HI There- Hi There! Good communication. It's excellent that your daughter opened up for the reasons for saying what she did. Your reaction to the child’s demands for a divorce show that you are a loving and caring parent. You are also wise in not taking the advise of a child without input from friends/peers. Marriage can be tough....Especially as life reveals us truths that are unexpected. You need to do what is right for you and your family- regardless of what people say. As one of our friends stated: Breathe. Stop. Disengage. Distance. Think. Breathe and then think things through. There is not a ‘one size fits all’ response to your dilemma. If you love him and it is returned, do all you can to save your marriage. Think of the future and how it will affect your children. Would a divided household be better than a single parent? Only you can decide.
My situation involved abuse of my child. He was repentant to the elders, but unrepentant and cruel in private. So in my case there was no choice, no matter how much I loved him. A stand had to be taken swiftly and strong message had to be sent that abuse will not be tolerated in any form. Some of my well meaning friends tried to convince me to return, rather than break up the family, but I knew in my heart what was the right course. But believe me, it took years to finally file for divorce, because I loved him. In the end, I made the right decision for our family. (the friends who gave me the bad advise are no longer in my life, and they are still living unfulfilled marriages)
How will we really know until all is said and done and the child is out of the home?
There is wonderful support here at the forum, but digest it at your own pace. It’s your life and once decisions are made, they are hard to undo. Move slowly and deliberately. All the best….4 thgen