Posts by Lari

28

HELP PLEASE!

by TheStar in

jw
friends

i'm a newbie around here.

i have only posted once but i've come in here almost every day to read for about the past month.

this place has been therapeutic for me as i'm currently trying to make my exit out of the borg.

Lari

(((Star)))
Freeze! Put down that pen and walk away slowly...

If I had known now what I knew when I was DFed in May 2000 I would have taken an entirely different road.

I was feeling pretty fed up with the org when my sister gave me the option of turning myself in or turning me in. By that time I just didn’t give a damn for the org. In the end I called up the elders and refused to meet with or even discuss the situation with them. I said, "I am living with my boyfriend", (I wasn't at the time but we were intimate.), "Do what you have to do." I repeated this phone call twice to give them the means to DF me.

Big Mistake! I should have been more evasive. Eventually I did move in with my boyfriend but by that time I could have been pretty far off the JW radar and my sister wouldn't have felt compelled to rat me out. In your case you aren’t committing a carnal sin; you just stopped believing. So, unless you feel the need to expose the Borg, you can try to fade away.

Amazing shot himself in the foot, as he himself admits in his posts, because he felt compelled to explain his feelings or expose the hypocrisy. If you can manage it, keep your new beliefs between you and your husband. The rest of the world only needs to know that you don’t feel up to it. The depression cover is a great one. Then, when much more time has passed you can be more open but by then it wont seem like such a scandal.

Best of luck.

67

Spirits/Entities - A question for all.

by Nemesis in

i would like to ask a question if i might: how do ones here view spirits?

(not the alcoholic kind) i have left the org.

now for at least 5 years, although i did go to the memorial last year, but not where i used to go to the hall; i was not df or da.. .

Lari

Nemesis -
I am not sure I believe in spiritual entities. However, I am sure enough to be scared of the bad ones. Makes no sense, I know. When I was a little girl (11 or 12) I suffered from nightmares for a couple of weeks. Horrible, terrifying dreams where I would wake up crying out for Jehovah. There was no catalyst that I can think of. No family stress or scary movie. It just happened. That experience was enough for me to have a healthy respect for the possibility of spirits. I don't set out to have them help me nor do I mock their existence.

When reading your description a couple things come to mind. Maybe you could keep a simple log of when you have these experiences. It could help you pinpoint events that are A) making you more sensitive to their presence or B) identify stressors that are triggering a psychotic response. Either way, real or imagined, it seems like it would be a good idea to have some control over them.

You say that right now they aren’t derailing your life. But if they ever do start to take over, the more information you have about what’s going on, the better equipped you will be to deal with it.

Just a thought.

32

Hypocrites.....grrrrrrr

by Tatiana in

jw
friends

well, a couple of nights ago i was kind of ashamed of myself.

let me explain.. i have a new job.

as a model scout.

Lari

April, again, Bravo.

Ok, maybe it was little control deficit but hey, like Lady Lee pointed out, too much control and we are like them.

I know you still feel upset right now but - Thanks for the story. I found reading it empowering. Too many times I put up with JW crap because, in my mind I still think of myself as the one doing wrong. So I must do penance or something.

Next time maybe I'll have a little more guts, thanks to you.

Love is a dish best served - hell, anytime!

5

Great tip on impressing the ladies! true story

by hungry4life in

jw
friends

i have to share this great valentines day experience with you.

i was in class today and this young, good looking guy came in with about 4 dozen, beautiful long stemmed roses.

he gave one to every female in class(old, young, thin, fat,gay, straight) who didn't have a valentine!

Lari

H4L,
What a great story. Thanks. Yesterday was my first Vday and hubby & I had a great time.

I wonder though, men being what they are, how big a loser would a girl doing the same thing be perceived as?

Women being what we are, wouldnt you be afraid of attracting all the losers in the place?

17

Ya'll dont believe in the Watchtower?

by DanielHaase in

jw
friends

down here in da dirty sowth we all abot some awak!

and wactower.

i knows this jesus's word direcing us in our every step.

Lari

For a smart guy like you I bet thinking up all those Deep South spellings gave you a headache!

I love the joke even more when I think about all the effort that went into it.

17

Ya'll dont believe in the Watchtower?

by DanielHaase in

jw
friends

down here in da dirty sowth we all abot some awak!

and wactower.

i knows this jesus's word direcing us in our every step.

Lari

Dan - I laughed, I cried... That joke meant everything to me.

13

My horrible encounter with the JC machine

by jesussaves in

i'm new here, allow me to introduce myself.

i am a 27 year old married mother of three.

i was also a third generation jw.

Lari

Welcome JS.
Did they really ask you if you reached the big O? What does that have to do with the price of silk in Burma?

Maybe they figure bad sex is enough punishment in and of itself and go easier on you.

30

There is no escape, no way out...

by butalbee in

jw
friends

i've been invited to go to a study group again, by a sister who i work with, she said she would like to explain some doctrines to me that i might had misunderstood, and would like to get together and talk.

she also gave me 5 magazines--told me, of the great articles, that i should read.

yep!!

Lari

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying you need to drop to your knees and kiss their hands. Just a little respect for their opinions. They very likely do not want to Destroy your life - though that may be what you think would happen if they got their way.

From personal experience I know that I have gotten farther with a cool, determined attitude. "I know what you know and I have made my choice. Please don't bring it up again." Then when they do bring it up I interrupt them mid-sentence with a loud, firm NO! That seems to work.

Elder Wart Nose: We just want to see you..
Butalbee: NO. This conversation is over.
Elder Wart Nose: How can you...
Butalbee: NO ( a little louder)
Then walk away.

Anyway, though it's fun and theraputic to think of ways to freak out faithful Dubs. But if you actually act, then you never become free of their grip.

1

Validity of my baptism.

by Lari in

jw
friends

just like a lot of you here i got baptized young.

11 years old.

i knew that at the time.

Lari

Just like a lot of you here I got baptized young. 11 years old. I did it because everyone else was doing it. I knew that at the time.

Some years later, age 15 or so, I asked my mom if it was possible to be RE-baptized. You know, now I was feeling all this zeal and wanted to make a heartfelt commitment to Jah. She told me that it was possible, that if I did not consider my initial baptism valid then I should talk to the elders and see about doing it again.

I have no WT library and really do not want to bring up JW subjects with my JW family. Do any of you know if that is really possible?

Because I wonder, if that baptism is declared void, then how can I be disfellowshipped? I say this because my brother, who was never baptized, enjoys full family association despite his sinful habits. I am DF but lead a sterile monogamous life and am the family leper.

Just Curious

8

Self defeating feelings

by joelbear in

jw
friends

remember that calculus test i thought i failed and which panicked me into suicidal thoughts.

i made an 89 on it.. will i ever conquer my self defeating anxiety?

time will tell.. i can't erase the past, all i can work on is the future.. one thing i have found out is how many people are going through tough times.

Lari

Congratulations! Sometimes I think I wrote the book on self-defeat. Heck, I haven't gotten up the courage to even go to college yet.

I think it's awsome that you are working toward somthing great for yourself.

How long have you been back in school, what is your goal, what is your ultimate dream job?