Posts by jurs

11

How I Married A Borg

by Ray Skyhorse in

ive been posting for about a month now.

ive finally finished writing about my life.

its long and complicated.

Sorry it took so long to respond , I haven't been at my computer in a while.
I was in the org. a total of 10 years. 7 years baptized and I studied before that for 3 years.
My husband never opposed me going to meetings and never questioned any of my beliefs.
I think your smart knowing that you can't come on too strong, if you do it will backfire.
I thought I'd throw out an idea for you to try. In your wifes books, there is a maroon book called The Greatest Man who ever lived.
Turn to chapter 86. Its called the story of a lost son. Read it. Read it several times. Jehovah's witnesses do not welcome back repent wrong doers as Jesus illustrated the father of the son doing. When someone has been disfellowshipped and they repent. They are still shunned when they come to the kingdom hall. Its not until elders decide that he has shown repentance by their actions and it is announced that the wrongdoer will then be talked to. I think its a strong point. It reached my heart when it was pointed out by the poster Mulan.
As a suggestion, perhaps after you have read the chapter and you feel confident that you know what you are talking about, bring the The Greatest Man book to bed with you and your bible. Turn to that chapter and read it . Likely she'll be surprised to see you reading it and she'll probably make a comment about it . She might ask why you are reading it. Tell her you are interested in the life of Jesus. Perhaps tell her that you've already read this paticular story and it moved you. The word pictures of the story gripped your heart. Imagine how overjoyed the father was and how the son must have appreciated his fathers complete forgiveness. Then in a very innocent way ask her how Jehovah's witnesses are to wrong doers. Ask her to explain the shunning. Ask in a humble and non threatning way. Do your best to look like your truly trying to understand. Give the impression that your open to her beliefs. Make sure you LISTEN to her. Nod your head. Look like your giving a lot of thought to any of her answers. Then gently point out that immediately the father forgave his son and that the Pharisees were critical of mercy shown to sinners.
She may try to convice you that it really is loving to shun unrepentant wrongdoers. She may tell you that when they are repentant they will be welomed back. Ask her if they are welcomed back right away. Mention that you have heard that they have to go to meetings and show their repentance before it is announced that they are reinstated. Is that how Jesus illustration was ?
If at any point you sense her getting defensive back down.... Tell her you are not trying to upset her, you just want to know what God really thinks. Point out that it doesn't matter what Catholics think or what JW's think or what either of the 2 of you think but what God thinks. ( thats a brownie point ) JW's use that line all the time. When she makes a point tell her that her point is interesting and that you'll think about it but your still uncomfortable that it doesn't seem like Jesus would handle it like that, but maybe your wrong. ACT HUMBLE.....
Anyhow, this is just a suggestion. Its a simple subject that might be good to start off with.
Keep us informed.

Jurs

27

My Story

by Commie Chris in

ive been lurking hear for a few weeks.

heres my story:.

i was raised in a catholic family in toronto and went to catholic schools until grade 9 (age 13).

jurs

Hi Chris,

I wanted to say hello.
I use to think it was so honorable that JW's were never told why ones were DF"d. Since I've left and have read stories like yours , I'm suspiscious. If we only knew how hypocritical and ridiculous these meeting with elders were, many JW's would have bolted for the door more qickly.
I'm glad you shared your story. There are many Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb elder stories out there. I always enjoy reading them.
Jurs

13

Judicial Elder wisdom LOL

by Shane in

i got to go into the star chamber a few years ago, i remember when the elders handling the my case told me and they all seemed to be in agreement with stupid remark: " now bro., i want you to go out and do everything you always wanted to do, and get it out of your system before you come back to us wanting reinstatement!

i was disgusted, i said: wait just a dam min your all supposed to encourage me not to sin and guide me inn ways of righteousness, instead your telling me to go out and sin?

i then said: "something's not right here, if there is a god someone will pay one day for mistreating one of his sheep.. question friends has anyone ever had the borg mp's ever say that to you?

jurs

Hi Shane,

WOW, What an awful thing for them to say. I don't think most elders are like that but there definately are some very bad ones...
Lucky for you that you met one. If thats what it took to get you to see that somethings not right, its a blessing in disquise. I also wanted to say hi and welcome.

jurs

11

How I Married A Borg

by Ray Skyhorse in

ive been posting for about a month now.

ive finally finished writing about my life.

its long and complicated.

jurs

Dear Ray,

I'm here to offer you some encouragement. I feel hopeful about your wife. The #1 reason is that she was not raised as a JW.
In order to get her out you must be very careful. JW's are very paranoid about "satan" triing to pull them away from Jehovah.
I too was not raised in the org and married to a non JW. If my husband would have expressed concern and said there were a few issues troubling him, I would have gladly gone over it. I would be delighted that maybe something would reach his heart. Choose just 1 or 2 points at a time and be laid back about it. plant little seeds of truth but not too strongly. I think its best to use scriptural points at first rather than get into the history right away. Really know what your talking about first. Go get out of her book bag the small brown book called "reasoning from the scriptures". That way you will know how she will respond to any of the questions you will bring up. If you need help on what scritures will back up your point, come and post it. We'll help ya !!!!
This is just a suggestion. You know your wife best. I hope things work out for you both.
jurs

5

My Father-In-Law was a pedophile & JW

by Not Perfect in

jw
friends

i know that amazing has gotten our input on how many victims/.

perps we might/did know.

i am here to say that i suspected my .

jurs

Good Gravy, I'm on fire now !!!

