Posts by 1Robinella

20

My son said his first swear word!

by brotherdan in

jw
friends

...and it couldn't have been funnier.

i got home from work last night and he ran up to hug me as usual.

he started walking away and said, "i'm thristy.

1Robinella

Hilarious. Even more funny if he decided to raise his hand at the meeting and do it. Just hilarious.

20

My Story: Short Version

by In in

i... well, i need to face this fear that someone will read my story and know who i am and harrass me.

there are enough distinctive things about my story that who i am is pretty easy to identify, if you know me.. so, here goes.. i was raised as a witness.

my dad was abusive.

Your story although unique is quite similar to many. Continue your education, be happy and make lots of friends. You have just gained many more on this board. We all have see it all, been through it and stronger for it as well. For me, I am so happy to find this site. It's been a blast reading everyone's comments and learning about other people's struggles and accomplishments, although unfortunate it's quit similar to mine. Enjoy reading.

1Robinella

21

I was wrongfully Disfellow shipped out...help

by pes0210 in

jw
friends

in 04 i was brought before a comitee of 3 elders and admited to sex before marriage, given my situation at the time i fell short, i showed repentance for it and they said they were going to recomend i leave for awhile to find myself spiritually...(wow the only time they got one right) i did find myself spiritually through other means.

now i have a question since i no longer want to be a part of this organization and i was cast out from it, shouldnt my records with my personal information be destroyed?

if its in a file that i do not want to exist?

1Robinella

I do know that they do clean out the files and keep current stuff (my father-in-law was an elder I asked him once). As far as I know, they do not keep such records (It's not like a courthouse and it's dictated word for word) but it seems that every KH keeps own records. But probably the only thing they have on you is the date you were DF'd and why. But no details and your address/phone number unless you've moved since then, then I wouldn't worry too much. Remember that (at least at my old hall) that the elders would move away or start attending a different congregation. Probably the only information the would have of you is if you still have family in "the truth" that keep giving them your current information so they can do a drop by. My mom does that to me every so often. I hate that. If that happens open the door with a cig and cocktail and welcome them in. lol

28

Are you a meat-and-potatoes kind of guy/gal?

by compound complex in

.

or is tofu your bag?.

coco ambivalent.

1Robinella

I love a good steak. I tried having vegan or vegetarian friends but they were too rude at dinner time always complaining about my steak, giving weird faces and pretending that they were going to throw up. Besides they always looked unhealthy and their clothes seemed to hang on them. lol. Sorry to all the vegans. Maybe those people I knew were a little extreme. I assume not everyone is like that. (I hope). lol I like my steak cooked well done, no blood. with lots of carbs. Yum I'm gettin' hungry now. I also love salads and anything grown and a nice ice cold beer to go with it.

31

If you have kids who are being exposed to JW beliefs

by Libelle in

it's becoming clearer and clearer that i need to muster some sort of strategy for countering the mr's indoctrination of the kids.

now some of these kids are stepkids, so that makes it a bit hairier.

but for our youngest, i will need to think about how to teach her other things too.

1Robinella

I agree with Ding..To me the best education for a child is exposing them to all different types of religion. For me, I have JW bibles (my grandmothers), Catholic bibles etc. You understand? I figure that religion is a personal choice and when I have a child I'd want my child to make own decision when they grow up. If they don't believe in a god, fine. If they are wanting to join the Jewish religion, fine. I cannot in my mind, make my child convert to whatever thinking I may have. To me, the responsibility of a parent is to show them many options. A well informed person can make wise decisions. I want my child to accept other people's beliefs and to never force religion on other people unlike the JW religion that was forced down my throat.

In this case I think your doing right. "How to keep them always thinking rather than never questioning?"

Good for you.

Stay very involved. When the time comes and they ask questions, listen, think before answering and then reply. Keep the communication open and light hearted. I'd talk to the Mr. or at least drop hints that: "Children need to grow up well rounded and informed to make sound decisions later in life...or...Lets find out what the children feel inside of them, what their heart says rather than forcing them to convert to JW thinking." Little comments may slowly melt into the Mr. head and he can start having a mind of his own?? I donno. Just a thought. As far as step children, that can be tricky. Are both biological parents JW? The whole step parent thing is tough. I know cause I have a 16 year old step child. AHHHH! If the children have neighbor friends or school friends that they play with after school, if they are invited for sleep overs, let them go. This to me, is the best way children can see how other people live. It exposes them to other cultures. For example my step child has a friend that is Jewish and before dinner they do their Jewish thing. (I can't remember what they do) lol. But anyway, it's a good thing. In my case, my mother never ever let me stay the night at a non-believers home and the odds of me becoming a JW was evident early on.

Hope this helps. lol

27

My mom is pleading me to attend the JC

by bottleofwater in

what should i do?.

1Robinella

It's very simple really. Just stand up for yourself and don't go. I know it sounds easy enough and dealing with parents that still throw the guilt thing around is tough enough but the sooner you stand firm with your beliefs and by setting boundries sooner than later, your mom will somewhat back off (I hope). Good luck.

20

What's the best romantic gift youv'e ever received?

by potleg in

jw
friends

sharing a special anniversary with a very special lady and i'm looking for a little "inspiration" .

so what's the best romantic gift you ever received (or wishewed you had)?.

