Posts by 1Robinella

62

I don't believe my boyfriend is 100% committed to this religion. How to handle?

by herlovelyworld in

hi guys!

im very new here and i need a little help.. im not a witness, but i know all of the quirks and rules and whatnot because my long-distance boyfriend is a witness.

the issue, other than the obvious, is that i fell in love with him before he told me he was one of jehovahs witnesses.

1Robinella

Yes this young guy sounds deeply confused. Both of you are young and have a lot of life to live. Unfortunately, this religion tends to "keep people down" and "small minded" I have known a lot of stories like this (not me personally). Over the years, I've probably known around ten or so similar cases (give or take). Some were high school guys I've known that had a "worldly" girlfriend (I've always hated that term "worldly"). A couple of the guys got the girl pregnant and that's how they get there "secret" exposed, so to speak. This is a tricky thing too. Although your boyfriend probably really does care a lot for you and wants to marry you, I'm sure he really means that because witnesses young adults tend to take dating seriously which leads to marriage. But I am hoping that you have already met his family...? I assume you haven't. If it was me, I would show him this website because it will let him know that he is not alone and that a lot of people left the religion successfully. Of course, he has to realize that he will get a lot of pressure from his parents and the organization, but it does fade over time. This young guy does not sound strong. He's definately playing both sides. The best thing for him to do is to move out and rent what he can afford (even if it's renting a bedroom from someone - outside the cult).

To me, and this is what I did. I changed my phone number and moved. He doesn't have to go talk to the elders about what he did. I would walk away quietly as possible. (Although every so often my mother sends the elders to my home - I just don't talk to them, I look out the window. lol.) If he DOES speak to them about EVERYTHING...he's only causing more problems and a possible disfellowshiping. Which means, he's shuned and his own parents/family won't even talk to him. Over time, he will see he made the right decision and laugh about how "controlled" he was. It's kind of sad that he put you in this situation, if he's a man, he will own up to it and do a little self discovery. Whatever his decision will be, it would be his decision (not something that you pressured him to do). I can't believe that he "feels" that he owes people anything! Yes, it was nice that people in the organization supported the family when his brother passed away but he doesn't owe anything to them. That right there, tells me it's time for him to move on and get a quick construction job and move out. I really feel bad for him and you and hope that everything will work out well for both of you.

For me, I love celebrating the holidays. It's so much fun..especially halloween. I'm 38 years old and I get dressed up every year. lol. I never had any holidays growing up. Hang in there.

8

leaving 'apostate' stuff around on the PC for the kids to see???

by Aussie Oz in

jw
friends

my kids come to visit each second weekend.. if they look at my files they could easy find my massive file on jw's (and i hope they have).

i have recently thought of leaving as a screensaver during the visits something like an old wt cover (say, the 1914 one) or a big ''jwfacts.com" accross it.

or perhaps some wt quote to get them thinking...or asking questions.

1Robinella

I say good for you I'd leave the information on the kitchen counter with other stuff like some mail or the newspaper but make sure it's on top of everything. This way, if your cooking a meal and your kids help they will definately see it. If they ask you about it, be honest about it. If they stay the night, they may decide to check out what you left but probably won't advertise it (prolly once you went to bed). Your giving them "food for thought."lol

For me, I have stayed the night at my parents home before and my mother has left personal items out, but I couldn't look at it even though I was kinda tempted. lol

33

"There's really no good reason why we should turn our time in late"

by Crisis of Conscience in

another wonderful part this week at the meeting.

and this is what the brother said.. he related examples, based on the om book, as to how jehovah kept records.

funny part is, they all applied to population, the amount of people.. is there any part of the bible that talks about how jehovah kept a log of hours on some occasion?

1Robinella

I used to make up hours for the field service. lol. This was when I was figuring out what I was going to do. lol

28

so were do I go now that ive left the kingdom hall?

by arimatthewdavies in

many people for one reason or other have quit going to the kingdom hall me included!

i dont object to the people for they are clean well dressed human beings, i object to the way a prefabricated doctorine is distributed, useing hugh amounts of books magazines and media to attempt to study the bible,i feel obligated to say i agree with that method and under pressure to promote it, theirfore i stoped going because pretending to agree with this method and rendering lip service to it in order to keep from being disfellowshiped is a lie,and liers go to the lake of fire, .

so now that we have left the hall were do we go?

1Robinella

Are you seeking another religion so quickly after leaving the kingdom hall? If your asking I say take a nice two or three week vacation (if $$ permits) this is to just get your head clear. For me, I took up hobbies and did a lot of inner self evaluation to see how I feel and what direction feels good for me. I painted and started rollerblading. I got in mental and physical shape. I got a dog and taught her tricks. I started seeing how I was opening up and feeling more comfortable in my own skin instead of feeling like "I better study for the meeting tonight." For me, all the meetings, studying, biblestudies, commenting, demonstrations...etc got to be too much. Especially when my field service hours fell short for a month and was in trouble by the elders. (I used to do 60 hours a month). Yikes. They were upset I did only 40. Yikes. I remember that like it was yesterday.

Don't make rash decisions and jump into anything. Take it slow and just enjoy the sunset.

105

I'm a Neutral Jehovah's Witness

by Martini in

jw
friends

dear brothers and sisters,.

i martini, will confide in you that i have become a neutral jehovah's witness.

i wonder if i'm not coining a new phrase here!.

