What parts exactly, did you love? Most people, "good" JWs or exJWs, really minded doing some of the stuff you had to do. Going to 5 hours of meetings a week, studying, going door-to-door, much of that can be a real burden to some.
It's normal to feel alone and angry inside. You've been fooled, and that makes you angry. Who could blame you? Many of us here are extremely angry and bitter. People have lost much--family, educations, careers. And for what? To help an organization get rich.
As far as being alone, you need to make new friends. I actually created my own new "family" since I no longer have the one I was born with. Go back to school... cultivate friendships at work. Do some volunteering. Lots of ways to meet new folks.
Knowledge is power. Keep researching the organization. Have you visited Quotes.JehovahsWitnesses.com yet? It's a terrific web site. All it is are quotes from the Watchtower. Really.
And yes, it's hard to smile on the outside and be upset on the inside. That's one of the worst things... how you become a mask, never being able to truly say how you feel.
I'm glad you have seen the "real" light. May you now find freedom, and peace, and unconditional love.
Hugs, V