I agree with Roybatty. My Dad left home, committed adultery, etc. He started smoking. For some reason, they df'd him for that. He was not present. They told my mom and announced it. Then, about two years later, my sister committed fornication (they figured it out because her baby was born 6 months after her marriage) She was not present either-no meetings with the elders, just a JC that decided she was a whore. My mother, divorced and dating a 'worldly', committed fornication once (I got all the details as a 15 year old). She confessed and begged forgiveness from the elders. They promptly df'd her. If she had been dating a JW, it might not have been so swift. She even dumped her boyfriend. I don't know if it was bad sex or because she was df'd.
teenyuck
JoinedPosts by teenyuck
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16
All are not equal before judicial committees
by roybatty inthis is nothing new but there seems to be a lot of advice on what to do when the elders call you to meet with them before a judicial committee.
at the risk of sounding arrogant, ill give you the perspective that i had as an elder sitting on a judicial committee.
it doesnt matter if youre before the committee for apostasy, fornication, smoking, drinking or anything else.
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Years in v. Years Out
by Billygoat ini'd like to find out how many years collectively we have acquired in the wts.
please list how many years you were/have been a jw.
please also list how many years you have been out.
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teenyuck
In 17 years
Out 19 years
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Overweight JWs -- on the increase?
by Seeker inyes, i know, the title is a pun.
it was deliberate.. i can recall in the 1970s seeing very few overweight jws.
in fact, i used to think (in my arrogant jw manner) that this was a sign of how jws were better at self-control than worldly people.
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teenyuck
One question I have asked my deeply JW family--why is it OK to kill yourself with saturated fat and not get DF'd? Why does a smoker who kills him/herself with tobacco get DF'd? Both are addicted to something. One is chips and fries, the other cigarettes.
Obesity and the related health issues (diabetes, heart disease etc) are just as deadly and just as "dirty."
My family has no answer, except that the JW's are lightening up (no pun) on smoking.
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Death of a JW (My weekend experience)
by teenyuck inchester never was jw.
my mother still has not become a jw.
father re-marries within 2 years, starts new family.
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teenyuck
I believe they do produce and maintain dysfunction. My family is proof of that. There are so many "old friends of the family" my mother tells me about...none of the information she passes on is positive. It is always gossip about who is getting divorced, DF'd, etc.
I wish I had the courage to stand up at my uncle's funeral and pay tribute to his kindness and sense of humor. I really wanted to. I was cowardly and took the silent approach. I cried and when the family asked why I was crying so hard, I explained that while the brother was giving his fire and brimstone speech, I was thinking about all the fun I had with my uncle. He deserved a eulogy that went over his contributions to the community (taught little league) and his family (he always could lighten up a room with his sense of humor).
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A few things I don't understand about the bible
by Leander inthere have always been things about the bible that never really made much sense to me.
not to say that i disagree with whats in the bible but i have wondered about the fairness of certain things.. 1. for example i've always even as a child thought that it was odd that so many people would die during armageddon.
now as an adult and i understand people better than i did years ago i really do feel puzzled about the fact that according to the scriptures the majority of mankind will perish.
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teenyuck
Leander-think about history. There has always been a super power. Remember the Romans? How about the Brits-
before we kicked their ass? What about Egypt? It was a super power for thousands of years.As to famine and pestilence-WAKE UP! Humans have never been as healthy as they are today. With the changes in
sanitation and food prep, the rate of death has gone down. Have you notice many more people 100 years and older on
NBC in the morning with Willard Scott? We are eating better than ever. The world, for the most part is too fat! The few
countries that are in a famine are third world. However, without the help of the US and other countries, they would have
been wiped out.You sound like you are trying to justify staying in the borg and using the age old reason of the prophecy to stay in. These
"prophecies" have been true for the 6000 years of recorded history we know of. -
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Its the Whole Premise that Gets Me
by pettygrudger in#1 - original sin: supposedly all this stuff is going on because adam/eve "ate the fruit" (type of fruit still under question).
because of this, god let billions & billions of people, "his children", suffer imperfection, pestilence, plague, wars,death, etc.
