my wife and i never received an invitation to the memorial ,last year we did ,but not this year.i am the only one where we live in this small town who has challenged the witnesses on the couple of times they have called on our home these past 5 years .
my wife has never been confronted with them.my son and his wife both ex jw`s have not had what used to be called shepherding calls in the 5 years they have been here.none of them have ever been disfellowshipped or disassociated themselves from the organization ,whereas i did a couple of years ago.da`d that is.a couple of months ago they by-passed our house in the d2d ministry that i witnessed.so my wife is not worthy of a call?
she has never said a bad word about them .and they have never spoken to her in the 5 years we have been here .
Sounds typical. If a woman didn't have a man to offer in my old congregation, nobody paid attention to her.My mom's crowing glory was the fact that she finally got my dad to convert. Within 2 months of his baptism he was already assigned "priveledges".
Single moms, those with unbelieving mates & those married to DA'd or DF'd men were very much ignored or even looked down on. The only exception to this was young unmarried pioneering women who could bring more men in (one way or another).
for the brothers .... suit jacket and pants must always match as part of a complete suit.sport jacket and slacks not permitted.shoes must be polished (i had to go home and change shoes once).shirt should be white or close to white (i.e.
no dark colored dress shirts).do not wear bright colored suits or suits with more than one color (not including pin stripes).tie should not be bright colored or have too many colors.pants should have cuffs (this was recommended, not a rule).suit jacket must be buttoned up at all times (although you may wait until you begin speaking to button up your jacket).never put your hand in your pocket, even for one second.legs must be close together (his exact words were "do not have a horse stance").heels must be together but toes should be slightly apartif you are holding a microphone, the microphone must be point just above the chin, not at the mouth.if you are holding a microphone, do not put the other hand in your pocket (i cannot stress this enough, they will get you for this).do not lean on the lectern (podium, pulpit).whew!
strict dress-code guidelines straight from the presiding overseer.
The company you work for PAYS YOU! JWs don't get paid to do the door to door. All of this dressing up gets expensive! Especially on a part time salary.It's also another way to create a class system within the congregation.
Also, to me it seems to make people distrustful. An outsider who comes in wearing a nice pair of jeans and a polo is seen as underdressed. Wouldn't it be better to blend in with people a little bit while still being respectful? I'd be less leary of a guy in nice khakis and a polo than a full suit.
things for jehovah's witnesses to think hard about.. .
1.you cannot change what you refuse to confront.. look at how you are feeling most of the time.
that sense of going nowhere and feeling down is not because you aren't spritual enough.
Very nice! ( Also, I'm really hoping #4 is a Fight Club reference!)
several times on this board i have read comments from people who were considering joining a new religion.
and how a jw baptism was not "valid", so there should be no problem while getting ready to join the new church.. if a baptism is not real, what about other aspects of life,, such as a marriage ?
outside of the legal requirements that are written down and recorded, from a spiritual standpoint, is it just a bunch of nonsense ?.
Caliber- You are absolutely correct. At the time of my baptism and first marriage, I was a teenager. I didn't understand what I was really supposed to be doing. In the warped JW world, it was hard to understand up from down at times. Since leaving I have VOWED to myself to never again be pressured into making a commitment under duress or because of a sense of duty or expectatation. I regret being in a postition of living a lie. I will not do that again!
Mind Blown- I could see that happening too. If only the courts would recognize it, the WTBTS would probably start with the lawsuits! I believe Scientology has a million year contract for their members, maybe the GB will take note. I wonder if the little kids would be allowed to sign in crayon?
several times on this board i have read comments from people who were considering joining a new religion.
and how a jw baptism was not "valid", so there should be no problem while getting ready to join the new church.. if a baptism is not real, what about other aspects of life,, such as a marriage ?
outside of the legal requirements that are written down and recorded, from a spiritual standpoint, is it just a bunch of nonsense ?.
I'm glad that I made some sense.
several times on this board i have read comments from people who were considering joining a new religion.
and how a jw baptism was not "valid", so there should be no problem while getting ready to join the new church.. if a baptism is not real, what about other aspects of life,, such as a marriage ?
outside of the legal requirements that are written down and recorded, from a spiritual standpoint, is it just a bunch of nonsense ?.
I'd says this depends on ones state at the time of the marriage. I personally only married the first time out of a sense of duty. I didn't love him. Since we'd never been allowed to be alone together, I didn't even really know him. When I left, I didn't feel like I'd really broken a bond with him. He wasn't right for me. I wasn't right for him. I honestly just wanted a way out of my house.
I am married now & it doesn't feel like the second time for me. My heart was never in the first one. My commitment to my husband feels like a real one now. The paper and ceremony were really just a celebration of our love. I'd already chosen him in my heart. To me that is the difference.
However, many JWs do marry for love. Some even leave together and still consider themselves married. There is not a problem with that. I'm sure that some even choose to renew their vows within their new religion to make their new relationship with god a part of their marriage.
I suppose I'd say the same about baptism as well. When I was baptized, I did it to be allowed to date my now ex-husband. I didn't say the prayer beforehand like I was supposed to. I didn't even respond when they asked the questions. I just stood in line and got dunked. I do not consider myself to be baptized at all. If I belived in god and wanted to join a church, I would be baptized properly.
any suggestions to bring a end to the attacks on us who have.
left the borg and continuing efforts to alienate our love one still.
in the borg.. how about this, we all send letters to hq, flood the mail room with.
Is there any reason somebody coudn't just go into the conventions and leave pamphlets etc in the restrooms etc? Just something with the website addresses? Hell, what's to stop someone from going in with a tshirt and walking around during lunch?
Have the owners of these venues been contacted about what they are supporting by allowing the JWs to congregate there?
hi folks.
that's right, the new june 15th 2013 study edition is out now on this link.... http://download.jw.org/files/media_magazines/28/w_e_20130615.pdf.
the following quote caught my eye, from the final study article on page 28.... .
The sad part is, even if you did go back just for family, IT'S NOT REALLY YOUR FAMILY! IT'S THE JW VERSION OF YOUR FAMILY! The same for friends and anyone you know that is still in. Nobody is allowed to truly be themselves. So many have been in for so long that they don't even know who they are anymore and the born-ins never had a chance to become themselves.
this morning i woke up thinking about a friend of mine, i will call her sara...here's some of the back story.. we grew up together and have always been good friends, even though we wouldn't stay in touch, we would just pick up where we left off.
sara has always been different, and i never really knew what it was growing up, but i didn't care, she was my friend.
so we lost touch for many years and then about 4 yrs ago when i went back to my home town, we reconnected.
It's never a bad idea to reach out to a friend!
Even if she is a JW sympathizer or still believes, you are not commiting any wrongdoing by contacting her. It's her choice to react. You would be doing the right thing.
I only have one friend from inside the JWs. We are both out now. Although we don't sit around obsessing about what happened to us in the organization, it's comforting to know that she understands where I've come from more than anyone ever could. I love having that!
i have been out of the "truth" for about 13 years, but 9 of those years i was someone who was out but thinking i would probably go back at some point...out but not all the way out mentally.
my family are still active members and i am a little bit shunned, not invited to family get togethers, that sort of thing.
i was one of those people that left and then did drugs and partied for a while.
Nice to have you with us! I'm fairly new to the forum myslef. Like you I have been out for quite a while though (11 y ears). I think you will be surprised at a lot to fhe things you will learn here. You will hear many stories & hopefully make some friends too.
