Becareful Jon Preston!! Encourage your wife to make new non-JW friends, compliment her and your children to do things that the WTBTS discourges, encourage her and your children to use the internet and critically think for themselves, and tell/show her and your children how much you love them and will not judge them, BUT do not tell your wife your doubts until she tells you that she will not attend meetings anymore and that the WTBTS is a dangerous cult.
The WTBTS's BITE control is very powerful, so don't take it for granted.
I wish you and your family the best.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
Robert