1Robinella

My man is very sweet but he stresses out on gifts for me. If it's our anniversary, bday, xmas etc he starts sweating weeks in advance. Lol. It's kind of sweet because he really tries. But I have to say, for me, the most romantic thing my hubby does for me every saturday and sunday is make coffee and brings it to me (with the creamer and sugar already mixed in). I swear he never has to buy me another thing because I appreciate it so much and I always make a big deal about it too, it makes him excited. But I mean it. Since I work nights a hot cup of coffee in the morning is the best. Seriously, we had once scheduled a mini get-away (I live close to Yountville, CA) and made arrangements to have a couples massage and soak in the private hot tub in a private room. Of course we were butt naked. It was fun. It was expensive but worth it. Once we were done relaxing, we went to a fancy white table cloth restaurant for a late lunch. It was perfect and very romantic.

If your on a budget, how about a picnic? If you have dogs bring them and make sure you stop by on the way to get some flowers for her at the farmers market. Have a nice bottle of wine. I love Forestville Merlot. It's cheap but good to me. Once you return home draw her a bath (if you have room for two) join her. Give her a foot massage, if she likes that...maybe you'll get lucky

Just remember no matter what you do mean it from your heart. Write her a love note all the reasons you love her. Put it on nice colored paper and use a nice black pen. (Don't use 3 ring binder paper and pencil). lol.

Have fun. Hope this helps.

388

I HATE this religion

by brotherdan in

so today was my first sunday meeting that i didn't go with my wife.

as an update she has decided not to move out right now...because she doesn't have anywhere to go.

but she is giving me the silent treatment.

1Robinella

I'm sorry brotherdan. Regarding your children. I'd tell them the truth. Something like.."I believe in god, I love your mommy and I love you. When you get a little older we can talk more about it." For a five year old that's probably enough for him he'd probably walk away fine. I'd always keep the communication easy and clear with them. As far as your wife, humm...what's up with her going out with "worldly" people for drinks? (I've always hated the term: Worldly). JW's frown on that big time. Besides doesn't Jehovah want her to work it out with you and keep the marriage vow? Your wife drinking with other people could possibly open the door for affairs. I'm not trying to make it worse, but a woman=cocktails=need to talk to someone that "Understands." Plenty of men out their willing to listen, even brothers in the hall. Becareful brotherdan. Although I'm sure she's a good woman, right now she's really confused because the life you and her created and lived this far, she was comfortable and happy (I'm assuming).

What about having your parents or other family member (non JW family member). watch the kids for the weekend and your wife and you go out in the town, have a couple of cocktails, stay the night in a new city. Kind of get-away for the weekend or for 3/4 days? You wouldn't have to worry about the kids maybe she'd open up about her thoughts and you both can possibly get closer..just a thought.

I kind of went through the same thing many years ago but I never had kids. My husband was a MS and he was worried what to tell people why I wasn't at the meetings. He said "She's sick." In a way I was sick of the meetings. lol. I'm not trying to make light of your situation. I just hope that she comes around. Are you able to give more detail? Is she a pioneer? etc..

23

Is this weird or what?

by 1Robinella in

jw
friends

the other day i was on the phone with my mother.

she lives about 20 minutes from the rest of the family.

she'll be 73 in november.

1Robinella

All your wonderful comments are appreciated. Thank you, your comments were a huge help. Everyone had such good comments that everything that was sent had valid points to ponder over. I believe this is just another jab because I (we) are not JW's anymore. I also believe she's scared and worried what may happen in the future for her. She just doesn't realize that she wouldn't have to worry so much because the answer is right under her nose (so-to-speak) but I think something hard will have to "hit her" like, her friends not helping out. That would create a huge slap in the face for her, unfortunately we have to be their to see it. All I can do is live my life and when the time comes deal with it then. But this is a waking moment to reality when dealing with loved ones wrapped up in this religion.

"Ya right..Jehovah`s Witness`s are known throughout the community..For their Charity and Soup kitchens for the Needy..You mom has an Unpleasant Surprise in her Future.."

I agree with you Outlaw.

"They would support her insofar as being nice to her at the meeting."

So true.

"Actions speak louder than words."

Agreed.

"I have heard Elders tell family that their faithful Elderly ones WERE their responsibility not the congregations."

I have heard this many times as well.

"...but family love should flow both ways.."

Well, it should shouldn't it.

-peace and martini's for everyone

23

Is this weird or what?

by 1Robinella in

jw
friends

the other day i was on the phone with my mother.

she lives about 20 minutes from the rest of the family.

she'll be 73 in november.

1Robinella

Yup. That's what I thought too everyone. I knew my mom was "off balance" but geez, this sounded way out there. My sister said that "It is sad to think that our own mother would turn away our help when so many older people would just like to have someone visit them let alone have a safe place to live with family." I think that if she did live with us, she'd demand us not to have a christmas tree. lol. or stay in her part of the house during thanksgiving. lol. With my mom, I could totally see her doing that. But If I told my mom that I was going to the meetings and getting back into it, she'd definately start packing her bags and wait for us to pick her up. lol. So sad really. Thanks everyone for your comments.