Posts by happysunshine

13

SPEAK OUT! about emotional blackmail....

by professor in

jw
friends

the watchtower society goons, in a power drunken stupor, are once again caught with their pants down, this time exposing their diabolical plan to undermine and exploit natural family love.. audacious, even for the watchtower, the message of the august 2002 kingdom ministry rings loud and clear to the rank and file: emotional blackmail can force your family back to us!

"after hearing a talk at a circuit assembly, a brother and his fleshly sister realized that they needed to make adjustments in the way they treated their mother, who lived elsewhere and who had been disfellowshipped for six years.

immediately after the assembly, the man called his mother, and after assuring her of their love, he explained that they could no longer talk to her unless there were important family matters requiring contact.

happysunshine

YICK! That km and web site change make me sick! I often wonder what influences the policy changes. Writting dept. staff member has a Bad Hair Day?

3

UN involvement: why?

by happysunshine in

i was blown away reading about the un and the 'library card' excuse.

but i have a question: why did they join?

was it to lift restrictions in banned countries?

happysunshine

I was blown away reading about the UN and the 'library card' excuse. But I have a question: Why did they join? Was it to lift restrictions in banned countries? Thanks- J

7

NAMING NAMES!

by happysunshine in

has anyone ever started a section just for legal cases/ possible legal cases?

or how about naming all the corrupt/ horror story jws you ever knew?

is it possible to get sued for telling your experiences and naming names - even if its not about criminal activity?

happysunshine

They're all true! I just wondered if there was any legal precedents/risks/or comments/ideas. Not only would it be a good resource for people who would otherwise never know the histories of sorted individuals, but a great way to vent ;-). Anyone?

13

Wayon brothers are JW's

by breeze in

jw
friends

are the wayons still considered jw's?

happysunshine

Where did you hear that?

64

Help a lurking dub with doubts

by undercover in

i've been lurking about, checking out some of the evidence against the wtbs.

i am currently inactive but still an approved/baptized member.

i have seen all the 1914/607bce evidence; the blood transfusion quandry evidence; the current child abuse problem evidence and several other things that are damning to the wt doctrines.

happysunshine

Hey-

BA2002- nice research, as always.

Undercover-
You're either a Troll, as Rodbar astutely mentioned, or you're working through you're feelings of confusion and guilt. If you're a Troll - Fuck Off. Otherwise, I'll finish this out as if you're legit.

I have so much I want to say, but I'm not an articulate writer, so bear with me. And there is much more to this than I have to say.

I'm assuming you were also born into it as I was. This affects our perception greatly, as factors other than those related to the issue of God and religion influence the way we look at the organization. What our parents did, our childhood friends are doing, or what we have to lose are totally unrelated to the issues of religious truth. Truth stands on its own. Things other than truth require mechanisms to hold them in place. A person 'encouraged' to make decisions by, in essence, holding their family at gunpoint is an example.

For me, even just looking at the issues freaked me out too much. Its not just about religion. Its about you're mother, your father - their parents. Your friends. Childhood ideas of good/bad, ideal situations, romance. Your brother, your sister. All the time, pain, suffering, and learning you and your family went through. Your own personal attitudes and the foundations for them. Dealing with this stuff ALONE is enough to give anyone a hard time, apart from the religious issue.

No one can tell you what to believe. You have to figure it out for yourself, and believe me, you wouldn't want it any other way.

Here are some things that worked for me: You have to identify some basic things that you believe in. You have to identify some points of reference. This will also help you keep your sanity in the face of psychological, social, emotional, and religious challenges that are all lumped together as spiritual things.
Something that also helped me was to look at other, unrelated examples/groups. These are good because all the other unrelated stuff, like ...but my parents are Witnesses and theyre good people... doesnt interfere. You are relatively objective. I saw similar patterns/methods being used/ identified all over the place: social psychology; sports psychology; marketing; Mormon Church; Jim Jones; etc. etc. I remember researching several sociology and psychology books for a project on cult dynamics which was totally unrelated to Witnesses, and it just clicked.
About being lazy, well thats up to you. The Witnesses are like any other group. Some people would leave because they are lazy, others because they have concerns. Not being enthusiastic about what youre doing because you have ethical concerns is a lot different than just being lazy.
About the book, I just went to a local Christian bookshop and they ordered it for me. Cash. Total anonymity.
About the confrontation thing. It is NOT a fair fight. It is about allegiance to the Watchtower Society (inc.). After much beating about the bush, theyll actually admit this. I am not kidding. At least in any setting were anyone is coming to you as a Witness.
A final word. I gave being a Witness everything I had. I ground myself into the ground living it. I know I didnt jump any bandwagons, have an impure heart, or anything else. It didnt work. I left with a clean conscience. Im lucky to be alive. -J

40

I am Back

by Robdar in

i finally got my head out of my ass, got some things done, and most importantly i am no longer suffering withdrawal from the vicodin that i took for 3 months before and after my surgery.

golly, that stuff is not good for you.

causes depression, crying jags, bad tempers, etc.

happysunshine

Congratulations on your success! Take care and welcome back.

