cultBgone

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Posts by cultBgone

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  27

  How can I ever leave this cult?

  by Julia Orwell in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've been out nearly two years but it's not out of me.

  i am on school holidays now til february so i thought without work to worry about i can come off my medication.

  i phased it slowly, starting in early november to avoid the physical side effects of coming down.

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  cultBgone

  Dear Julia --

  It's hard to add anything as Ajax said it so well, but please be assured that you are not alone in your feelings!

  Anyone, including most on this board, have gone through the feelings you described: unworthiness, trust issues, that guilt bell ringing about nearly everything, the immense shame we feel once we realized we were bamboozled by a cult, all of it. We were taught NOT to trust ourselves, that we didn't understand ANYTHING, that we were dumb sheep blindly following "the shepherd", that women are "less", that the world is crazy but we were righteous and special, and so many other stupid things.

  Dear girl, don't blame yourself. Don't beat yourself up. You are in some very good and intelligent company!

  And unlike on facebook and in the jdubs, normal people don't have a gazillion friends. It is a huge shift to come out of a group numbering 8 million to being just you, your family and two friends...and I say CONGRATULATIONS! That is REAL LIFE and those are REAL friendships and relationships. The relationships in the bOrg are phony ones, as evidenced by how quickly we are dropped like hot potatoes once we walk away. But YOUR life is REAL and you should be so proud of yourself for waking up.

  I am proud of you.
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  12

  Sister in congregation diagnosed w/AML Leukemia. I'm so mad right now.

  by azor in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just need to vent.

  i want to scream from the rooftops right now.

  life is hard enough when you battle blood cancer but is an unnecessary evil put upon good people by this evil cult.

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  cultBgone

  They flat out no longer care about them as they are no longer an income source. The bOrg just moves on to find more. Leeches of the most poisonous sort are the wts and soul-sucking gb members.

  More ELDERS and Members need to WAKE UP and LOVINGLY ASSIST people to get out.

  OnTheWayOut knows how to do it:

  We have to find non-threatening ways to penetrate the deep level of belief in anything WTS says. I use everyday conversations to make my wife think. She knows that college/education is extremely valuable to get by in today's world, she is upset at newstories of robbing people of their rights or making women secondary citizens to men. I encourage her independent thinking. I strike nerves on her dissonance but try to keep her religion out of it.
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  17

  Without You

  by compound complex in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i dreamed, once again, you were at my side talking, laughing, loving.

  the sun warmed my face and you my heart as we lived a life forever.. i awoke with a start that left behind the land of our past, viewing my today for the misery and sadness that, truly, it is and ever shall be.. is it better to live in the land of dreams with the one i love or to exist alone and awake, recalling the dark intent that poisoned your heart?.

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  cultBgone

  CoCo, so nice for you to have an old friend reappear! It's interesting to me how we connect more deeply with people we knew when growing up that with people we meet later in life. Wishing you happy days ahead.
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  6

  christmas

  by venting in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  i feel bad that i was not able to let my kids enjoy christmas.

  i think it has alot to do with how you were raised.

  for some i know christmas was not that big a deal.

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  cultBgone

  Billy, well said!
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  13

  The Abandoned Husband

  by compound complex in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  not of your own accord would you slip away and leave this fragile and wounded man unattended.

  i love you deeply, but, i admit, erratically.

  my flaws are manifold.

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  cultBgone

  CoCo, beautifully written. I love how you are able to express your emotions poetically and am happy that you survived the turmoil.

  GTTM, it may destroy your family - but it will not destroy you. So sorry for your pain though, I have a daughter stuck in myself.
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  32

  Want to hear something funny ?

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my husband just won the city wide holiday light display for christmas i am so proud .

  just a few short years ago i was the one that put a strand of white lights around the porch railing ,and a couple of lighted deer in the yard ....that brought the elders around real quick (after three years of silence ) at that time my husband was still holding onto the notion his faith was not bond to a cult .

  it didn't take long after the 'loving sheparding call' for him to see things in another light.

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  cultBgone

  Actually the light got brighter for him. - Smiddy

  Amen.
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  31

  Why do ultra rich jehovahs witnesses get a free pass when it comes to being materialistic?

  by hoser in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know a couple of jws in my town that are both very wealthy.

  one has upscale retail stores and owns a property development company.

  the other has a large service company and owns a lot of real estate.

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  cultBgone

  Ignoranceisbliss, their wealth is not the issue, though.

  It's that these wealty ones openly flaunt their wealth, are appointed to oversight of the congregation which allows them to chastise an un-wealthy one for working on a meeting night, and then they themselves are then treated like celebrities and the rank&file dubs worship them.

  Very unlike true "christian" behavior all around.
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  48

  Any Senior Citizens, Retirees here?

  by AlwaysBusy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  howdy....well, what do you think?

  of everything?

  is it all crazy?

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  cultBgone

  Had plenty saved for retirement but unexpectedy had a family, which took care of those funds and then some. I never expected to be working full time at 61, but with rising prices and no longer owning a home, I'll have to keep working for another 5 years to reap some decent social security if it's still around.

  Although living in south Florida really makes me want to be retired, I'm happy to have a fun job working with energetic entrepreneurs who are generous with their employees. I've worked through that dreadful realization of mortality we all get when leaving the bOrg and now figure I have at least 25-30 good years to enjoy this life!
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  45

  can an unhappy married woman vent?

  by sowhatnow in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i continue to be saddened by the fact that i am married to such a selfish man.. i want to know if i am the only wife who has no say when it comes to using the house she lives in for activities including other people.. .

  let me explain.. yesterday my daugher who is 35 got a new puppy for my grandaughter who is 13. today my daughter and son in law are going to help my uncle at a job, and my granddaughter wanted to spend the day here, my daugher said shed bring her and the puppy over, i laughed and said 'your dad wont have that, ill have to go to your house'.. after all it will 'upset' the 2 cats they will hide all day [like they do anytime someone including my grandchild is in my home] .. i already knew that he would not like it if she brought the puppy over, [weve had dogs so its not like he hates them].

  he doesnt care if his grandaughter would have enjoyed playing with the puppy over grandmas house, where she likes to be for a change, and that fact that id like to see what my cats would do when they saw a dog for the first time in thier lives.. maybe id have liked to play with the puppy .. when i said to my husband that my daughter said she wanted tp bring them over he said.

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  cultBgone

  Great comments and advice...and remember, it is NEVER too late! Some of us older than you may have a more difficult time "starting over", but you are a spring chick! Three decades to LIVE, go live it and get away from that misery.

  YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY, BUT THE ONLY PERSON WHO CAN MAKE YOU HAPPY IS YOU.
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  88

  Why JW marriage is a huge problem for the organization.

  by kneehighmiah in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the difficulty of finding a marriage mate is well known for sisters.

  but i would say it's hard for brothers also.

  i was talking to a jw last night.

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  cultBgone

  I know some female jdubs in their 20s who are great fun and quite spiritual in a non-pretentious jw way (they don't look down on others). Yet they have fallen victim to the "dowdy" dress standards encouraged by the bOrg and the obesity issue does not seem to register as a problem with them. They don't understand that their cheerful, spiritual personalities are not enough to attract a mate.