Heartsafire

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Posts by Heartsafire

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  44

  Need advice

  by Darkknight757 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hi.i've been pouring over this site for the past few days looking for some advice and i hope there is someone here that can help a guy out.

  i'm desperate.....short bio: i came into the organization after high school and shortly after married a wonderful girl who was born-in.we have been happily married now for nearly 20 years and things were well until 2015 hit.

  by the way, i currently serve as an elder and have the ""privilege"" of being the "watchtower overseer".. either here nor there, we were told we would never have children but late last year my wife became prego!!

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  Heartsafire

  Darkknight,

  My heart goes out to you and your wife as you both grieve.

  I totally understand how you feel about wanting out of the org as I am currently fading despite the fact that my husband is still very much in.

  Everyone's situation is different in pulling off a successful fade. I am not certain the best route for you to go on this, but others here can help you as they have been elders/ms before. Given your wife's miscarriages, however, I could see this being a very acceptable reason in the eyes of the congregation for stepping down as an elder--depression, etc.

  The way I have chosen to fade is by backing off on serve-us and meeting attendance and simultaneously focusing my time and attention on my husband and our relationship. At first it was hard but it's gotten easier with time.

  Anyway, welcome to the site, and I wish you and your wife all the best.
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  43

  Did Jesus really die on a cross?

  by macys in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  being raised a catholic we had lots of crosses around the house.

  when my family converted to this cult they were all removed and destroyed in case they had demons in them lol but at this juncture in my life i do not even know if jesus as the way he is portrayed in the bible was real.

  yes a man named jesus did live and die 2000 years ago and probably on a cross but he was definitely not the son of god.

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  Heartsafire

  Lieu,

  ...and John 21:19? Edited to say: It is true that Peter died while a prisoner, however, early Christians claimed he was executed on an upside down cross. If this is the case, it is probable that Jesus's prediction of dying with his hands "outstretched" was more than just a description of shackles. All in all, who really knows? Although, it doesn't prove my point wrong that crucifixion was commonly used by Romans at the time.
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  10

  A little ray of hope.

  by username in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  for all those who have recently escaped this evil cult i just want to send a message of hope.. i have just had my landlord around.

  one of the first things the landlord said to me.

  "in just a year i see such a big positive difference in you" .

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  Heartsafire

  Congrats on your freedom and positivity! I am honestly a little jelly of you right now. Boy, I wish I was totally out. I'm still fading and taking it easy because of my nutty spouse. But, I do feel more free lately--free from guilt, time consuming activities, and fake friends, not to mention depressing articles and lectures. Waking up each day feels like an adventure. I kind of don't mind the fight to escape because I see light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks for that great info from the other side!
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  43

  Did Jesus really die on a cross?

  by macys in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  being raised a catholic we had lots of crosses around the house.

  when my family converted to this cult they were all removed and destroyed in case they had demons in them lol but at this juncture in my life i do not even know if jesus as the way he is portrayed in the bible was real.

  yes a man named jesus did live and die 2000 years ago and probably on a cross but he was definitely not the son of god.

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  Heartsafire

  Yes, that scripture about the print of the nails in his hands is a good one.

  Here's a scripture that shows the sign Pilate posted was above his head (it doesn't say above his hands--although I guess that is possible). Matthew 27: 37 They also posted above his head the charge against him, in writing: “This is Jesus the King of the Jews.”

  Crucifixion was commonly used at the time, and Jesus prophecied how Peter would also die with his hands outstretched at John 21:18 Most truly I say to you, when you were younger, you used to clothe yourself and walk about where you wanted. But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands and another man will clothe you and carry you where you do not wish.” 19 He said this to indicate by what sort of death he would glorify God. After he said this, he said to him: “Continue following me.”
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  16

  Goodwill stores: A gathering place for Jehovahs Witnesses.

  by Joliette in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i recently started working at a goodwill here in wisconsin, and i've never encountered more witnesses ever in my life.

  every time i go to work, i see at least two or three people that i used to go to the kingdom hall with getting suits, dresses, etc.

  some of them say hi, but some of them i just ignore, or they ignore me.

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  Heartsafire

  So that's where all those faded prairie skirts and baggy polyester suits are coming from. Well, I guess this is to be expected when most of these folks are cleaning offices and washing windows for a living. Meanwhile, we hear about GB members running around in expensive suits and sporting expensive watches...
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  29

  What is Your Favorite JW YouTube Video?

  by cognac in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  maybe it's shocking, funny, a good story, etc.. i was just watching the one below... i was shocked!

  .

  https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=e7qmypu7mxo.