Anyone ever try exercise/diet as a natural sleep inducer/ pain killer? -J

7

NAMING NAMES!

by happysunshine in

has anyone ever started a section just for legal cases/ possible legal cases?

or how about naming all the corrupt/ horror story jws you ever knew?

is it possible to get sued for telling your experiences and naming names - even if its not about criminal activity?

happysunshine

Has anyone ever started a section just for legal cases/ possible legal cases? Or how about naming all the corrupt/ horror story JWs you ever knew? Is it possible to get sued for telling your experiences and naming names - even if its not about criminal activity? I could really tell some good stories!

20

Ignoring trauma may be healthier

by MegaDude in

interesting article on yahoo news today that suggests repressing your emotions may be healthier than venting them.

i have my doubts about this, but here's the article below that i found at: http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story2&cid=570&ncid=753&e=1&u=/nm/20020924/sc_nm/health_stress_dc

stressed out?

happysunshine

Well put. This last year I started to adress the issue of witnesses and my family. Although I feel I have a really good cause and motivation, its caused all kinds of problems for me and dirupted my life. It may have been better to 'repressed'.

When it comes down to it, right or wrong, what you spend your time on becomes the center of your life.

11

Help me find proof

by showme in

so....today i asked a few questions to my girlfriend.

one thing led to another and my plan of not overwelming her with too many questions kind of went down the toobs.

questions about birthdays, holidays, john 1:1, why is it so important to stress the word donation, ect, ect.

happysunshine

Oh man-

I remember my mom and her friend telling me about how they were joking around in 1973. Her friend was buying a new chimney, and you could choose the 2 year or 10 year warranty. Her friend asked if it would be showing a lack of faith to buy the 10 year!

3

Attack of let go?

by happysunshine in

jw
friends

author

topic: ?to attack or let go?

read 220 times

happysunshine

Author

Topic: ?to attack or let go? Read 220 times

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happysunshine
Junior Member
Posts: 21
Since: Jun 17, 2002 Advertisement

Reasoning from the Scriptures With the Jehovah's Witnesses
Rhodes, Ron
~~$12.99~~ $9.48

?to attack or let go?	Sep 18, 2002 23:26
Do you think it is better to just live and let live with family that are witnesses, or will not confronting them with their beliefs come back to haunt you? -Wondering

JG
Senior Member
United States of America
Posts: 57
Since: Jun 4, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?	Sep 18, 2002 23:34
It's hard to say I'm going thru the same thing with my wife. I have tried to show her things but you can't show anyone anything if they keep their eyes closed. I am trying to go really slow and always do it in a loving manner no more yelling and pleading. I try to show my love as much as possible and let god work it out. I told her a month or so ago Eventually we will believe the exact same thing. It might be a very logn time but it's inevitable. Hang in there Sean

jjrizo
Master Member

United States of America
Posts: 682
Since: May 28, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 18, 2002 23:46

Even though my wife is inactive its still hard to see her still being a Jw, so I have to hold my tongue with her.

If I said what was on my mind it would most likely divide us even more.

Jim

Golden Girl
Master Member

Posts: 270
Since: Feb 6, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 00:03

Since JW Hubby has been diagnosed wih terminal cancer...I let it go! Sometimes I really have to bite my tongue. Before..I would show him things I got off the computor and showed him in his own literature. Now it doesn't even matter anymore! Funny how some things become so insignificant when major things happen in your life!

When his Mom and sister and him all gang up on me and tell me I really need to go back to the hall for his sake...Then I get upset! He sides with them and I feel so all alone. Just about that time one of my kids call and talk to me! That helps bring me back to my sanity!

BTW...I had to fill out his JW DPA. They weren't even aware of all the blood fractions they were allowed to take!...Sad isn't it. They believe everything they are told without question. They are so quick to say"NO BLOOD"...and don't even know about all the "Conscience changes

Golden Girl...aka...Snoozy

kelsey007
Senior Member
Posts: 59
Since: Jul 8, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 05:22

LET GO! My mother- only remaining member of my family is still a JW. At 78 it is the only social life she knows. I make a few comments but do not work to dampen her spirit.

Being an EX JW should only mean that the religion was not for you- As far as I am concerned ALL organized religion are cultist to various degrees. Some people just plain need that kind of structure in their lives....

