please share your experiences with being labeled as "bad association".
i was labelled with limted and distasteful association after i was caught smoking pot at school with some of my friends ( i am not condoning drug taking as a teenager, drug experimentation if possible should be kept until after you have finished developing into adulthood) thanks and look forward to your stories........
Every young jw with a non-jw father was marked as bad association in my congregation including me... Blondie
I concur; although my father was dfe'd ... added to that I'm an introvert by nature, meaning that I did not fit in and had only 1 or 2 close friends.
Not a pleasant experience by any stretch of the imagination.
i've always had the impression that they frowned upon it, but never quite knew for sure.....
I remember a comment made to me once by a brother; 'a bowl of soup never makes a christian'
My response; 'a magazine never filled an empty stomach'.
If looks could kill, I would have been dead!
i have far too many to name, however, i have noticed obscene music, cussing, lying and secretive gambling to name a few.
thoughts?.
I recall, many years ago, a brother delivering a part on the service meeting and the 'old chestnut' of not pursuing higher education was one of the main points. What do you need higher education for when the end is so near, right!
Meanwhile his daughter was studying for a university degree.
when you finally and officially exited the cult, whether it be by disfellowshipping, disassociating or fading - what was the first things you did that are considered "worldly"?.
for me, it was like crash landing on another planet that looked like earth but was completely different to the earth i knew.
i wanted to learn everything that i thought i already knew.. first things i did:.
Completed higher education and obtained Chartered membership of my profession
Now I enjoy living life on my own terms and no longer having to jump to the Orgs whims.
when you were "in" did you ever actually enjoy the ministry?
and i made no secret about it.
instead i would joke about me feather knocking, and made sure i had my bible in hand so as they come to the door they know what im about so they can shut me down before i even start.. i always wondered how or why there were people who enjoyed it.
I never did like field service and worst facet, for me, was street work.
my wife is in the hospital.
complications of a ruptured appendix.
she had it removed around 1am friday morning.
Azor
Sorry to read of this distressing situation. As others have said; the well-being and health of your wife is your number one priority.
Let your mom take of the children and kudos to her.
Ignore the other family who shun you.
abuse is such a serious word and i'd hate to use it lightly so if anyone reading this has suffered physical or sexual abuse please know that i absolutely do not equate religious abuse with your suffering.
that being said, many of us were lied to and manipulated for decades.
this cultic 'abuse' has borne fruit in shattered relationships, broken families and estranged children.
Outlaws post above ^^^^
I too studied that book - Paradise Lost To Paradise Regained - as a kid. Thinking back, some of those images in the book were very disturbing.
abuse is such a serious word and i'd hate to use it lightly so if anyone reading this has suffered physical or sexual abuse please know that i absolutely do not equate religious abuse with your suffering.
that being said, many of us were lied to and manipulated for decades.
this cultic 'abuse' has borne fruit in shattered relationships, broken families and estranged children.
It is an abusive organization, once we wake up though, I prefer to see myself as survivor instead of victim .... freemindfade
Couldn't agree more ^^^^ We are survivors.
“but now i am writing you to stop keeping company with anyone called a brother who is sexually immoral or a greedy person or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man” ... (bold & italics mine).
my question is; if a brother or sister is disfellowshipped for whatever reason and therefore technically they are no longer a jw (brother or sister), then how can they use the above scripture as a basis to shun you..
“But now I am writing you to stop keeping company with anyone called a brother who is sexually immoral or a greedy person or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man” ... (bold & italics mine)
My question is; if a brother or sister is disfellowshipped for whatever reason and therefore technically they are no longer a JW (brother or sister), then how can they use the above scripture as a basis to shun you.
ok so i have a question.
i was a very, very true believer until i saw the child molesters in my hall and how that whole thing was handled.. my husband is older than i am and had been an elder for 12 when we married.
so fast forward to 06, we are in a hall where i thought all the elders were ok at the worst and great at the best.
@ LITS
Sorry to read of your terrible experience. It is brave of you to put this in writing and post on the forum. That in itself is a huge step going forward.
May I ask; have you told all of this to your husband and is he aware of the real impact it is having upon you?
As Zeb alluded to, it would be advisable to have a few sessions with a therapist / counsellor. No, you are not crazy however, this has been going on for far too long and you need to address this 'depression / anxiety' in order to move forward with your life.
