That question is part of the JW brainwash. The JWs teach their members to self-destruct if they dare to leave. The cult sets us up to fail upon leaving.
I got into therapy before I left the JWs. So, when I finally got myself disfellowshipped, I had another foundation under me.
When the jws kicked out my legs from under me, I could stand on my own. I wasn't co-dependent with that religion any more.
I had a mind of my own and I could move on and walk away.
I had a therapist who knew about cult mentality. I had my dance world filled with caring friends who were there to support me through the shock of losing my children via shunning.
Another thing that helped me was the realization that in order to really heal from the jw brainwash, I had to purge all the old beliefs and replace those antiquated ways of thinking with something healthy.
I am a true Apostate because I don't believe what the JWs preach any more. They don't have the truth, in other words. I absolutely know that now.
I have my own belief system which feels healthy to me and serves me well.
satinka