& let his "true followers" throughout bible history be persecuted because of this "original sin".
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teenyuck
I love this discussion!
I have debated this, also with my mother, since I was a small child. I now debate it with my catholic husband. He has
no ready answers, as the JW's do. He believes that there is heaven and if I will at least believe in that we will be
together forever. I love him dearly and wish I could be with him forever, but the questions raised here are the exact
reason I now consider my self agnostic. I do not necessarily believe in a God, however, my point is what everyone
else has pointed out.If God were all knowing and powerful, he knew Eve was going to mess up, Satan was going bad...etc. We are lab rats
in a great experiment. -
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Death of a JW (My weekend experience)
by teenyuck inchester never was jw.
my mother still has not become a jw.
father re-marries within 2 years, starts new family.
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teenyuck
Chester the Molester was the name my mother and aunts called their father when he was not around. Or "the buzzard".
He was extremely tight with a dollar-hence that nick name.I really appreciate the opportunity to write and have objective people "listen." When trying to discuss issues with my
mother, she gets angry and hangs up. (We live hundreds of miles away.) -
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Too late or never too late ?
by slamming_vinyl inmy names craig and i'm from england.
when i was younger (i'm 23 now) my parents decided to join a congregation, and used to take me along, i used to have a regular nice chap who used to come visit me for regular book study to which i thoroughly enjoyed.
after a while i got bored and rebelled against everything, i used to go out shoplifting, fornicate all sorts!!..
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teenyuck
Hello Craig,
I do not think it is ever too late. However, think about all the times the JW's have predicted Armageddon. Too many.
Do you really want to go back to a group of judgemental people, who will shun you at the first opportunity? It sounds
like you may already be shunned. Is this christian? Is that what Jesus would do? No, of course not! He would try to
help and encourage the person who needed it. Not throw them out for infractions.If you have turned your life around and you really feel you need spirituality, look at other religions. There is nothing
wrong with arming yourself with information and facts. Education is the key to learning what works best for you. The
JW's are terrified that we will go out and find that there are many religions that are similar. My extended family and my
mother are JW's. My sister and my father are DF'd. They are much happier. They do not have a "Jehovah will save
us if we give ourselves to him". When I ask my family about the UN issue and the blood issue, they say, "Oh the
brothers are imperfect. They are just making predictions". So I am supposed to live my life based upon a tried and
failed approach!! No!!!I urge you to re-think the urge to jump back in just because of September 11.
Good luck and best wishes.
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worst site for any Convention
by hillbilly inwhat do you consider the worst venues holding conventions?.
indoor?, outdoor?.
my votes go to: #1- the hollywood (broward county)florida "sportatorium" why?
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teenyuck
In the Chicago area, the outdoor assembly's were held at Hawthorne race track. I do not know how the JW's got the
racetrack, in the middle of summer, to hold an assembly. That was really bad. The horse feces did not add to the
experience. Expecially in July.However, worst, in the Chicago area, was an old theater on the south side of Chicago, about 7900 south. If you know
Chicago, you know that unless you are black or a cop, firefighter, EMT, you do not go to that neighborhood. It was
awful. Old, smelly, terrible drive.Those are my fond [8>] memories.
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Death of a JW (My weekend experience)
by teenyuck inchester never was jw.
my mother still has not become a jw.
father re-marries within 2 years, starts new family.