What about making a big Poster and nailing it by a telephone post by the local kingdom halls. I think its legal because people post yard sale signs and work from home type signs.
I'm sure the JW's would tear them down but since its cheap I could keep putting them up.
For all you smarties or legal eagles out there is this ok to do? Would it be considered slander or something ? Is it ok to advertise a web address?

jurs
jurs

5

My Father-In-Law was a pedophile & JW

by Not Perfect in

jw
friends

i know that amazing has gotten our input on how many victims/.

perps we might/did know.

i am here to say that i suspected my .

jurs

I'm not sure if this is a good idea or not, but what about making small posters and putting them up in grocery stores. (ya know how grocery stores have bulletin boards where you can put a poster up to sell something. )
It could read something like this:
Support group for Ex -JW's,
Have you been a victim of sexual abuse?
Wether you have been or just want to talk to former JW's
Its on the internet, here's the site, No one will know your identity.
And then give this web site address.
Most sexual abuse happens to women and all JW women shop at the grocery store. It wouldn't cost but a few cents for the poster board. what do ya think?
jurs

8

Being tailed at the hall

by jurs in

jw
friends

i wanted to share an experience and see if any of had a similar expereince when you were a jw.

right before i started doubting, i had gone to "stars on ice" with an elders wife , we had dinner first and we ended up getting drunk.

smashed might be a better word choice.

jurs

Blondie,

I DA'd myself many months later, so I no longer go to the hall. Alot happened after that incident but related to that incedent that got me doubting.
I did talk to her afterwards and she did deny everything. Her elder husband covered for her.
I couldn't get over it. Today, I understand why she lied. She was scared to death of being DF'd.
jurs

8

Being tailed at the hall

by jurs in

jw
friends

i wanted to share an experience and see if any of had a similar expereince when you were a jw.

right before i started doubting, i had gone to "stars on ice" with an elders wife , we had dinner first and we ended up getting drunk.

smashed might be a better word choice.

jurs

I wanted to share an experience and see if any of had a similar expereince when you were a JW.
Right before I started doubting, I had gone to "Stars on ice" with an elders wife , we had dinner first and we ended up getting drunk. Smashed might be a better word choice. Anyhow I immediately the next day went to the elders to confess and also ratted on my friend. She shared damaging ,confidential stuff with me which I also told the elders.
I thought I was doing the right thing, anyhow I noticed from then on that the elders that met with me seemed to eavesdropping on my conversations.
It was very odd. One elder in particular Brad Oakman, don't know if any of you know him, would stand close by and listen in on my conversations. I was beginning to feel insulted and it really started to give me the creeps.
Do any of you Ex- Elders out there know if this is standard ? I'm sure it wasn't my imagination. Did they think I was a wolf that was going to hurt the flock ?
Jurs

20

What Kind of Witness Were You ?

by Big Jim in

jw
friends

for me that is a hard question to answer.

it seems like when your in the borg it is always pounded in your head that you need to do more so they made you think you were never doing enough.. the last five years that i was in it i guess you could say i was pretty gung-ho, i regulare pionered for almost three years as well as served as a ms, i used my home for book study as well as saturday field service.. but you know what all that does not amount to a hill of beans, you know why?

because the whole time i was a doubter, i never liked it from the time i was a kid.

jurs

I was the weak sister. I wasn't raised in the org. and my husband was not a JW. I came in when i was 27. I averaged 7 hours a week in field service and felt like I didn't fit in with the other sisters . The sisters that I did become friends with were a little on the worldly side. I struggled with keeping up on reading my mags and studying for meetings. I felt overwhelmed !!
The funny thing is as much as I struggled and was "weak" I was rock solid that it was the "Truth". I remember thinking how wonderful it was that I had found something that I totally and completely believed right down to my bones. I felt sorry for people who were "lost" and didn't have a firm foundation of faith like I did. At meetings when the issue of doubting came up, I would think, How could anyone doubt? The truth seemed so obviously the truth to me.
I guess I was a better witness than I gave myself credit for. I bought the whole line of bull.
Jurs

16

Hello-New Again and Pierced!

by Pierced Angel in

i've posted in the past under the nic, "doubting sister", but i'm no longer doubtful.

i'm totally convinced, the witnesses are just another religion like any other.

actually, i consider them a cult, but i think many religions have cultish tendencies anyhow, so i'll refrain from calling them that for now.. because of this site i've been able to see things more clearly and i'm feeling better about leaving.

jurs

Hi Pierced Angel,

I've read a few of your posts and wanted to introduce myself.
I just left the org in May so I haven't celebrated my kids B-days, X-mas or halloween yet, but I like you am very excited. I laughed when I read that you have your halloween costume idea picked out already. My kids and I have been surfing the web's costume sites !!!
Enjoy your freedom !
Jurs