Posts by breal

38

My DF'd Niece Wasn't Reinstated Because She Talked To Me, My Daughter& Mom

by minimus in

jw
friends

she met last night with her elders.

she wasn't reinstated again.

(it's been a few yrs).

breal

That is horrible - not only the betrayel of keeping someone else's letter, but then to try to trick her with questions that they think they already have answers to. Then to keep her in limbo for another week while they officially "decide" - not very loving on there part. I wonder if they realize what a horrible "witness" this gives to others, like her "wordly" spouse who must be outraged by how they are treating her. So often the elders contradict themselves - needing 2 witnesses on one hand for serious unlawful offences but then basing decisions on hearsay when someone like your niece is trying to be reinstated.

BReal

60

So I quit smoking today..

by Aztec in

jw
friends

...and i'm feeling pretty good right now.

i quit, cold turkey, this morning.

it's been almost 24 hours since my last cigarette.

breal

My two favorite replacements were licorice and straws. I cut up straws into cig sizes and played with them, chewed on them etc. Paperclips and elastics are good to have around too as anything to keep the hands busy helps. Good Luck with this. For me the first day, 3rd week and 6th week were always the toughest! (Can you tell I have quit several times - for 6-9 months each time)

33

Shunned? You are better off....

by DJ in

i have to tell you that if you are currently shunned, although it may be painful....you are actually better off imo.

having had it both ways now, i am convinced that it was less painful than being halfway accepted (as i am now because my dad is sick).

my conscience is clear and it feels so good but at the same time i am in more pain than when i was shunned.

breal

((DJ))

Hang in there! I know it is not much comfort but know that you are doing the right thing by trying to be supportive of your dad while the rest of the family are wasting precious time with gossip and creating problems where none need to be. It can be very hard to be the better person especially in the situation where shunning is done as a matter of convenience by some but do your best to ignore there hurtful ways and realize that you are helping out because of the good person you are and because you love and respect your dad.

43

Why On Earth Did You Ever Become A Witness & What Made You Decide To Leave?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i've known for years that if i was visited at my home by jehovah's witnesses, i would have become a do not call.

i would have firmly but politely told the witnesses to never come back to my door and bother me again.

since i was raised "in the truth", i learned the religion from infancy.

breal

Raised in it. Saw too many people that were nasty, political, unhappy, bitter, vengeful, and judgemental despite there claim to belong to/have the "truth" and they were living contrary to this "way of life" they preached about. From what I saw being a JW had little to do with one’s relationship with God or spirituality but rather it was about the Organization, power & politics. Discovered that it was not the right religion for me and that I can be a good person despite not belonging to any religion.

27

Classic TV

by teejay in

when it comes to tv, every generation since the fifties thinks theirs had the best tv shows.

while america has fallen in love with "reality" tv shows like survivor and american idol, i've been thinking about how much better the shows were when i was coming up....

classic westerns like rawhide, gunsmoke, guns of will sonnet, bonanza, have gun will travel, the big valley, high chapparral, and wagon train.

breal

Loved the Fugative and the Avengers.

Now I watch Y&R - silly but it makes me laugh after work. For reality TV shows my favorite is the Amazing Race. I have great respect for there ability to nagivate through strange and exotic places on a deadline and with little or no knowledge of local customs etc. Plus the team dynamics and diversity of the teams is entertaining.

6

Are DF'd ones in your congregation friendly with you?

by JH in

jw
friends

when i was an active jw, everyone talked to me.

when some were df'd, they avoided me, not to be shunned.

now that i'm out of the org, "inactive since so many years", whenever i meet df'd people, they won't talk to me much.

breal

Prior to being DF'd when I was at a really low point emotionally & spiritually I kept having flowers delivered with a happy face on the card. Nothing else. The florist stated that the sender wanted to be anonymous. Being young and somewhat of a romantic at that age I believed I had a secret admirer of one of the young brothers. Months pass and a brother in our hall was reinstated and after chatting with him again he mentioned that he was the one sending the flowers as he noticed how different I was being or acting and wanted to encourage me. I don't think I ever really thanked him properly or told him really how wonderful those roses and the card made me feel. How ironic that none of the other brothers or sisters that saw me all the time noticed nothing and yet this one DF'd person was so sweet. I have not been in the position to be around any other DF'd (other than SPAZ now) but that really opened up my eyes to the fact that people are just people no matter if they are in the "truth" or not.

31

Sayings of wisdom

by Simon in

1- i can only please one person per day.

today is not your day.

tomorrow is not looking good either.

breal

“Often the very things that change our lives irrevocably originally go unnoticed.”

“Silence is the sound that can roar without sounding.

It is both deafening and listless and exposes the innermost secrets of the brain.”

The “bad” things in life serve to make us appreciate the good even more therefore few things are all bad.

7

To dream or not to dream

by teejay in

jw
friends

azaria started a thread yesterday asking: of all the people who have ever lived, who would we most like to spend a day with?

several made very touching comments about a parent or grandparent and it got me to thinking about something.

my (loyal jw) mother has issues of her own not all of them jw related but she and i have always gotten along although we've never really been that close.

breal

"Broken dreams are much more devastating than a painful reality" ~ author unknown

Your post brought that quote to mind - not that I agree with it fully. Not sure either is better or worse but that somehow our reality and our dreams intertwine to get us through life. If one is too lost in dreaming then they may miss out on pleasures in real life and without dreams well where would one be?

Breal

21

Is It Still A Man's World?

by Guest 77 in

jw
friends

what, no anointed sisters on the gb?.

ok, i just used that question to get the ladies responses.. this week's news coverage had to do with a annika sorensen, a professional female golfer competing in a men's golf tournament.

according to the no spin zone o'reilly show, the majority of the people gave a thumbs down for a woman to compete in a man's tournament.

breal

Guest 77 - hmm...not sure where I gave the idea of being against it - I am more of a "live and let live" or "to each there own" type of mentality. I simply won't watch the tournament - but then again I wouldn't watch if it was say Tiger Woods either as I am not into golf other than pitch n putt. As I said before more power to these women....and hey if she was invited she must have what it takes.

14

Strange Memories..

by breal in

about 6 or 7 years ago after being df'd and shunned by family and friends for so many years.. i got to thinking that perhaps if i tried to get reinstated.

not entirely sure that i really wanted to or if it was simply an idea to do this and then just did a slow fade (if that is really possible) - then i would be able to be around my family and friends like old times again.

i even attended a few meetings in the new city i had moved to.

breal

Thanks - the mood has past!

Nina - yep you are so right about feeling beautifully free

Thanks for the welcome outnfree & shamus.

Mystery - nope I don't ever want to go back...just thinking of phases since I have left and one thing led to another. I am very happy now with how my life is but like Nina says there is a scar.

Big Tex - Right you are! Much better off!

Cheers,

Breal