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teenyuck
On Oct. 8 my uncle G. died. He was a JW, a prior Ministerial Servant and Elder. Quick rundown on family history to
make sense of coming story and subsequent question: Greatgranddad Mike (my mother's father, father) was JW with
wife Sophie since 1914. Both part of the 144,000. She became "Evil Slave", he stayed married. They had one son, my
mother's father, Chester. Chester never was JW. He was, however, an acknowledged child molester. Chester meets
Helen, (Helen is my mother's mother), marries and has 4 daughters. Helen listens to Mike over the years and decides
she wants to be a JW. Chester does not, neither do 4 daughters. Chester and Helen fight, often. Helen leaves
Chester in approximately 1951. She is convinced she is also one of the 144,000 and must preach. Helen takes to
the streets of Chicago, preaching. Her four daughters, oldest age 12, are left with Chester. Chester and Helen are
divorced. Helen has no contact with children.Cut to 1955. Oldest daughter, my mother, begs Helen's mother, to let her come live with her, because Chester is
peeking in on her in the bath. Mother's grandma petitions court and wins custody of my mother when my mother
was 16. Other siblings are left to "Chester the Molester". My mother still has not become a JW. She sisters leave
home at various stages over the next 5 years. They all married vrey young to escape Chester.Cut to 1958. My mother meets my father, she gets pregnant and they wed. My sister is born. I come to be a few
years later. In 1967, JW's come to door. My mother lets them in. Starts studying. Becomes JW. My father is still
not there, however, he lets her do it. Dad decides to become JW in about 1969. In meantime, all mother's sisters
and their husbands are studying. Mike, the old "Annointed" one, is still in the picture. He is thrilled that some of
his family are involved. During family get togethers, Great-Grandmother Sophie is shunned. She is an Evil Slave
and we are not allowed to speak to her. She sits alone, in corner, during any family gathering. She never speaks.Cut to 1970. My mother's youngest sister is the girlfriend of a married, wealthy man. He is supporting her, her two
children. He rents them a very nice apartment. (Aunt #4 husband decided JW not for him, he walked out; she was
never baptised.) My mother, being a good JW, tells her sister she is a fornicating whore and she will not speak to
her until she dumps her "sugar daddy" and gives her life to Jehovah. My aunt tells her to get fucked. She is 20
years old, with 2 kids, no education and he is a lifeline. My mother cuts my aunt off. She is now shunned. She is
not a JW, not baptised, however, after my mother speaks to the elders at the congregation, she is told that if she
associates with her sister, she is approving of her fornication. My mother does not speak to her sister for approximately
5 years.Cut to 1973. My father, being frustrated by my mother's declining sexuality (she refused to do anything but the
missionary position after becoming a JW, in a strange twist of fate!) starts to sleep around. Mother, with children
in tow, catches him a few times with other women. Finally throws him out. Literally. Takes all clothing and throws
in driveway for him to find when he comes home. (daughters are asked to help)In 1975, Crazy Helen, (as she is known now) suddenly calls her first daughter (my mother) and acts like she saw her
yesterday. It has been about 25 years. She is now remarried (she had decided that Chester the Molester) must have
committed adultery so she is free to remarry. Helen weighs about 300 pounds; so does her husband. They are both
on welfare and disability. She states she has never worked-she found a way for the evil government to pay her bills
so she can preach. However, due to her large girth, she cannot get out preaching much. Helen starts quoting bible
scriptures. Helen askes if she can come visit. It turns out she is visiting her mother and staying with her. My mother
arranges to have all the sisters come over and meet Helen. All family shows up and Helen rants about
Armageddon. She quotes scriptures. She never askes how the women and their families are doing. She never
apologizes for leaving them with a molester. She says the end is near, so she must see them one last time! I am angry
at Helen for disrupting our life. She is frightening. She has shocking red hair, and large, round eyes. I yell at her and
tell her she is an Evil Slave, not an Annointed one. Helen starts chasing me (as best she could); I run and get outside.
I go to a neighbors house. This neighbor has not shunned us for being JW. They are just nice. No questions. Cookies,
milk and a hug. I do not go home, until I see the cars leave. Helen never visits Chicago again. She had moved to
California and does not even return for her mother's funeral. I never saw her again, though she did phone about 3 times
over the next 15 years.1974, parents divorce. Father re-marries within 2 years, starts new family. Mother starts to date. She will only date
men with no children and money. Not very likely in the JW organization. Unless they are the age of 85 and bachelors.
Mother starts to date "Worldly" men. Her sisters, in meantime, have been in touch with the fornicating youngest
sister. The two middle sisters, #'s 2 and 3, whose husbands have been elders and ministerial servants, realize that
shunning and cutting off sister # 4 serves no purpose except for control, by sister # 1, my mother. They decide that if
my mother won't talk to sister #4, they won't talk to her. She is now shunned by sisters # 2, 3, and 4. Until their
mother comes back to town. The pull of seeing someone they have not seen since they were children is too strong.
