If you should go back, become an elder again, you are going to have a terrible time giving talks on the subjects the WTS dictates to you. You will know in your heart this is not true and it will affect you in a negative way, and by extension, your family. Some would have you tell them (elders) you are suffering from depression, rather you are or not. If you are not suffering from depression, this course (lie) will have the same negative effect.
This is going to be a very tough choice, however you choose to go. Best wishes.