The elders usually leave people alone unless they are high profile in some way.
I'm afraid you have a higher profile than most, being that your dad is an elder, you post frequently here and have shared many details of yourself, and you have your picture posted. (I'm assuming that's your real pic.) Even loyal JWs occasionally dally in internet surfing to look at ex-JW sites. If you truly want to avoid being disfellowshipped, it's good to keep a low profile and not have an identity that would be easily recongizable by someone in your former congregation. That's not being a coward. It's just practical if you really wish to avoid being DF'd. That is unless you're willing and ready and able to lose your relationship with every JW family member you have. Of course, not all JWs react the same to a family member who has left. The question is, is this the right action for you to take? What the benefits? What are the liabilities? Only you can answer that.
I disassociated under pressure, and wish now I had not done so. I would be in a better position to covertly help my relatives still in.
Now, because of my official status as DA'd, that opportunity is extremely difficult because we rarely see each other. If I hadn't been so emotionally tangled at the time of my elder meeting, I would have seen clearly what my strategy should have been.
On a personal level it felt good to burn that Watchtower bridge and put it behind me and I found that empowering. But in retrospect it put me in a weaker position to reach family members still in. I still love and miss my JW family members, and my friends who are still in. I was very fortunate to be able to talk to my two sisters before I was labeled, and today they are out and free. My advice, Think long term.
As to the issue of whether the meeting is for you or not, relax. If it is, you'll know soon enough. If it is for you, consult this group on how to handle the elders and what to say to avoid being DF'd. (if that is your wish.) But if you have to know if the meeting is about you, why not ask your dad? He is your dad.
Your anguish over whether the meeting is for you indicates to me that you wish to avoid being labeled by the Society. I recommend that you do so. Lie, say what you have to, but avoid being labeled. It is not a DF'g offense to have doubts, to say you are troubled by doubts.
But stick to that attitude when you deal with JW elders who care nothing about what is true or not, but only upholding Watchtower dogma and rules. You are on the road to being DF'd when you assert yourself as certain the Watchtower is wrong on issues to the elders. What is the point of that? Do you believe the elders will listen to anything you have to say and carefully consider it? Some people feel for the sake of their mental, emotional and spiritual health that it is good to become assertive with JWs and the elders and say where they stand. I'm sure they are right... for themselves. But if you love your family, and they are JWs, and you really want to help them out of the organizaiton, you would be better served to avoid being labeled. I call this "Theocratic Anti-Cult Strategy." By being able to maintain relationships with friends and relatives, opportunities will present themselves for you to "witness" to them about your doubts. You may in turn plant a vital seed that will later help your loved ones leave the WT as you have done.
On the other hand, some feel friends and family aren't worth having if they will go along with Watchtower shunning enforcement and shun you. They feel if those people can't accept me, then I don't want them in my life. That can be healthy and good also.
If you take your time, consider everything, and make a decision based on all the long-term results you will get from your decision, I am postive you'll make the best decision for you.
