Posts by Bruja-del-Sol

26

I want to grow my hair back out!

by onlyastory in

a few months prior to baptism i had shoulder length hair which i loved and had wanted ever since i was a child.

i remember sitting with an elder during a bible study and asking him point blank if i 'had' to cut my hair.

whilst the answer was given slightly awkwardly the answer was a no, "there are no rules that say you have to cut your hair".

Bruja-del-Sol

Funny, the OP's question makes me think of my ex-husband who always wanted to grow his hair longer than the brothers thought was 'decent' (especially his father who was PO at the time). But he always waited weeks before he finally went to the hairdresser, even when several brothers in the hall came to him with semi-sarcastic jokes. And of course his father wasn't pleased, but that was probably the main trigger to NOT go to the hairdresser 'in time' (funny thing is that our son has the exact same attitude and sometimes waits months before going to get his hair cut. Even though he's not a JW there are lots of people who think it's necessary to make a comment about someone's hairdo when it's getting longer than 'usual'... they just don't understand that the more comments they make, the longer he'll wait hahaha).

I also recall the shock in our last hall when my ex came in one day completely bald! He had a bet with a colleague: he would get 500 Dutch guilders if he would let his colleague shave his hair off. The colleague thought he would never do it, being a JW and knowing that I wouldn't really like it (understatement LOL)... but my ex said "fine, go ahead. Oh and thanks for the money". He came home from work and rang the doorbell, so I would come to the door to see it while his colleague was still there... Jaw dropping moment, but I barely showed it. I stayed pretty cool and asked "what happened?" and then he showed me the money he received. And that was that... LOL. That night or the night after we went to the hall... really hilarious! Nobody dared to ask him why he did it, they totally ignored his lacking hair!

31

Announcement made about me

by KariOtt in

jw
friends

hubby informed me that an announcement was made to his congreation not to approach us when we are out together.

this was done at his request.

another way he can control me i guess.

Bruja-del-Sol

Sounds like you need to get some more proof of the things your hubby is telling you. I've heard of people who went 'to work' everyday, while they were being fired weeks before but were too scared to tell their spouse. So is your hubby REALLY going into field service, or just saying he is?

At least I agree with previous posters that there has never been such an announcement about 'not approaching a brother while he's with his never-a-JW-wife', this sounds like pure BS. He's trying to fool you, probably for 'control' reasons.

16

When Simon met me, he told me I was "The One"

by ILoveTTATT in

jw
friends

"the one" person whom he had ever met who hadn't seen the matrix.... .

i am gonna watch it today!!.

shhhh don't tell me the end!!

Bruja-del-Sol

You should also watch 'The thirteenth floor' (Craig Bierko, Armin MuellerStahl, Gretchen Mol) too then and 'The Game' (Michael Douglas & Sean Penn).

Same sort of theme, very good movies IMHO.

16

Sexting, thinking with my little head

by stillin in

i had no idea, having come from such a sheltered life, how tantalizing those little text messages could be.

i'm a married man.

my wife has pretty much decided that sex is not for her anymore.

Bruja-del-Sol

I've done what you're considering: I've left my husband for some horny messaging guy I met through the internet. Sex with my ex-husband was not good, I didn't like it. I'm also a three time abuse victim (lucky me... pffff), so sex will always be sort of a struggle for me. But this guy knew how to turn me on, where I thought that I was frigid he proved me wrong. So after a couple of months I left my then husband, got DF'd and in a couple of weeks I was living together with this oh so sexy guy...

And it turned out he wasn't that sexy after all. He was actually good in bed, but the rest of him was awful! He was rude, unkind, he lied, was looking for fights all the time, made me cry more in a year that I had cried in 15 years of marriage... so I was wrong! The only thing that was good about him was that he gave me the courage to leave my husband! I would've never felt strong enough to do that on my own. And even my ex-husband admits that if I hadn't left, he would have never done it. Not because our marriage was so good, but because of all the logical reasons: having two kids together, a mortgage, a business and a shared life for over a decade... But he thanked me years after our divorce for having the courage to go, 'cause he now knows we're both better off and even the kids say they are glad I did what I did.

