I found value in making a list because it made me evaluate so many relationships. I also still had individuals that I didn't treat so hot that I realized I will not apologize to. I treat everyone better than I did when I was hardcore JW but not everyone qualified for a formal apology. You will find that most people, outside the org, are not just sitting around judging our every move like witnesses do. So an apology is very much appreciated and most will move on and base their future with you on your future treatment if them. Simple.
Sheep2slaughter
JoinedPosts by Sheep2slaughter
-
19
Not better than others
by sinedie inas jw's we are taught that we are better than others; that we are almost superior to them.
after finding out ttatt, and realizing that others are actually smarter than me, i feel quite small and insecure about myself.
how do i start friendships with people i knew (sort of) for years, who i was trying to convince that the end is coming soon?
-
-
-
19
Not better than others
by sinedie inas jw's we are taught that we are better than others; that we are almost superior to them.
after finding out ttatt, and realizing that others are actually smarter than me, i feel quite small and insecure about myself.
how do i start friendships with people i knew (sort of) for years, who i was trying to convince that the end is coming soon?
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
I had a similar struggle. Mine was with people in the congregation mostly tho but in theory I think the course I chose will work for you. I made a basic list in my head of the people I felt I had treated inappropriately; looked for opportunity(without forcing circumstances); and then straight apologized with no reservations. Most I told something to the effect that "my thinking and views on many thing have changed and as that change has occurred I could see the error in how I viewed and treated them. I don't know why I thought or acted that way but I'm sorry and will always treat you with dignity, concern and love. I'm sorry. Cheers"
-
35
Hardest most awkward parts of being mentally out but physically in
by BU2B ini am still physically in but am completely out mentally.. i was curious for those who spent some time in the borg while being mentally out or are still in that position, what is the worst, hardest or most awkward parts... for me i intensly dislike attending the meetings however its bearable as i can just let my mind wander, but field service is awful.
i cannot try to bring someone in to a group that i am trying to plot a way out of.
so now i try my best to either spend the day driving around to others fruitless rv's (we have somewhat rural territory) or eating out at an extended breakfast or if door to door cannot be avoided, i try to work alone and not ring bells.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
Don't listen to just mom. It's way more complicated than just "be true to yourself, don't be a hypocrite blah blah blah"...You have a wife and child. That makes it infinitely more complicated than justmom is trying to make it. Like I and many others have said...be patient. Take it slow. I'm still in. So many are still in. What's funny is I'm finding others that are still in, in my own congregation. Each of us is in or out to varying degrees. If its so easy for Justmom why is she still here in this site? Cuz it's freaking complicated and not as easy as her previous post tries to convey.
-
43
Blondie is awesome!!!
by Sheep2slaughter ini'm just sayin... blondie...are you a lawyer or investigator or what!?
her/your weekly watchtower comments we won't hear at the watchtower indoctrination are amazing.
so much work.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
I didn't mean to cause such a stir but glad to know that all us "hateful, vile, mentally diseased, evil apostates" see value in people and appreciate them. There are so many great people on this site and I/we really appreciate the help, advice, concern, research and love we all show here. Thanks to all of you...my faith in human kindness is renewed daily.
-
42
Was There Anything You Actually Enjoyed About Being A JW?
by MrFreeze ini'm sure this question has been raised a lot but it is always good to look back.
the last 5 or 6 years of me being a jw, i did not have a very good go of it.
one thing i actually did enjoy was going to the international convention.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
When I was hard core I enjoyed a lot of it. It's weird actually...it's like there was a certain level of fulfillment and entitlement or something intanglible I can't put my finger on. They credit it to holy spirit but that's not it. It's almost some narcissistic complex masked by fake self sacrifice blended with superiority by judging others. Kinda...
-
43
Blondie is awesome!!!
by Sheep2slaughter ini'm just sayin... blondie...are you a lawyer or investigator or what!?
her/your weekly watchtower comments we won't hear at the watchtower indoctrination are amazing.
so much work.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
Didn't know she was married....dammit....my next thread was gonna be an apostaposal...too late I guess,, lol(I'm happily married so don't trip)
-
43
Blondie is awesome!!!
by Sheep2slaughter ini'm just sayin... blondie...are you a lawyer or investigator or what!?
her/your weekly watchtower comments we won't hear at the watchtower indoctrination are amazing.
so much work.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
I'm just sayin... Blondie...are you a lawyer or investigator or what!? Her/your weekly watchtower comments we won't hear at the watchtower indoctrination are amazing. So much work. Then in the threads she/you often support your comments with Watchtower references...amazing...
Thanks for being awesome!
-
21
Just wondering, who here is still a JW? x
by snare&racket injust wondering who here still attends meetings, and lives the jw life?
i guess its interesting for the context of peoples comments.
also does anyone have a position such as pioneer, ms, elder etc ?.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
@dog is god Man sorry to hear about your mom and bro. No matter how long ago or how recent...I know there are moments when it hurts terribly...sorry for their deaths.
-
41
How do you deal with your "down" time?
by compound complex inby that, i don't mean so much what you do in your leisure time but how you manage the freedom to choose what you will or will not do.
off the wt treadmill, i no longer feel guilty about what is now my neglect of theocratic activity; however, after a nonstop week such as i have just lived through (barely), i am doing nothing, going nowhere, and accepting no new obligations (for the moment).
i can stare at the sky, enjoy the beautiful day and not worry that demons are rushing to fill the void in my empty skull.. you?.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
I work during the day, spend time with my family in evenings, have fun with friends and family on weekends!! Love life!
Oh yeah....FIRST...(so immature. Lol)
-
56
Greetings! My first post
by BU2B inhello all at jwn!
i have been a lurker here the last few months and have been going through the process of researching both sides of the story of jehovahs witnesses.
i was raised in the borg, got married and now have a young child.. my wife is very much dedicated to the organization and will justify anything the "slave" does putting it off on the borgs imperfection.
-
-
Sheep2slaughter
Welcome. My advice to you comes from personal experience and being in a very similar situation(as are many here so you will find great support here).
BE PATIENT. Continue to be an exemplary husband in the love and respect you show your wife. Take the advice others have given about family outings. Continue to be a great a dad. Guard your tongue but pay close attention for opportunities to expand on things she disagrees with in the congregation or organization. Above all BE PATIENT. This is a long journey and we are only just past the starting line.