Mohter and her sisters are back in touch.Cut to 1976. Armageddon did not happen. Many in congregation are still shell shocked, wondering how they are
going to pay bills-many sold businesses and quit jobs to go on vacations, before "the end of things as we know it."
My sister, who is now 17, is wondering how she is going to find a boyfriend to "take care of her." My mother has not
promoted education-who needs it? Not only will you have a husband to do everything, you will be in Paradise!! Sister
meets worldly at a JW wedding. He is the younger cousin of mother's good friend. Sister and mother fight over sister
dating worldly. (it's ok for mom, not for sis). Sis runs away and lives with him. She drops out of high school and is
pregnant within months. She is then Disfellowshipped (DF'd) for fornication. She never spoke with the elders. My
mother did. She gave them all the details.While she was at it, Mom decided she might as well tell them that my father had started smoking. (father had dropped
off radar of elders) Elders immediately DF'd him for smoking. Mother is still dating worldlies.Mom, apparently in a fit of hormones, breaks down and sleeps with her worldly boyfriend of two years. She then comes
home and in a fit of guilt, confesses all to her 15 year old daughter-Me. I advise Mom to keep mum. She is sorry,
just don't do it again-or get married. I like her boyfriend. He is very nice and divorced, so is his family. He has two young boys; I
always wanted brothers.Mother cannot help herself. She decides to confess to the elders what she did. They promply DF her!!! She puts on
letter writing campaign and begs CO for second chance. Somehow, they overturn her DF'ing! While all this is happening
on the home front, my mother's sisters and husbands have waning interest in the JW's. They stop going in service and
going to meetings. One of these uncle's is the one who passed away this past week.In the ensuing years, my aunt's # 2 and 3, get back involved with the JW's. Uncle G was married to aunt #2. He went
in service and to the meetings once in a while. His younger daughter comes out of closet. She has never been baptised.
Uncle is the nicest, sweetest man. He always had a smile and a joke, even when his wife and my mother were fighting
about something stupid. It is very sad to see him pass. He was afraid to have surgery, because of the blood issue. He
died of a massive heart attack.Cut to his wake. There are many family and extended family members. My DF'd sister and father show up. No one in
the family shuns them. (old grandma Sophie/Evil Slave, dies in approximately 1985, no JW's come to her funeral-only
family. Old man Mike the "Annointed" one, has a funeral that would make the Queen Mother proud). Anyway, at the
wake, a brother from my uncle's congregation, gives a "fire and brimstone" speech. He brings up Armegaddon so many
times, I lose count. He sounds like he is trying to recruite the non-believers who show up. Half of the people at the
wake are co-workers of uncle G. He worked at the same company for over 40 years. The eulogy was very disappointing.After the wake, a group of us, including an elder and his wife, and her good friend, went to a coffee shop across the
street from the funeral home. As we were having coffee, the elder starts telling stories about the new system. I am
biting my tounge. The friend of the wife, Angie, tells him to pray for her. He askes why. She says there are now
so many "blacks" in the Chicago congreations, that when she gets a piece of paradise, she wants it to be vanilla,
not chocolate!! She smiles and says "they are taking over the congregations". It is getting too rowdy. Good Christian.
I am sure God has a place for people like her. I do not think it is paradise or heaven for that matter.Questions: Many witnesses were there; they knew my father and sister were DF'd, however, they spoke to them-is this
normal?Is a eulogy about the last days the new norm?
Any good responses to the relatives who want to get me back into the JW's, without hurting their feelings? (I have
disassociated my self. Never formally, however, I made it clear to them at the funeral , I do not agree with the teachings.
I did bring up the UN issue. No one in my family was aware the the JW's were apart of the UN.)Any info on the racial issues? I do recall many black members, however, they were just like everyone else-ardent!
Thanks for taking the time to read this. It felt good to write it and put the history down on paper, so to speak.
Any thoughts and/or opinions would be welcomed.