But the guy I did it for.... it was a joke, really, nothing of real worth!

add: except for the text messages, I've been open and honest to my ex-husband. I never cheated on him, I had already left him when I had the first time sex with the other guy. And I promised my ex to tell him if I did, so he would be free to re-marry a nice sister (which I stupidly did and got DF'd for it, not knowing that within three months my ex would leave the JW's too!!! So after all it wasn't necessary for me to be DF'd after all, I could have faded if I wouldn't have been the pleaser to 'help my ex out'... My ex feels sorry for me now, I've lost everything but our kids because of this, and he went into the world, found him a nice young chick, started smoking cigars, had sex without being married, even let her move in with him, and married her a couple of years later and no JW ever gave a damn about what he did. The only advantage I had by being DF'd is that I knew instantly who were the people I could count on... the only one was my ex! I'm glad we're still friends).

3

PLEASE HELP!!! How come when I go to make a comment or...

by Newly Enlightened in

click on a members only topic, the 'sign in' page comes up and i"m already signed in??????.

i'm trying to get into the topic about the literature carts for a video we're doing.

kim.

Bruja-del-Sol

Happens to me too every now and then and I still haven't got a clue why this happens, so I'm curious to the response of someone who knows why/what this is...

40

New here, just wanted to say "Hello"

by Goldiver in

hello all, it is nice to have a forum for former jw's and see i wasn't the only one out there having serious doubts.

my parents got into it when i was about 4 years old.

my family was part of the granville ny congregation.. my dad in time became an elder.

Bruja-del-Sol

Welcome Goldiver, very nice to have you here! Sunny greetings from Spain.

9

I'm going to The Red Sea, 9th Jan.

by quellycatface in

jw
friends

i can't wait.it's the first holiday since i da'd.looking forward to see some sun, fishes and having a chill out.will keep up posting when i'm away.you're .

my friends now.i would miss you otherwise.xx.

Bruja-del-Sol

Have a wonderful trip and I'm already looking forward to whatever you're going to share with us when you're there!

18

I just binned all my meeting clothes.

by quellycatface in

jw
friends

a bit rash but very necessary.i never really liked them anyway..

Bruja-del-Sol

Yeah, I love cowboy boots (and hats!). And about high heels... I've just bought a pair of boots with a heel (not so high but higher than I've had for years). And they're really nice, look very feminine (at least a lot more than my sneakers do), but gosh... do they hurt! But hey, after years of flat shoes, sneakers and hiking shoes my hubby also likes to see every now and then that he's married to a woman hahaha. And in Spain women wear a lot more dresses and skirts, so I think I might buy some this summer... but only the ones I like, without giving one thought about what other people (like a JW congregation) will think of it.

18

I just binned all my meeting clothes.

by quellycatface in

jw
friends

a bit rash but very necessary.i never really liked them anyway..

Bruja-del-Sol

Haha, I couldn't stand the look of those clothes in my closet when I got DF'd, so I also got rid of them pretty soon after. My whole life I've had skirts and dresses, and they weren't the worst. The tights... THAT was awful! Three times a week getting your legs in those horrible tights and trying not to run them... aaaargh. Used to trash at least two tights a week. I really hated the whole dress up thing day after day... I'm usually a jeans and t-shirts kinda girl. So the first couple of years after I left, every tuesday, thursday and sunday I felt happy for not having to change clothes and having to go to the meeting!

10

Blondie's Comments You Will Not Hear at the 01-05-2014 WT Study (VIGILANT PRAYER)

by blondie in

jw
friends

be vigilant with a view to prayers.

present-day christians face a similar challenge because the long night of satans wicked system of things is now at the darkest point in its history.

and how important is prayer with regard to my salvation?.

Bruja-del-Sol

The only one who tought me something about prayer was my grandmother who prayed with me before going to sleep. I can't recall my mother praying, think she's never done it in my presence (or at all, that's what I'm guessing). My father only said his mumbled 'keep-it-short-food's-getting-cold'-prayers before dinner. At least when he thought about it. Most of the time he didn't.

When I got baptized I was told that I had to 'dedicate' myself to god in a prayer, and that I needed to pray while I was being baptized. I didn't have a clue what was expected from me, so I never prayed a 'dedication'-prayer and by the time I got in the water, one hand on the wrist of the opposite arm and the other hand closing my nose, I never got as far as 'dear Jehovah'... and the whole thing was already done, baptized, out of the water, no time for a prayer DURING baptism. So I called that prayer off as well. I was 17 and although I could answer all the questions in the book, I didn't really have a clue what it was all about!

So looking back, my experience with prayer as a JW (and listening to prayers at assemblies, in the KH and visiting and having dinner with other JW's) is that their prayers are mostly very shallow without emotion, just meaningless blabla. And from the platform sometimes used as 'show off'... "listen to me, using such beautiful words, trying to impress you all"... YUK!