Well, it had nothing to do with abuse, but my mother, still a witness in good standing, has admitted that she sees much imperfection in the organization. Of course, she justifies it to herself as being run by "imperfect men"...but she still sees it enough to not hassle me about my fade. In fact, she understands and even sees my reasoning of why I don't attend. She doesn't condone it, but she understands and can make an exception in her mind because she knows how shabbily I have been treated by elders and many other witnesses.
CoonDawg
JoinedPosts by CoonDawg
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25
My Older Witness Mom Admits to me - "It's a Man's Organization "
by flipper ini was having a normal conversation with my witness mom 81 years old ( a witness for 57 years ) and the subject came up about my 56 year old sister who recently suffered a stroke in february .
my sister suffered for years with post-traumatic stress syndrome from an extremely abusive jw husband throughout the 1980's.
she was beaten, raped forcibly by him, and emotionally abused by his drug induced screaming rants, and to top that off; cheated on her constantly- even with sisters in the congregation.
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39
What Kind of Phone Do You Use?
by minimus inmy cell is a razor from motorola.
verizon has some new phones available.
if you were to upgrade, what would you get?
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CoonDawg
I currently have a cheap POS LG flip phone. It does have blue tooth, but nothing else. When my contract is up in a couple of months, I'm going to try and get the wife and I smart phones...I like the Palm Treo. I was thinking about a blackberry, but my step daughter works for Assurion - they do the warranty stuff for most of the big providers. She says they see alot of blackberry phones with service issues that are sent back for repair. They don't get near as many of the Palm phones or the Motorola smart phones back. My wife currently has a Razor, but since she's on the road alot (she's flying to NC tomorrow) she wants to have email access and stuff. She thinks her boss will pay for her data plan, so it might work out.
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38
Any Have Witness Spouses who Freaked Out When You Missed Meetings ?
by flipper ini mean , really freaked out !
you just have to tell your boss you can't go to the job out of town !
so , i did go on the out of town job, went to the memorial, however that was not enough.
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CoonDawg
Okay...just to be clear, I coined the name "psychobitchfromhell" (tm) for my ex. She generally used the "other" methods for trying to "keep me in line". Yes, I too was of the drinking on the way home every night...leaving the empty 24oz. cans lying in the bed of my pickup - just DARING her to say a f*cking thing about them... I got to where I'd leave earlier in the morning and stay later in the evenings at work (even before the hour drive each way) just so I would have to deal with her less and less. As to being denied sex, well, I married her when I was 20, and had the drives that were age appropirate for a repressed young dub man. According to her, because I wanted it more than once a week, I was "obsessed" and a "sex fiend". It got so bad, that I knew the exact month, week, day and hour of my daughter's conception because it was literally months between times I got laid. Jeez, it was bad. I remember laying in bed next to her, rubbing one out, thinking "I thought I got married so I didn't have to do this anymore." I always took her shit and never said a word. Then one time, I got upset at her and kicked a laundry basket across the house. I told her "hell yes, i'm upset. you're going to see (insert naughty married elder's name who'd formed an inappropriate relationship w/ my wife) and you say you want me to be the head of our house. So, here's me saying I forbid you to go if you want to maintain our marriage." I also added..."You think this is me angry. You have no idea what me angry looks like. I've always kept my temper in check because I love you, so just don't keep pushing me." Of course, she went and saw him. That was the beginning of the end. I mostly stopped meetings after that. Elders kept urging me to keep going, but all of them knew why I wouldn't go. The rest is history. She's still a psycho, only now she has a different playtoy. I wonder how marriage # 3 will last?
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31
No Girls Scout Cookies for you!
by independent_tre ineven though, i was raised in a witness home, i never remember hearing that girl scout cookies were a no-no.
and even though i've only been baptized for a few years, i don't remember any specific admonishment of these sweet treats.
but recently at work a jdub coworker made it a point to remind me that jw's do not buy or eat girl scout cookies.
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CoonDawg
I remember the reasoning in the congregations I was in being that the boy scouts, and by association, the girl scouts were akin to the paramillitary organizations like the Hitler Youth and were merely the minor leagues for millitary recruitment. After all, they wore uniforms and emphasized things like citizenship and comminity action. Therefore, no cookies. After I remarried, my neice was a girlscout and I've been buying cookies ever since. Some years, 20 boxes or so.
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49
Well, I'm nauseated now. Gag inducing dramatizations at my DC
by Lady Zombie induring the hour long symposium: empowered by holy spirit.
under the part "to fight temptation," a little dramatization of a young married man doing some work on his laptop.
he is tapping away when he suddenly slams his laptop shut.
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CoonDawg
Oh, NO! I'll have to tell my wife that she MISSED the DC on FRIDAY because of WORK! Blasphemy! I tell you! Oh, yeah, I'm chillin' next to the pool while she's there. Hope she am Mom get lots of religion while I sit here smoking one of the cigars that she bought for her favorite Heathen...ME!
