PLEASE take some time to think seriously about what this religion is doing to your mental stability! I have had family go thru the same experience as you, and she too had thoughts of suicide. She still suffers to this day with emotional/mental problems from her young adulthood.
Whatever your 'sin' with this boy was, do you REALLY think god, a loving god, would want 'his people' to cause you SO much pain? Do you REALLY think that the terrible things you have been put through 'helped' your spirituality? Or did it do the opposite? How would Jesus have treated you had he been there? Would he shun you for a year 'until you learned your lesson'? Or would he have said 'Your sins are forgiven'.
You have had a taste of what JW friendship is all about. Trust me it doesn't get better. Not only that, but now that you have been DF'ed you will maybe never be treated the same again, but always be viewed as 'weak'. You have tasted the injustice of elders familiy being treated differently - trust me that is NOT an isolated case, but is in fact the rule in almost all congs. Many, many of us here have been abused in the same manner. Would god approve of such hypocrocy? No.
Please think carefully about things. You say you have developed true friends while out. Will they shun you now just because you're reinstated? I doubt it. Will they shun you if you make a mistake in your life? I doubt it. Will your new again JW 'freinds' do so? You bet. As soon as the elders say 'she's bad'. Once again you will not exist to them.
Life outside the JW org is not as bad as you have been raised to beleive. Yes, there is a strong emotional turmoil that most of us have undergone as we begin to realize that our entire childhood we have been lied to, duped, mislead. But you can work thru that and develope YOUR OWN veiwpoints on life, the world around you, religion, and more. No need to consult the local elders to determine if your dress is too short, or if you can take Alceton Positronic Liver pills or whatever. And the freinds you begin to make will be made because YOU choose them, not because they are 'good witnesses' who got their 10 hours in last month.
Good luck, please stay with us. Many of us have gone thru EXACTLY what you are going thru now.