(1) Why are many on both sides so fanatical? Presumably there must be humanly intelligent, morally decent, rational beings in both JW and ex-JW camps. And surely, objectively speaking, the Watchtower organization is neither 100% evil nor 100% perfect. Why is it apparently just as difficult for ex-witnesses to see anything positive in the organization as it is for current Witnesses to admit that there might be weaknesses?
What you call fanatical is merely passionate expression of issues close to the heart of posters. The day that the Watchtower and us EXJWs can meet as equals on a different plane from the one these issues were created, only then can we enter into a spirit of understanding. As is evident from the treatment of Bill Bowen there is a better change of the Taliban meeting to negotiate a truce with Bush than the geriatric senile leaders admitting wrongdoing and negotiating a truce.
(2) Is the participation of ex-JW's on this and similar web-sites typical of all who leave the JW religion? What percentage do you think become vocal opponents of the Watchtower, and what percentage just move on and get on with their lives? Why are so many now atheists or agnostics? Do many ex-JW's now belong to traditional Christian groups? (They appear to be a silent minority here.)
Good questions get me a grant and I will do the empirical study at the university I teach at to answer your questions.
(3) The opposing camp emphasize what they perceive to be the weaknesses of Witnesses (arrogance in claiming only they are right, fanaticism, deceitfulness [at the very least "spin"] with regard to their beliefs, self-righteousness, excessive concern with appearances, manipulation, etc.). Obviously these qualities are not unique to JW's. Could it not be said that they are common, even typical of organized religion in general? Or to take it a step further, might it be said that they are basic to human nature? Is it reasonable for some JW's to paint all ex-witnesses as "evil apostates"?
Opposing is as opposing does, so it depends from where you are making your subjective perceptual presuppositioin. I think JWs and EXJWs are two sides of the same coin, generalized passionate dissagrements that can not be reconciled. The JWs want to control their membership because of the big money and power that is at stake. While I don't claim to speak in behalf of all EXJWs, in general we want the Watchtower to come clean and practice an epistemology of the spirit of Chrisitanity, rather than the high control cultish pyramid power structure.
(4) A lot of what is written on this board is reminiscent of what you might hear from a disgruntled divorcee describing their former spouse's behavior. There would appear to be a lot of bitterness, sarcasm/irony, "demonizing" in general. Some comments I have read are frankly vulgar, others more sophisticated, but in all cases, the question arises: How objective is the picture they portray? After all, even ex-witnesses (who may have spent years in the organization) must surely have enjoyed SOME positive benefits from their adherence to the organization that justified their staying as long as they did. Aside from raising questions of the objectivity of those who write about their experiences with the organization, one wonders whether such an approach is conducive to good mental and emotional health. Clearly such an all-embracing shift in worldview would cause great emotional upheaval, but are there more mature ways of dealing with it?
Again two sides of the same coin, JWs and EXJWs. The issue of mental health applies to both camps. Of course there are more mature ways many like Bowen, Lee Elder, Franz, Penton, myself and other predecesors have made the rational attempt only to be stonewalled, demonized and expelled in a very cruel and dishonorable way.
5) Without questioning the sincerity of many current or former JW's, what is gained by constant efforts to criticize or condemn the other side? If ex-JW's have found something they like better, what is to be gained by attempting to induce them to stay, even if you think they are making a colossal mistake by leaving? On the other hand, if current witnesses are satisfied with their religion, then why try to disillusion them, even if you believe they are hopelessly mistaken? (Ex-JW's who are now atheists would presumably agree that in 100 years from now, everyone, JW or not, will be in the same situation [i.e. dead], so what difference could it possibly make?)
This forum is different things to different people. For some it's a place to have a catharsis by the expression of their painful experience, for others it's an educational forum, for others it's a place to make new friends who share a painful past (kindred spirits who understand each other), for others it's a support group not unlike AA, and for others it's a place to vent their anger and rage, etc., etc.
(6) To what extent are both sides willing to accept responsibility for their own decisions? It is easy to cry mental manipulation, brainwashing, etc, but in reality such a paradigm could hardly account for millions of people subscribing to this or that belief system. It would seem that people who believe the Watchtower (or any other religious or non-religious tenets) do so because they have CHOSEN to believe it; people who don't believe it have CHOSEN not to believe it. That is not to say that such choices are always made consciously; many are made by default. But would you agree that there is a strong tendency in both camps to say that the problem is all "out there," with the other side? How realistic is such a position?
You will find many more people on the EXJW side who are willing and have taken responsibility for their choices. The problem is here and there, we have seen the enemy and the enemy is both us and them. "Some people look at the way things are and they ask why?. Others look at the way things could be and they ask why not"? That would take a whole book to explain it so just keep reading if you want the answers.
I am not naive enough to think that there is a way to bring all factions together to a common conclusion, but I am curious to know, define and describe what exactly is going on here. Is it a group of victims gathering together for solidarity and support, or - returning to the divorce analogy - a group of persons willing to engage in mutual complaining and "confessing the sins" of their former spouses? And why would any JW who is satisfied with his religious affiliation wish to post here?
Yes. Well some JWs come here for special attention, some like it so much they stay. These become our honorary punching bags. As long as people are victimized they will need a place to have others witness their atrocities by hearing their stories. This place is as good as any to do that.
"Some people think they are thinking when they are merely re-aranging their prejudices" William James
Victor Escalante