1Robinella

To me, being neutral as a JW means your kind of already stepping aside. Nothing wrong with that my friend. I believe religion is a personal decision and not a decision our family/friends can make you/us feel guilty for. This took me a long time to figure out because of all the guilt that was passed my way. If this religion is working great for you then more power to you. But it sounds as if your "not feeling" it, then walk away. Again, religion is a personal choice.

For me I was born and raised by a strict JW mother and a father that was baptized but my father and I kept an open mind to the concept...god is great and god is love, if family and friends treat you differently because you have personal differences or different beliefs then "something is wrong with them." For me, once I realized this religion was not for me. My "so-called" JW friends pretended I did not exist and I was doomed "bad association." Even my mother treated me "worldly" and called me a "disappointment." With their negative attitude change towards me it just encouraged me that this is definately NOT the religion for me. You call that love? Admittaly, at times it made me sad because I wasn't the one that changed, I just opened my eyes to the real world. I can honestly say "I am happier now than ever." I hope you found these words of encouragment and more power to you and whatever god you choose in your life.

Peace

6

How the heck do I change my pic that this site gave me and update my location? Thanks :)

by 1Robinella in

hello everyone :) i am brand new at this site and very excited to meet everyone :) although i would like to change the picture and my personal info (that everyone sees) but i cannot figure it out.

any suggestions?

thank you so much..

1Robinella

Thanks everyone totally appreciate it. I just visited Gravatar and hopefully both sites can connect. If not, I suppose I'll find a computer guy/gal to ask. Lol-Robinella

6

How the heck do I change my pic that this site gave me and update my location? Thanks :)

by 1Robinella in

hello everyone :) i am brand new at this site and very excited to meet everyone :) although i would like to change the picture and my personal info (that everyone sees) but i cannot figure it out.

any suggestions?

thank you so much..

1Robinella

Hello everyone :) I am brand new at this site and very excited to meet everyone :) Although I would like to change the picture and my personal info (that everyone sees) but I cannot figure it out. Any suggestions? Thank you so much.

200

Demons and the WTS

by brotherdan in

i remember growing up and hearing all sorts of stories about demonic activity from people.

some would be experiences that people had going door to door and visiting a "witch" or "warlock".

some would inadvertently go to a fortune tellers door and have a demonic experience.. i was always facinated by all the stories.

1Robinella

Growing up as a JW this was a difficult subject for me because my parents home was to me, haunted. The household was pretty normal meaning BBQ's and family road trips, pretty happy with a little disfunction like everyone else. But when I was alone or asleep I would hear voices on the other side of the house. One time I cried to my mother and she had a "brother" in the congregation that had previously delt with these types of things, he came over and didn't "sense" anything. My mother was in total denial and still is.

I learned early on that I could not talk to her, my family or anyone in the congregation about this. No one helped me. After many, many, many years growing up and my sheets would get tight, noises in the kitchen, voices, someone sat on my bed once, my name called out once...seriously, no joke. I turned 18 years old and got married to a brother. I couldn't wait to leave.

Once I left, I never had another experience like I experienced at my parents home. It wasn't until I was in my 20's my much older sister (12 year age difference) we were hanging out at her house and somehow this discussion came up. She told me similar things that I experienced. I almost fell off the chair. I was so happy that someone else in my family also experienced these things and that I wasn't crazy or the only one. I believe the fear that my mother and the meetings about "demons" scarred me as a kid. They made me feel like it's all my imagination, but the funny thing is that since I never told my older sister and she brought it up. It validated it for me. When I visit my parents home, I still get nervous and refuse to be alone in that house. It definately doesn't help a kid when parents get into this total denial thing.

Infact, a few years ago I was with my sister, her daughter (my neice) and a couple of friends at my parents home and my mom left the house and we were preparing for a wedding (non-witness wedding) and were walking down the hallway to put the wedding dress, shoes etc in the extra bedroom. When we walked away, we all heard someone snoring from the room we just left. We all stopped, heard it and talked about it when we got to the living room. We told our mom, she said "My girls have active imaginations."

After all of this, yes, I do believe in spirits. I do not believe "everything" is evil like we were taught. Most important thing is to believe in god, be positive and a friend.

58

how many in your cong had nervous breakdowns?

by highdose in

jw
friends

of the congregation i spent my life in i would say a good 75% had nervous breakdowns at some point.

and often there was never really a obivous reason for it.

well not that we jw's could understand at the time.. even the queen bee's/ elderettes were not immune to this.. what about you?.

1Robinella

I've noticed that it's usually from people that try to be "perfect." Always going to meetings, service, commenting, doing demostrations, assembly parts, etc. After a while they can't take all that pressure. That's just my opinion but I'm sure there are many, including me.

49

I've noticed a peculiar human trait lately....

by Terry in

at the bookstore where i work free coffee has been provided for at least 6 years now.. the customers (and non-customers who just come in and mooch) go through a dozen or so pots a day!.

our store manager decided we could ill afford to provide both caffeine free and regular coffee because of 2 reasons.. 1.we are always running out of regular and not that many people drink caffeine free.. 2.when we do run out of regular the customers get really pissed off and hunt employees down to complain!.

i began noticing how easily a gift or a courtesy extended to a person suddenly becomes viewed as a right!.

1Robinella

Unfortunately, people can be very rude and abnoxious. I'd start charging them.