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48
Please, I need helpful suggestions.....
by New light for you ini've been reading this board for a while, but never posted, but now everything has changed and i have nowhere to go for suggestions- .
my witness husband (robert7) in december, the night before the assembly, told me that he isn't a witness anymore, doesn't want to be involved anymore, doesn't believe it.
of course, i'm a good witness, take the kids out in service a few days a week every week... very active in the cong.my first reaction was that "i cant love him if he doesn't love jehovah" and it really looked like we surely would get a divorce in jan/feb.
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CoonDawg
Okay, in all seriousness, tell them you were drunk or under the influence of a narcotic for back pain. Lie your ass off. Let the elders know they are over reacting and you were simply amplifying your questions through a subtance that influenced you. Hey, the worst they would do is privately reprove you and let you have some time to fade. Big deal, you aren't wanting to go back anyway so it's not like "no commenting" restrictions are gonna bother you.
I feel for you about how emotionally wrenching all of this is for you. I wish you had the luxury of an "easy" fade. If JW's can justify untruth as "theocratic warfare" who gives a rip if you lie your ass off to them?
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14
Went to The Assembly... Finally Dealt with Family...
by cognac ingood lord... anyways, i took your advice and played it cool.
my brother told me my parents feel really bad about hurting me.
my mother made me lunch.
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CoonDawg
Congnac, If it were me, I'd have a few things to say to your sister about how she treats you in such a "christian" way. I'd bring up things from your shared history about the way she treats, not just you, but others you have in common. Let her know in so many words that there are a-holes in the world. Just as drinking booze doesn't make you an instant a-hole because it's usually already in you, being a witness doesn't absolve you of being one either. Let her know. Avoid even bringing religion in to it. Maybe because everyone around her is a JW and thinks that they have to put up with her crap, no one has ever really told her. I guarantee you that you can do it in a way, especially in front of others, that will get the point across and let her know to step off.
I had to do this to my conniving grandmother. She treats me and my siblings like crap because of simply being the offspring of my father, who she has a great deal of resentment towards. Finally, I told her how proud I was that she and her daughters were treating us with such "christian compassion" to save us from the evil influence of our father. She knew it was all sarcasm, but she'd never had anyone stand up to her. It needed to be said. At least it stopped the manipulation attempts on that front.
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36
Cigars
by besty in...and so to the end of a great evening with new friends and a familiar lover.. my feet are up and the sounds of socal stillness punctuated by occasional dreams departing from lax.. is there more to life than friends, lovers, brandy and hand rolled cuban companions?.
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CoonDawg
Yep, I love sitting out by the pool after the house is quiet in the Florida night air. The salt air coming in off of the Gulf...a glass of scotch and a nice cigar. Life is good. (although, most of the cuban cigars are just average. When Castro came in, most of the really good cigar makers and growers left. Now a good Nicaraguan is something to look forward to. I just enjoyed a nice Rocky Patel Honduran Reserve....a wonderful smoke.)
Even my wife loves the smell of my cigars. In fact, she brought back a box of cigars from New Orleans. There was a shop she found where they ...according to her...."roll them on the virgin thigh of a young latin lady".
What a gal.
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84
Are we DESTROYING society through a false sense of SELF-ESTEEM
by Terry ini think political correctness started the trend of dumbing down.
lowering the bar.
warping the standards.. in every society there are citizens with varying abilities and disabilities.. the natural sorting process is achievement, self-sustaining ability and productivity.. winners vs slackers.
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CoonDawg
Well, on the one hand, I agree with Terry. As Doug Stanhope put it..."Self esteem is over rated. If everyone has great self esteem, where are we gonna go to get lap dances? How is a guy like me gonna get laid?"
Sure, it's an exaggeration, but it does voice a truth.
On the other hand, having low self esteem or being beaten down by others in an organized social setting is unhealthy too. Hell, it led to me getting married to my first wife. I had low self esteem and figured since she was fairly "hot" that it was the best I was ever going to have the chance at. As I mentioned elsewhere, I fairly recently came across some photos of myself around that age and realized that I had nothing to be ashamed of as far as my appearance was concerned. Why the hell didn't I see fit to make a better choice?
Yes, there are winners and losers in life. I think there is a distinction to be made about the difference between coddling our children by shielding them from any unpleasantness (i.e. political correctness) and being cruel or harsh. It seems like in this as well as many other "hot topics" it always comes back to a loss of balance in society. Swinging to either end of the pendulum is a bad thing, but somehow we (society, I mean) can't seem to help ourselves.
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12
Going to college....
by PaulJ insomething i didn't do when i was someone growing up as a witness.... i start a degree in english and history in september... yay.
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CoonDawg
Cool! I hope to be starting down here at Edison College for the first 2 years for an Associates in Arts (gen. study) degreee and then transfer to Florida Gulf Coast University for their Bachelors program in Criminal Forensic Science. That's my plan anyhow. I was actually on line filling out my FAFSA paperwork today.
So, we'll be freshmen together! LOL I should be 41 when I graduate.