LOL!!!
Here's an application I saw several years ago.
ESTEE
APPLICATION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER
NAME:_____________________ AGE:________ PHONE:______________________
ADDRESS____________________ CITY:__________ PROV:____ ZIP:__________
CHURCH:____________________ NUMBER OF TIMES ATTENDED LAST YEAR:_____
1. Do you drive ( ) Sports car ( ) Van ( ) Station Wagon ( ) M/C
(If you checked any of the above, put the pen down, walk slowly to the door and start running as fast as you can)
2. Please complete this sentence: THE PLACE FOR A WOMAN IS
__________________________________________________________.
3. In 50 words or less, describe what "NO" means to you:
__________________________________________________________.
4. In 50 words or less, describe what "LATE" means to you:
__________________________________________________________.
5. Describe where you would least like to be shot:
__________________________________________________________.
6. Have you ever had your testicles: ( ) REMOVED ( ) CRUSHED
( ) PLACED IN A PAIR OF VICE GRIPS ( ) SHREDDED
7. Which is the last bone you would like to have broken?
__________________________________________________________.
8. Have you ever thought how you would do things with no fingers?
( ) Yes ( ) No
9. What do you want to be "IF" you grow up? ____________.
10. Have you ever thought about what it would be like to be:
( ) QUADRAPELEGIC ( ) PERMANENTLY SCARRED ( ) CRIPPLED FOR LIFE
11. Have you ever seen what a hunting bullet can do at long range?
( ) Yes ( ) No
12. Do you know the effective range of a 30.06?
( ) Yes ( ) No
NEXT OF KIN: _____________________________________
FUNERAL HOME (OR BODY REMOVAL SERVICE) OF CHOICE: __________________
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE AN ORGAN DONER? ( ) Yes ( ) No
PARENTAL USE ONLY:
LOOKS LIKE ( ) MEL GIBSON ( ) DENNIS RODMAN ( ) PEE WEE HERMAN
STATUS ( ) ACCEPTED ( ) REJECTED ( ) ARRESTED ( ) TERMINATED