Navigator
Senior Member
United States of America
Posts: 57
Since: Jun 5, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?	Sep 19, 2002 08:10
I vote with Kelsey! Relationships are too important to lose over a difference in religious beliefs. Your loving acceptance of them as a person regardless of their beliefs is an example of unconditional love which refutes the "conditional love" theology of the WTS. That doesn't mean, however, that you have to give up your own beliefs. I am deeply in love with my JW wife of 44 years, but would not set foot in a Kingdom Hall except for a funeral of one of our closest friends.

pettygrudger
Master Member
United States of America
Posts: 221
Since: Oct 8, 2001

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 08:55

I have to agree with Kelsey - my mother is 61 & so brainwashed, that even though I would love

to argue it out with her, and used to, I know now this is the life she chose, over her own children,

and she will die with this religion; I personally see her as such a frightened, uptight individual,

causing her doubts at this stage in her life (1st stages of alzheimers) could cause irrevokable

damage; I know how long it took me to get over (if I'm there) the JW life, I think it would be

cruel to cause that suffering in her - she doesn't have long enough to reap the benefits on the

other side of the struggle.

scootergirl
Master Member

United States of America
Posts: 435
Since: Jun 2, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?	Sep 19, 2002 08:58
My vote.......let it go. I don't want them preaching to me, so I don't preach to them. Plain and simple.

buffy
Junior Member
United States of America
Posts: 21
Since: Jun 1, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 09:51

You said it Scootergirl!!

I'm df'd and my active JW mother still talks to me on occasion. I'd rather have her talk to me alittle than not at all, so I choose to keep my mouth shut and keep the peace.

Buffy

Xander
Jedi Member

United States of America
Posts: 1641
Since: Feb 15, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 10:41

I don't want them preaching to me, so I don't preach to them.

You know, if it actually worked that way, it might be worth letting go.

Unfortunately, they are brainwashed to NEVER let it go. They will ALWAYS complain about your lack of faith, how close the end is, try pushing literature down your throat, etc, until the day they die or leave the org.

Case in point!

Since JW Hubby has been diagnosed wih terminal cancer....his Mom and sister and him all gang up on me and tell me I really need to go back to the hall for his sake...He sides with them.

Lovely!

Termincal cancer and the brainwashing is still so ingrained, he thinks of his religion first over his wife.

------------

See, THAT's what makes me hate them. THAT's why I won't give up.

Until they are 'out' - no matter HOW much you love them. No matter HOW much you care or HOW dire their situation is....you are nothing but bird food to them until you start going back to meetings.

That's disgusting.

(Edit to add opinion bit: I fear that if you are 'okay' with this, you are in denial about what they really think of you.)

Edited by - Xander on 19 September 2002 10:42:56

detective
Master Member
Posts: 568
Since: Jul 31, 2001

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 10:57

Let it go until...what?!? They die as a result of forgoing a potentially life saving blood transfusion? This will always be a risk- as long as they are members or consider it to be the truth. Of course, you might not even be faced with this, so I suppose it's a just a worst case scenario. But in the meantime... they are out attempting to convert others to this "religion". They are out trying to convince others to join up and possibly...maybe someday have those converts forgo a potentially life saving blood transfusion- or worse yet, deny their children such treatment.

I'm as torn as the next person on how to deal with this. I really don't know what the best thing is to do. But heaven forbid my beloved gets into a car accident and requires blood, I also don't want to know that I never spoke up either. So, I can hope that I never face that situation but there's no guarantee.

I really am unsure as to the best way to proceed. But I do feel as if I might be able to help in a larger sense by seeing that my loved one gets free and doesn't attempt to enslave others. Ultimately, I feel like I can let them go on merrily, but what of the others they are misinforming?

I don't know what to either. I just don't know.

mamashel
Senior Member
Posts: 93
Since: Aug 14, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 11:00

It really depends on how they would react to it. Maybe share alittle at a time, and see what the reaction will be, then take it from there. Most jw's that you try to talk to though it is like beating a dead horse.

Good luck

mamashel

BadJerry
Junior Member
Posts: 29
Since: Aug 19, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?	Sep 19, 2002 11:57
Argue or debate is just a waste of time........that won't change anything. On the other hand, planning, plotting, conspiring and de-programming, that to me is the only way to proceed. Takes work and imagination to level-set the playing field, but that's what I did! And, we are ALL out. BadJerry

scootergirl
Master Member

United States of America
Posts: 435
Since: Jun 2, 2002

Re: ?to attack or let go?

Sep 19, 2002 11:59

xander wrote:

you are in denial about what they really think of you

I know all too well what they think of me.......but that is okay. Cause what they think of me doesn't matter anymore. I am happy and that is all that matters. There is a time to let go and that time is now for me.

~Christy (of the "finally at peace" class)