseer caught with prostitutes?

by bj in

jw
friends

makena1 spoke about a co who was a fan of the detroit pistons and he went on:"this same co (perhaps a do years later) was removed because he was caught or finally admitted that he had been consorting with prostitutes.

apparently he paid for this from gifts given to him by wealthier brothers.

does this ring a bell for anyone?

jukief

Wasn't that Jimmy Swaggart? Oops. Wrong religion.

46

I NEED ADVICE DESPERATELY!!!

by concerned fiance in

jw
friends

here is my situation: my fiance is now 27 years old.

he was raised as a jw from the age of 2 through 18. at that time, his whole family left the "truth" except for his older brother who had already married another woman from the faith.

for the past 9 years, he has been living his life to the fullest, but still loving god, praying often and he is a truly honest and moral person.

jukief

Who cares? Maybe there are newbies here who haven't seen those posts. It doesn't hurt to revisit the topic.

20

children of the watchtower

by kdk in

jw
friends

i have an 8yr old step-daughter caught up in the madness of the jws through unrelenting fear based brainwashing by her mother.

my husband and i would like to know if anyone has been in a similar situation and is able to help us let her know that there is another more loving way of living in this world.

its frightening to see the damage my husbands ex is doing to this inocent little girls mind.

jukief

We had a good outcome in our family. Alan's daughter was being raised by her finatical JW mother, and after all of us moved to different places (we were even out of the country for a while), we only got to see her a few times a year. We didn't say too much to her directly about the Witnesses, but there were many times our apostate friends visited (including some of those horrid Nowegians), :-) She also went with us to visit friends like Jim Penton and Richard Rawe. I know she heard a lot, and my sister was worried that hearing us and our friends put down the Witnesses would be too traumatic for her. But when she was 14 she surprised us by telling us she didn't want to be a Witness any longer and that she wanted to come live with us.

Don't give up hope. Just show her by example that you are good, decent, loving people, and as she gets older she may be able to see things for herself.

Julie

2

Therapy or Another Religion?

by Victor_E in

jw
friends

while there may be some exceptions the majority of ex jws that leave or that are dfed suffer from deep emotional wounding from their jw experience.

what choices does a person have being in this situation and what are the long-term consequences of their decisions?.

do nothing: this in and of itself is a choice.

jukief

I did two of the things you list, well, sort of.

1) I went to therapy for about a year. It helped a lot.

2) I joined a non-religion--the UUs. UU isn't really a religion because it doesn't have any dogma and its members include Christians and atheists (and everything inbetween), but it does replace that empty hole left by lack of fellowship and wanting to be part of a group. I like their community spirit and desire to help others. Of course, I haven't gone to a UU meeting in a long time, but that's the great part about it--I don't have to feel guilty if I don't go.

Julie F

46

I NEED ADVICE DESPERATELY!!!

by concerned fiance in

jw
friends

here is my situation: my fiance is now 27 years old.

he was raised as a jw from the age of 2 through 18. at that time, his whole family left the "truth" except for his older brother who had already married another woman from the faith.

for the past 9 years, he has been living his life to the fullest, but still loving god, praying often and he is a truly honest and moral person.

jukief

Hi, and welcome to the board.

I'm so sorry to hear your story; I'm afraid that many JWs and ex-JWs have reacted this way to the terrorist attacks. Others who are more knowledable than me can take on the subject of peace and security. I'd like to respond to your post in general.

I left the Witnesses way back in 1984; I had a lot of doubts and although I hadn't done any deep studying, I knew things weren't right and didn't make sense. But I had, in the back of my mind, the worry that I'd done the wrong thing, that maybe the Witnesses were right and that my kids would die at Armageddon because of my decision. Do you know what finally put those thoughts to rest for me? (And for many other ex-JWs?) Reading Ray Franz's two books: Crisis of Consience and In Search of Christian Freedom. Ray goes into great detail about JW teachings and the way the organization is run. After reading two books, I don't see how your fiance could still believe the Witnesses are right about the Armageddon predictions. Please try to get him to read the books. You can order them from several different places, including FreeMinds.org and Amazon.

I wish you luck, and I hope you can convince your fiance that the Witnesses are wrong, wrong, wrong about this--both for your sake and for his.

Best wishes,
Julie

9

Tick list for establishing whether a cult or not..

by Deacon in

jw
friends

1/.milieu control: control of the group environment and communication .

2/.manipulation: leaders are perceived as being chosen by god, history or some supernatural force.

salvation can only be attained through the cult .

jukief

Deacon, I'm at work and can't get to my library. Is this list from Steven Hassen's "Combatting Cult Mind Control?"

Thanks!