Thank you for sharing. I've never been a jw, but have been through a painful divorce and "shunned" by family members, so I feel your pain.
I'm sure it was because of those things that I "studied" with jw's; guess I would have done anything for a bit of encouragement and affection then!
What pulled me through was the need to be a strong single parent for my two.
Whatever the rest of your story, and whatever the future brings, I devoutly hope that you and your kids make it through to a happy and free adulthood.
Warmest wishes, Retro