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  Heartsafire

  Cognac,

  That YouTube video you posted is definately one of my top favs. The looks on the JWs faces are priceless.

  I saw it a few weeks ago and occasionally will imitate his thick accent around the house, "lit'l cheldruhn off Jeehovahs Witnesyess.."
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  35

  Hello from an exmormon

  by Cold-Dodger in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  someone named john free popped in on one of my posts at exmormon[dot]com and mentioned this website.

  i have a lot of questions.

  i never knew much about about the jw church.

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  Heartsafire

  Cold dodger,

  I really enjoyed your post and found it fascinating.

  To fulfill your request, I must say that growing up within the JW religion can be quite stressful. There is a lot of guilt and fear involved such as fear that God will kill you at Armageddon if you don't follow his rules and preach. And, if you don't preach when you have the opportunity to do so, then God will kill those who did not get the message at Armageddon, and you will be blood guilty. So, there is a lot of guilt when it comes to not doing all you can do 100% all of the time as a JW.

  Like Mormons, JWs can overdo it with the cheerfulness especially when it comes to finding new recruits. People who showed any interest in the message were fawned and gushed over. Typically people we met in the ministry were reasonably kind and would simply say, "No thank you," if they were uninterested in the message. However, there was sometimes a very upset person and they would yell, cuss, or challenge us. JWs believe any opposition to the message is from the devil and is "persecution," which is actually a sign to a JW that they are doing something right and making God happy.

  Of course (in the US) there was the awkwardness of not saluting the flag, not standing for the national anthem, not celebrating birthdays or holidays, not toasting a drink, nor saying "bless you" to a person who sneezes, etc. that made having a social life outside of the org a real challenge. All witnesses, including children, are taught that anyone who isn't a JW is "worldly" and is to be completely avoided unless they want to study the Bible with you.

  The JW religion has really changed quite a bit in "new light", preaching methods, and other ways from the days when I was young. Heck, even the last few years I would venture to say the org as a whole has morphed quite a bit with its new dot org website, literature carts, and Internet broadcasts. The guilt and fear hasn't changed one bit though.
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  50

  My family has known I'm an apostate

  by cognac in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found out that my husband has not only gone to the elders, but has been going to members of my family about me over a period of a few years.

  this piece of news is just so depressing.

  i've been wondering how my family knew i didn't go and thats why so many of them have becoming more and more distant.

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  Heartsafire

  Cognac, I am so sorry he did this to you and that you are hurting. Rude, coniving, arrogant, thoughtless are a few words that describe his actions. Maybe he was acting out of concern but deceit is still deceit and it isn't okay. I'm struggling with my JW-crazed husband too.

  edited to say: Oh crap, this is an older thread. And...that's enough internet for me tonight.
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  82

  INSPIRED ERROR: new phrase among JW CO

  by wannaexit in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there is no end to their madness.

  the co gave a talk on inspired error.

  i have never heard of it.

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  Heartsafire

  It is mind controlling drivel like this that make my efforts to wake up my hubby so much harder because now he will be thinking any news article I bring up is from demons. I wonder if this means the GB will no longer be quoting from secular sources in any articles because they're all "inspired error". OMG I hate this cult!!!
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  71

  Doing the Right Thing, Making a Choice (shunning)

  by Simon in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  continuing a topic that is dear to my heart because of my experience as both a shunner and a shunnee .... some people seem to get very agitated when i talk about the responsibility people have to make the right choices and that despite all the wrongs within the wts, people themselves have a role to play and some personal responsibility for the experience.. notice i said "some" responsibility, not "complete" - this doesn't absolve the wts for the things they do wrong in any way shape or form.

  so please don't get argumentative about possible meanings and absolutes - of course the wts has a significant role to play but we need to decide what we're trying to achieve here and why the personal choice is so important.. i'm also not talking about actual crimes that the wts should answer for.

  if they cover up child abuse for instance, they absolutely should be reported immediately.

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  Heartsafire

  Simon, it is true that it is an individual choice. There are talks from the podium all the time addressing the fact that some Jdubbs ignore the borg's shunning rules and have dealings with their df'd/da'd family, so some people obviously aren't in favor of the practice. But, I really don't see the rules on shunning changing anytime soon. It would take, as you mentioned, a revolutionary person to come into power to change the rules, or the org would have to bleed membership on an unprecedented scale based upon the shunning policy for the GB to consider making changes. I think the average Jdub that shuns does it out of fear of the org. However, it seems that in some people shunning activates a dark and sinister need to elevate themselves over other people acting beneath their "standards". It's a sick practice, and how to stigmatize it with the r&f is a mystery to me.